Cossack's Comrades

Cossack's Comrades Alpha Season 2 Epilogue 8
Worst Date Ever

It was a Monday evening and the Comrades were about in their base and, well, Jay and Bob were out smoking and dealing. But…

Drill: I'm going out again. I’ll be back later.

Pharaoh: Again? Why do you keep going out?

Drill: …I have stuff to do. Now BB is in charge. Bye.

*And he goes to the teleport room and leaves. *

Dive: This is the second time but he was out for 3 weeks! All because of Cossacks damn computer! This is insane! Did anyone notice anything strange?

BB: Hmmmm….

*Flashback*

BB: Jo Drill, can we use the continuum transfunctioner? We wanna have a jooge anime sex orgy!

Drill (From in his room and singing): Tonight, Tonight wont be just any night! Tonight there will be no morning star! Tonight, Tonight I’ll see my love tonight! And for us stars will stop where they are!

BB: Okay I'm gonna use it now, k?

Drill (Still Singing): Today the minutes seem like hours, the hours go so slowly and still the sky is light!

*End Flashback*

BB: Good times. Hmm my senses are tingling. Lets go find out where he's been going!

Pharaoh: Are you sure?

BB: He left moi in charge and I say we will follow him. Or we could do another anime orgy? Which do you prefer?

Dive: Lets follow him.

BB: Better.

Ring: Hmm it says here he went to Metroville, strange. Where have I heard of that?

Toad: Lets go!

*So they head there and end up in front of a house. The name on the mailbox says Parr. *

Dive: WTF are the Parrs? Are they related to Drill?

Toad: Dunno lets look inside.

*So they looked inside and they see Drill, in human form, sitting at a table with a girl his age with black hair, a baby boy, a blonde haired boy, a fat blonde haired man, and a brown haired woman. *

A.M: So Violet, how are you tonight?

Violet: Fine, Michael. Thanks for coming for dinner.

A.M: Thanks for having me.

Bob: No problem. A friend of my daughters is a friend of mine. Helen, what are you making anyway?

Helen (while holding Jack Jack): Veal Parmesan, Bob. Could someone take Jack Jack?

Dash: I’ve got him.

Jack Jack: Das! Das!

*Outside*

Pharaoh: He’s on a date?

BB: Aww how cute.

*Inside*

Bob: Ahhhh looks great! Here Dash, I’ll cut yours.

*He starts cutting it, and cuts through the plate. Meanwhile Drill notices BB’s light bulb and pretends not to notice. *

A.M: Umm will you excuse me for a second?

Violet: Yeah, me too...

*A.M. heads outside*

A.M: What are you doing here! I'm on a date! If she finds out about this Vi will hate me!

Skull: So she lets you call her Vi?

A.M: Just wait until I get home…

*Meanwhile, while this was going on...*

Vi: Dad! You showed your super strength! How could you! If Michael finds out we are Supers he’ll hate me!

Dash: Doesn’t he let you call him Mike?

Vi: Just wait until he leaves…

*Back to dinner*

A.M: So Dash you run track? Vi tells me you got second in the state finals.

Dash: Yeah I am really fast.

*Unbeknownst to A.M, Vi is making the “Shut up while you’re ahead” gesture*

A.M: Yup. *Shifts his eyes for any search of the CC*

Helen: Is something wrong Michael? You seem jumpy.

A.M: I'm fine.

*Boom! A hole was blasted in the wall and who was it but Kryptoman! *

Krypto: Hehehe. Well now all alone are we?

Bob: Who are you and what do you want with us?

Krypto: I'm Kryptoman and I'm not interested in you, just him.

Vi: Leave Michael alone! He’s harmless!

Krypto: Hohoho! Now mind your tongue, girlie. Harmless is he?

A.M: Get out of here! I have my… where’s my sword!

*Citadel*

Jay: Man that sword is a good bong, right Lunchbox?

Silent Bob: *Nods*

*The Parrs *

A.M: Damn it all. If I transform she’ll think I'm a monster, but if I don't I'm dead, like Dive!

Krypto: Since you wont transform, you will die! Missile barrage!

*And crap loads of missiles are shot at A.M, but a force field protected him! The one who made the force field was…Vi! *

A.M: Okay what happened?

Vi: I made a force field to protect you. Sorry I didn’t say it. My whole family are Supers.

A.M: …Now you tell me! I could have transformed into my armor awhile ago! Transform!

*Drill time! *

Drill: I forgot to say I could change into Drillman, leader of the CC. What can you do?

Vi: I can turn myself invisible and make force fields; Dash can run really fast, my mom used to be Elastigirl and she could stretch, and my dad was Mr. Incredible and has super strength. Jack Jack...well we dont really know but right now Mom put him to bed. What about you? Where is your team? We need all the help we can get, plus I wanna meet em!

Drill: Probably outside still spying on me. Okay guys come out.

Krypto: Oh don't you know? I took care of them already. They are all broken outside.

*Outside everyone is dismembered. Drill sheds a tear and says these words*

Drill: I told them not to come. I wont experience that pain again. Lucky enough they were in robot mode so they can be rebuilt. But that's it! First you ruined my date last time and now this one! Then you threatened to kill my girlfriend’s family and me! Now you nearly killed my friends! I took you into this world and I’ll take you out!

The Parrs(save a sleeping Jack Jack): …

Drill: I built him. Long story. Wait Mrs. Parr you have stretching abilities right?

Elastigirl: Yes but why? Do you have a plan?

Drill: Yeah, send a stretching punch while saying Gomu Gomu no Pistol!

Elastigirl: Okay…Gomu Gomu no Pistol!

*Her armed stretched but the punch had no effect. *

Elastigirl: It didn’t hurt him at all. Now what?

Drill: It wasn’t supposed to. I just like One Piece. ... Hmm?

*Drill sees a character in the shadows and nods. *

Drill: Okay I have a plan. Vi, encase us in a force field and have your dad propel us at him. When we get close to him have your mom stretch you out of safety. Dash I am giving you the most important job of all. Go in your medicine cabinet and find something that can fight the flu. Then put the fluid in this syringe. Don't worry I know what I'm doing. Vi at any time I might say to make a force field so be ready. Lets go.

*The plan was in action! Now Helen just grabbed Vi and Drill activated his big Drill and went through Krypto! *

Krypto: That tickled. Time to regenerate!

Voice: Razor Ring!

*A Ring stuck the regenerating area of Krypto’s body. He screamed in agony*

Krypto: I musta missed one. Damn.

Drill: Ring! Good timing!

Ring: I just barely escaped Krypto’s fire before. Now lets kill this bastard...excuse my language ladies. Uh sort of the spur thing.

Elastigirl: Its okay. It’s the truth. He is a dead bastard!

Drill: Right…Is Dash back yet?

Vi: No not…here he is!

*He runs in like a blur*

Dash: Here you go. What will this do? Huh? Huh? Huh?

Drill: Ring hold him down. Vi, make a force field around Ring, Krypto, and me. It’s the only way to win!

Vi: Okay.

*She made the force field and Drill injected the needle into Krypto and he was nearly dying. Suddenly the house started to rumble. The missile from before is making the house collapse. Krypto teleported away and everyone got out of there! *

Mr. Incredible: Well at least we survived.

Dash: Yeah but our home is destroyed!

Drill: I guess you can stay with us until you get a bigger and better house.

Vi: Yay!

*Back at the base…*

Cossack: WHAT! More people! First the stoners now them! Damn it! How long are they staying?

Drill: Until the government makes them a new home. Well that should be done in a few weeks.

Cossack: Oh no. No way. This is where I put my foot down! They are not staying here!

Dash: Come on Mister. We’ll be homeless. Let us stay here please! Please! Please! (Does this while jumping up and down extremely fast)

Helen: Dash, cut that out! No powers in other people’s houses.

Dash: But mom!

Bob: You heard her.

Cossack: Wait wait wait! What powers?

Vi (Away with Kalinka): Is he always like this?

Kalinka: Unfortunately. Wanna do each others hair while they argue?

Vi: Sure I’ve got nothing better to do. Thanks…uh what's your name?

Kalinka: Kalinka Cossack. And you?

Vi: Violet Parr, but you can call me Vi.

*Back to them*

Cossack: You say you have powers?

Helen: We’ve clearly established that numerous times. Here I’ll show you.

*She stretches her arm across the room and Jay and Silent Bob walk in*

Jay: Woah I think this stuff just kicked in.

Cossack: Interesting. I take it you all have these powers?

Helen: He's a slow one I take it?

Drill: He can make robots but cant even see two feet in front of him.

Bob: I got an idea. Cossack…

Cossack: That's Sergal Cossack or Dr. Cossack to you.

Bob: Right…Listen in exchange for us staying here, we can be sort of bodyguards. We defend you, and you shelter us. Sorta like a feudal contract.

Cossack: Hmm…deal what the hell. My poor pathetic life! Why can’t I live in peace! Well at least Kalinka has a new friend.

Kalinka: Yeah. Vi and I are good friends.

Vi: Ow! You’re pulling my hair!

Kalinka: Oh no! Sorry! Here I’ll help get this comb out…

Dive: How can that baby sleep through all this?

Dash: When Vi and me fight, we get really loud! He gets used to it.

Pharaoh: This is one hell of a season right, Dust?

Dust: I guess.

Jack Jack: *Starts to cry*

Toad: Thats a bad omen.

*To be continued*

Cossack's Comrades

AM as
Drill Man
Sean as
Dust Man
Geoff as
Dive Man
  Keba as
Bright Babe
Err as
Skull Man
 
Rebel40000 as
Ring Man
Sergal as
Pharaoh Man
Dennis as
Toad Man

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