By Sean (Dust Man) with the help of Rebel (Ring Man)
*It is Christmas Eve for the Cossack's Comrades again and while the team is out saving the world, Christmas, the city, a city block, a small street, a random house, or whatever their enemies are currently threatening Dr. Cossack and Kalinka are once again home.*
Kalinka: Looks like the others are going to be out late again as usual. *sighs*
Dr. Cossack: Good riddance, like those ungrateful robots really count as family.
Kalinka: I can't believe you can say something like that around Christmas!
Dr. Cossack: Bah humbug.
Dr. Cossack: What?
Kalinka: Whenever someone says 'Bah humbug' around Christmas four ghosts are summoned!
Dr. Cossack: Four ghosts?
Kalinka: Yes! The ghosts of Christmas past, present, and future!
Dr. Cossack: And the fourth?
Kalinka: Some long, dead friend sent from the grave to warn you about the horrors of your afterlife for the Christmas hating life you lived!
Dr. Cossack: Whatever, I'm just going to bed.
*Dr. Cossack walks to his room and finds that his doorknob has been replaced with a Pharoahman head.*
Dr. Cossack: I see you guys got back and obviously had a tough fight. I guess I need to go back down to my lab now.
*The head comes off from the door and an entire Pharoahman appears covered in chains.*
Pharoahman: Noooo. I am a Ghoooost.
Dr. Cossack: That doesn't sound like Jade... Sergal? You're alive?!
Sergal: Noooo, I already said I was a ghooost!
Dr. Cossack: Okayâ€¦ So what are you doing here then?
Sergal: I am here to warn yoooou about the fate that awaits yoooou in the afterlife, if yoooou continue down this Scrooooooooge-like path chains much heavier than mine will drag yoooou down.
Dr. Cossack: Shouldn't those chains be light with you're robotic muscles?
Sergal: Toooonight, you will be visited by three moooore ghoooosts whoooo will try and convince yoooou to change.
Dr. Cossack: Two questions. What is with the drawn out o's and if you spent so much time helping people why do you get a crummy afterlife.
Sergal: First, it coooomes with being a ghoooost. It is suppoooosed to soooound spooooky. I think it soooounds rather retarded thoooough. They never tell you these things in the advertisements.
Dr. Cossack: And the second? *crosses arms*
Sergal: Wellâ€¦. Fine, you caught me. *chains disappear* They didn't have anyone else to send so they sent me.
Dr. Cossack: Wait, what? And you're talking normally again!
Sergal: No point in keeping up this ruse now and look, do you know how many of these stories are done each year? Christmas time is hectic preparing all these ghosts. Never used to be this way, their used to be only three ghosts of Christmas and they rarely were called in. Usually only worked when asked to do it as a favor by some soul they know, when a prank lover who knew how to summon spirits decided to bring them to the mortal realm, or when they needed the money to pay off some gambling bets. Then some guy writes a book about them and it gets famous. Now millions of Christmas ghosts are needed each year, and the other holidays are getting in as well. The Christmas past, present, and future aren't too hard to get a hold of, those are the fun jobs. But who wants to fly around tied and pulled around by chains while giving a guy a sob story? Plus it has to be the spirit of someone they know, otherwise they go 'Who are you?' or 'Why should I believe you?' Anyways, just sit tight and enjoy the show, I'm going to go home now.
*Sergal snaps his fingers and disappears.*
Dr. Cossack: *mutters* I need to stop taking those free drugs from Jay and Silent Bob.
*Dr. Cossack swings the door open when there is a flash of light.*
Dr. Cossack: Aren't you supposed to wait until I change into pajamas and have already fallen asleep so I can't be left wondering if this was all a dream afterwards?
Ghost of Christmas Past: Not enough time.
Dr. Cossack: Why do you look like Geoff?
Ghost of Christmas Past: *quickly typing on a keyboard* Now thanks to cartoons and the limited drawing capabilities of the artists, people expect the ghosts to look like people I know since cartoonists would have on several occasions the three ghosts of Christmas past, present, and future be three of the characters on the show that weren't being visited by the ghosts. However the dead characters are never used so most of us just disguise ourselves and act like the person we are impersonating.
Dr. Cossack: And you're admitting this all up front?
Ghost of Christmas Past: Well, Sergal already ruined this so now I need to write up a report on this and I can't seem to find any cannon Christmas stories of your youth so it looks like we'll just pretend we viewed some heart wrenching memories and move on.
Dr. Cossack: But I do have Christmas memories!
Ghost of Christmas Past: No cannon ones though, besides we don't have time to get together some sprites of you in your younger days anyways. So moving on!
* Ghost of Christmas Past snaps his fingers and disappears in a flash of light*
Dr. Cossack: *grumbles* Lousy, lazy ghost. These ghosts are probably just trying to make me go blind.
*Another bright flash of light*
Dr. Cossack: Again, no break!
Ghost of Christmas Present: I am the Ghost of Christmas Present! *devours a taco*
Dr. Cossack: You know that I already know and there is no need to act like Keba, right?
Ghost of Christmas Present: *belches* What was that?
Dr. Cossack: Never mind.
Ghost of Christmas Present: *munching on tacos* So lets see how this Christmas turns out and see what an awful, bad, mean man you are!
*Ghost of Christmas Present snaps her fingers and the two of them are then floating by the ceiling watching Christmas unfold for the Cossacks*
Anime Master: Thanks for all the repairs, last night was a mess.
Sean: You even made all the parts squeaky clean. I don't remember the last time the vacuum tube on my head wasn't full of junk, this thing won't be getting too dirty and clogging in the middle of battle anytime soon!
Dr. Cossack: It shouldn't, I went and improved a few minor things on all of your armors you lousy, ungrateful robots.
Rebel: Thanks, and while out last night we decided to pick something up for you.
Sean: It's nothing fancy or expensive unfortunately, we don't really make any money.
Dr. Cossack: *mumbles just audibly* But you have no problem spending all of mine.
*Unable to be seen or heard by those below, the Ghost of Christmas Present tries to educate Dr. Cossack about the improperness of his behavior*
Ghost of Christmas Present: See how mean you are when they are trying to be nice?
Dr. Cossack: Be quiet!
*Back on the floor*
Anime Master Well, as leader I present you with this gift. *hands a rather small package to Dr. Cossack*
Dr. Cossack: Ungrateful machines, this is all the thanks I get. Dr. Light and my other colleagues always send me so much for the things I do for them, which are much less than what I do for you each day. *storms off to his room*
*The CC pause and look sad for a moment, but then shrug off the event and return to the festivities*
Ghost of Christmas Present: Now, let's see how miserable you are alone in your room when you could have been having fun with your friends. *snaps fingers and the two teleport*
Dr. Cossack: We could have just walked the few feet it was!
Ghost of Christmas Present: Shush, you need to both see your sadness and hear your muffled crying in order to change!
*Dr. Cossack, not the one with the ghost, walks in and sits down on the side of his bed. After looking up and making sure the door is closed, he gains a slight grin. He slowly opens the present and a single tear falls from his eyes as he admires it. There is one framed picture of the Cossack's Comrades along with Kalinka and Dr. Cossack, all smiling except Dr. Cossack who as usual has his arms crossed and a slight frown on his face. He then pulls out a small box from underneath his bed and opens it. Inside is a collection of newspaper clippings related to how the CC saved the day or some of the contests and other activities Kalinka was part of. A collection of Kalinka's report cards and a collection of small photos of Kalinka or the CC also were inside. Dr. Cossack was about to put the picture inside the box, but then decides instead to put it on the corner of a desk that he had in his room.*
Ghost of Christmas Past: Wait, so you actually cared about everyone?
Dr. Cossack: Of course, but I have a reputation to maintain!
Ghost of Christmas Past: So you only act like a jerk to maintain your image? *beeping* Ah, shoot. Looks like my time with you is done. *Looks at a watch while two creatures run around by her feet*
Dr. Cossack: What are those? *pointing at two creatures by the Ghost of Christmas Past's feet*
Ghost of Christmas Past: Oh, those are Bob and Fred. I decided to bring them with, I'd introduce them and throw in some weird symbolism but I really have to leave. *Eats a final taco and then snaps her fingers causing a bright white flash*
Dr. Cossack: *finding himself standing in his room once more* Well, that was pointless!
Ghost of Christmas Future: *having been waiting in the room, he walks up to Dr. Cossack and taps him on the back*
Dr. Cossack: Ah, Ghost of Christmas Future. Wouldn't Silent Bob be more appropriate than Zymeth for this one?
Ghost of Christmas Future: *shrugs and then snaps his fingers causing a flash of light*
*Dr. Cossack finds himself floating next to the Ghost of Christmas Future in the X series. A newspaper with a picture of X and Zero on the front page is blown in front of Dr. Cossack.*
Ghost of Christmas Future: *hands Dr. Cossack a piece of paper*
Dr. Cossack: What's this? *reads* "You're creations and works are all forgotten along with your name. The kind Dr. Light is remembered by nearly all for his work and kindness, but your lack of kindness has caused history to overlook you."
A Group of Reploids: Everyone lets go and find those Light holograms so we can get out presents!
Dr. Cossack: What are they talking about?
Ghost of Christmas Future: *hands another note to Dr. Cossack*
Dr. Cossack: Wouldn't it be easier to just break character and talk?
Ghost of Christmas Future: *holds up a sign that says 'I really am mute.'*
Dr. Cossack: Oh. *reads the note* "Other reploids around one Christmas time asked X, a creation of Dr. Light, where he got all his upgrades. X told them about the capsules with a hologram of Dr. Light that he found that contained them; he even showed a few pictures. A younger group of reploids noticed the pictures and found a similarity in appearance between Dr. Light and Santa Claus. Thinking the two were the same, they went and searched for the capsules desiring presents. The group of kids surprisingly found the capsules and managed to take the upgrades from them. The story broke out and it became a tradition of sorts. Some companies and people will put out capsules that they made themselves with a hologram that looks even more Santa-like for people to find and gain presents from." I'm now thinking about what is better, being forgotten or having people think you are Santa.
Ghost of Christmas Future: *hands another note.
Dr. Cossack: *sighs and reads* "He is at least remembered and by most people for what he did and how he acted. No one remembers you."
Voices: To Cossack!
Ghost of Christmas Future: *smacks his head*
*At a nearby bar and restaurant, a group of reploids with rather AIs that are rather old or based off very old ones are celebrating the season*
Geoff: Nice to gather every now and then and remember the old days.
Rebel: Things change, we aren't all on the same team any more.
Anime Master: But we can remember and meet together every now and then.
Zapper: Even with these more powerful forms we still are the same.
Jade: Dr. Cossack may have been an old grouch, but the Cossack's Comrades wouldn't have survived without him.
Sean: I'm surprised by what Rebel says he found in Dr. Cossack's room when he went in their when Dr. Cossack wasn't around.
Rebel: Yeah, after all those years of giving him 'worthless junk' it was still there and great condition without a speck of dirt. And all the gifts he always bragged about couldn't be found or were gathering dust.
Anime Master: Yeah, people might not remember him for bringing forth some great worldly known machine but we remember him.
*The Ghost of Christmas Future snaps his fingers and Dr. Cossack is once again in his room this time with all four ghosts.*
Sergal: Okay, we need to send word upstairs that we need to make some changes to this system. We can't immediately go to someone who says 'bah humbug' without reading their file anymore.
Ghost of Christmas Future: *nods*
Ghost of Christmas Past: Did we even learn anything?
Dr. Cossack: That I'm not as bad as you guys think?
Ghost of Christmas Present: Yes, and I will never forgive you for that! You know what people will be saying about us when they find out we failed to teach a grumpy old man a lesson? They won't bother remembering the fact that there was no lesson to learn!
Ghost of Christmas Past: And all the paper work!
Ghost of Christmas Future: *head sinks and then after a second he gets an idea and quickly starts writing*
Ghost of Christmas Past: What are you working on?
Ghost of Christmas Future: *hands over the piece of paper*
Ghost of Christmas Past: You're right! Who says we have to tell anyone?
Dr. Cossack: And will you guys then be leaving and leaving me alone?
Sergal: Sure, just be a little nicer than usual tomorrow and don't say 'bah humbug' again and the guys upstairs won't bother investigating.
*All four ghosts snap their fingers and disappear in a flash of light*
Dr. Cossack: I'm going to go blind from all those flashes of light! *lies down and finally goes to sleep*
*Later on Christmas Day when Dr. Cossack is receiving his present from the CC.*
Dr. Cossack: Thanks. *accepts the package and walks off*
Rebel: Ok, who spiked my soda?
Anime Master: What are you talking about?
Rebel: I just heard Dr. Cossack actually thank us.
Sean: It is like a Christmas miracle only lamer.
*The CC stands perplexed as Dr. Cossack gives them a look and walks off to his room chuckling.*