NEW Sinister Six in:
Enter The New Sparkster
Gary: Just when you think you know somebody by heart, they go off and surprise you. Well, this is a tale of betrayal, lust, and revenge. So sit tight in your seats and read on! Out with the old, and in with the new I always say. This Epilouge was also co-written by our new beloved Elecman, Leon!
Narrator: It was a normal day at Sinister Six H.Q. The sun is
shining, the bees are buzzing, the robots are zapping...
Ben: Damnit Odin. I said keep it low!
Odin: Sorry, I guess I got a little carried away.
Ben: We're never going to fix this socket if you shock the crap outta me.
Gary: As entertaining as this is, I think I'll eat something.
Ben: Stop standing around and help!
Gary: Almost done...
Odin: What's almost done?
Gary: Popcorn! *takes a bowl empties it out.
Ben: Ouch! Pay attention Odin!
Ben: Get over here and help!
Gary: *plops down on the couch* Hmmmm...donno, watching you guys is much more fun! *eats popcorn*
Odin: *whispers* Shall we get him?
Ben: *whispers back* Yeah...
Odin: So Ice, you ain't gonna help?
Ben: One, two, three!
*the both of them tackle Ice on the couch and steal his popcorn*
Gary: Hey! I popped that and everything!
Odin: *pops his mouthful* Sorry, workers keepers, lazyes weepers! Hahahaha!
Gary: *grumbles and decides to help*
Ben: Bout time, now see if you can reach that wire there.
Gary: *gets shocked by Odin* OUCH! This isn't my kind of work...espically when you're weak to electricity!
Odin: Sorrrrry...oh...be right back guys. I gotta call.
Ben: Hurry back! This outlit ain't getting any younger!
*In Odin's dorm*
Odin: Hello? I'm kind of busy right now, can I call you....
???: It's time.
???: Yes. The time to act is now Odin.
Odin: But...just when I was starting to connect with them.
???: Are you getting soft? Cause if you are, I can take care of that.
Odin: No sir, I'm ready.
???: Gooooood. Remember what we discussed. The Old Factory. Whipe them out.
Odin: Yes Sir! I'll initniate the plan now.
???: I don't want any screw ups Odin. This plan must be done correctly.
Odin: Yes Sir. Odin over and out.
*Odin stares off blankly in his room*
Odin: And so it starts...
*knock at Odin's door*
Odin: Yeah...what is it?
Erik: *opens it* Ready to head out? Dinner awaits.
Odin: Actually there's a problem at the Old Factory downtown.
Erik: Problem? I'm not aware...
Odin: Damnit Erik, must you guys always ask Questions. Just trust me!
Erik: Uhhh...alright. I'll get the others. *leaves*
Odin: *sighs* I'm gonna miss you guys...
*At the Old factory*
???: Now's the time to reveal myself to the Sinister Six. Hehehhehe. All this time, all this planning will finally
come into effect. I doubt Odin's loyalty at the moment, and even if he fails, I still got my secret weapons. Heheheh.
*A Familier roar goes off*
???: Yes my pet, you'll get your revenge soon. Very soon. *cackles madley*
*a flash of light and six figures appear outside the Old run down factory*
Erik: Okay, we're here Odin.
Britt: Yeah, what's so important that we had to meet here?
Odin: I heard of a disturbance.
Gary: What kind of disturbance?
Odin: Again with the blasted questions!? Just shut up and follow me! *runs into the factory*
Ben: Hmmmm...is it me, or has Odin suddenly become a bit flustered?
Rich: *shrugs* Hasn't he always been like this?
Britt: Not really, just this morning he was showing me some awesome tips about saving money at the Grocery Store.
Ben: He seemed jokingly happy when we wrestled the popcorn from Gary.
Gary: True that Benno.
Erik: Well, when a valued team mate is in trouble, we are there to aid. Let's go guys. *follows Odin*
Rich: Right you are big guy! Onward!
*they all follow Odin into the factory*
*Elec Man writes*
*meanwhile, three shadowy figures survey the factory from a nearby rooftop while readying their assorted weapons*
Black Clad Man: You're sure this is the place?
Armored Woman: Scanners don't lie.
Aloof Ass: I still don't see why the hell I've gotta work with you puds.
Black Clad Man: He's gotta point. This job's pay's barely worth a turd if the pay's split three ways.
Armored Woman: Don't bitch to me. I'm not happy with the pay either. But our employers insist none of us could capture him single-handly.
Black Clad Man: That's bullcrap. Old fuggers just doesn't want to cough up a dime, that's all-
*Armored Woman shushes the Black-clad Man while scanning the factory*
Armored Woman: Shut yer trap. I'm picking up half a dozen other readings too.
Black Clad Man: Who?
Armored Woman: "Ben", "Gary", "Erik", "Britt", "Rich" and "Odin". Whoever they are, our employers didn't mention them.
Aloof Ass: Wonderful. Bastards aren't even telling us the whole story.
Armored Woman: *frowns*You don't think they hired another team in case we get humped, do you?
Black Clad Man: Screw it. We're not being paid enough for this. I say if we run into these clowns, we shoot first.
Armored Woman: *nods* Old duffers can sort them out later.
Aloof Ass: ...Whatever.
*the three mercs leap over to the factory's rooftop, ready to move in. Meanwhile...*
Erik: *sees Odin standing in a darkned room* Okay Odin, what's goin' on in here that needs our attention?
Odin: I sense an evil force. Very strong one.
Ben: He's right. There's something here.
Gary: *looks around* I don't see anything.
Rich: Perhappes if Ben or Odin would shead some light here, maybe we can get a visual of our darkened surroundings.
Ben: *looks to Odin who does nothing* Alright, I'll do it. *lights up the room*
Gary: I still don't see anything.
???: Then perhappes you're not looking hard enough.
*everyone gasps at the horror in front of them*
Scorpion: Yes my old friends, it is I. How do you like the new look?
Erik: Scorpion? Isn't that the guy who thrashed Edward?
Scorpion: That is me alright Erik.
Erik: *shrugs* He knows all our names?
Gary: Sorry insect lips, but whatever you are planning, we are here to stop it!
Scorpion: I see...
Erik: What do you want?
Scorpion: To erase you. All of you.
Britt: We outnumber you, I don't think that'll happen.
Scorpion: You don't realize the situation that you all are in. You've been lead into quite a clever trap.
Odin: *rips off his Elecman costume* I won't be needing this anymore...*cackles*
Ben: What the hell is going on?
Erik: What are you doing?
Odin: Questions, questions, questions, that all you guys ever ask? Well don't worry, the answers will come soon.
Scorpion: Indeed they will. But for now it's time for a reunion. Remember this guy?
*A cage opens up*
Pulzar: *roars loudly*
Gary: Oh no...
Erik: Is that?
Britt: But how?
Odin: Yes, quite a monster isn't he?
Rich: Odin, how could you? All this time you were working for Scorpion?
Odin: Yeah, sorry about that. You know, I actually grown attached to you guys, but Scorpion has offered me something you guys can never hope of giving me!
Ben: Oh yeah...what's that?
Britt: *with tears* What about friendship? The power of a team?
Odin: Unfortunatly Britt...that's not what I crave. I crave...power.
*stands next to Scorpion*
Scorpion: Yes, well, now that everything is going according to plan. Let's see how you all fair against the new and improved. Pulzar. Good luck. Don't disapoint me now.
*Scorpion gives the order to attack*
*Elec Man writes*
Gary: This is bull! We killed Pulzar, fair and square!
Scorpion: And we cloned him fair and square. I can't believe you'd just leave that thing's corpse just lying around.
*As Odin's draws his Soul Reaver, Pulzar lunges at Rich with its horn, but Rich leaps out of the way. He with quickly counters with a Hyper Bomb, but it does no damage*
Rich: Erik, if you've got any ideas, I'd like to hear them!!
*Erik chucks a crate at Scorpion, but Scorpion easily deflects it with a mental blast*
Erik: ...Nothing's leaping to mind!
Odin: *slashes at Britt* Who are you trying to fool? You can't take us all!
Britt: *dodges* Hate to admit it, but he's got us on that one! I say we fall back and-
*Pulzar leaps over the Sinister Six and blocks the exit*
Odin: Yeah, fat chance we'd let you do that.
Ben: You miserable bastard! If I'm going down, I'm taking you with me!
*Ben furiously unleashes fire storm after fire storm, but Odin absorbs the assault with his Soul Reaver. Scorpion shoots him in the chest with a laser*
Scorpion: Playtime is over. You all no longer amuse me. Good riddance.
*Scorpion raises his tail, but before he sting Gary, an icey beam freezes Scorpion in place*
Britt: Hey, quick thinkin' Gary!
Gary: That wasn't me, but I'm happy to take credit for it!
*Odin charges his Soul Reaver, but before he can attack, the Aloof Ass leaps through a window and stabs his chest with a gunblade. At the same time, the Black-Clad Man leaps from the rafters and slashes one of Pulzar's eyes with a chainsaw.*
Erik: What the-?! Where did these guys come from?
Rich: Who cares? I'm more interested in who they're fighting!
Britt: Wait, that guy with the chainsaw. Is that-
Armored Woman: *spin jumps from a skylight* I still don't see why you need that thing, Elec Man. Harnessing raw electricity ain't good enough for you or something?
Black Clad Man: Stuff it, Samus! It's better than that dippy swordgun Squall's totin'!
Gary: Damnit! I hate Elec Man! Why can't we ever have just one on our team permanently?!
Elecman: What's that midget's problem?
Squall: For starters, that retarded outfit.
Samus: Cut the chit chat. They're not gonna be out for long. I'll keep the bug busy while the rest of you secure our target!
Elecman: Pffft. Like I needed you to tell me that.
Squall: Hey, who died and made you queen? It's the one with the sword I want!
*the befuddled Sinister Six watches the three do battle. Elec Man dodges the now-thawed Scorpion's laser blasts while retaliating with Thunder Beams. Samus gets slashed by one of Pulzar's claws, but counters with a plasma beam that penetrates Pulzar's thick shell. Squall and Odin are evenly matched as they effortlessly parry each other attacks, neither opponent gaining an advantage over the other.*
Rich: ...So...Are we winning...?
Erik: I guess. But I'm still gonna have to go back to, "Where did these guys come from?"
Gary: Well, maybe we should ask Elec Man. Out of everyone here, he's the one who we really know.
Ben: ...In theory.
*Gary and Britt approaches Elec Man, as he fires another Thunder Beam.*
Gary: Hey Andon, Edward, whoever, glad to see you back in action! What're you and these other guys doing here?
*Elec Man fires a thunder beam at a surprised Gary*
Elecman: What asshole are you babbling about? I'm Leon! And stay the hell away from my bounty!
Gary: Huh? You're all bounty hunters?
Samus: *dodges a claw* Bounty hunters, mercs. A little here, a little there.
Britt: Either way, we could use the help!
Erik: And so could you if you wanna live to get paid!
Leon: Grrr...Fine. But if you start asking for a share of the pay, you die.
*Gary holds Scorpion in place with ice slashers as Leon weakens it with his thunder beam and Britt lobs a rolling cutter that slices his tail off. Samus screw attacks Pulzar, but he easily swats her aside. He then pins Samus and starts draining her energy, but Erik lifts the beetle up and flings it on its back as Rich blasts its stomach with a bomb. At the same time, Ben roasts Odin with fire storms as Squall summons Eden and who unleashes a blast of holy energy. However, Odin's still standing.*
Squall: What the hell?! You oughta be a smear on the ground by now!
Odin: You all sicken me. You don't even know what power really means. Do you realize what I'm capable of?
*Odin slashes Squall and Ben, knocking them prone*
Odin: With this blade, I can obliterate any living thing and consume their soul! Watch!
*Odin impales Squall on his Soul Reaver, blowing his body to pieces.*
Odin: This is the power I've always craved! The power you useless fools couldn't give me!
*Odin slashes at Ben, but he tumbles to one side and gets back up. He creates a sword of pure flames with his canon and engages Odin, but Odin easily parries everything Ben throws at him. Meanwhile...*
Samus: ...There goes the Bishie.
Leon: Screw him. The target's secure so, let's go and-
Scorpion: Oh please, you honestly think that's it all takes?
*Scorpion simply smiles as he grows another tail and swats Leon, Gary and Britt with a mental blast, slamming them into the wall. Meanwhile, Pulzar rights itself, opens his mouth and releases a probiscus that ensnares Samus, siphoning her energy.*
Scorpion: Ha! Your new allies are only making your deaths that much slower! Bring one or a million! *tosses the trio into the floor*
Gary: Change in plan! Leon, you oughta go help Samus battle Pulzar! You're the only one who can fry it with negative energy!
Leon: You don't come up to my waist, I ain't taking orders from you!
Britt: Besides, he'd fry Samus too! We gotta try something else!
Erik: We can handle this! You keep Scorpion busy! Rich, follow my lead.
*Erik and Rich leap into the air. Erik lands first and creates a massive shockwave, disorienting all the foes save Odin as Rich hangs from some chains.*
Odin: Pretty tricky there. But if a divine energy blast can't stop me did you really think that would?
Erik: I dunno. How about I show you some REAL power?
*As Ben keeps him busy, Erik turns into a bulldozer and slams head on into Odin, knocking the Soul Reaver out of his hands. Before he can recover it Rich quickly drops down and snatches it up.*
Ben: I'll do the honors!!
*Ben angrily wrenches the blade out of Rich's hands and slashes several gaping wounds into Odin's torso. Gasping, Odin collapses on the ground.*
Erik: Now for Phase Two!
*Erik grabs the Soul Reaver from Ben and stabs Pulzar with it. The beetle howls in angrily howls in pain a second before being blown to pieces.*
Scorpion: No! How could-
Ben: Odin was bragging this thing could destroy every living thing, including its soul! If that's not negative energy, I don't know what is!
*Scorpion blasts the heroes and mercs with telekinetic energy*
Scorpion: Well played, but futile. All you did was destroy two henchmen, leaving yourself at the mercy of an all-powerful being.
Leon: Get over yourself. God.
*Leon dodges a barrage of lasers and stabs Scorpion with his severed tail, injecting him with his own poison.*
Rich: Geez, that was close. Too close!
Britt: Y'know, even though Odin turned on us, I feel kinda bad for him.
Ben: He made his call. It was him or us.
Britt: Yeah, but I didn't want it to end like this. Traitor or no, he was our friend.
Gary: *puts his hand on her shoulder* Trust me, I know how you feel. Lord knows, I didn't want to go through this again. Not after Edward. But I'm betting everyone else here will stay with us til the bitter end.
Erik: You know it!
Leon: Yeah, yeah. Dust to ashes and all that crap. Now I can get paid and-
Samus: *puts her gun to Leon's head* No, I'M getting paid!
Leon: Oh for the love of...Look, I know you're still mad at me for those couple dozen Roofie incidents, but-
Samus: Ohhh...that's just the tip of the iceberg, bucko! Truth is: I'm tired of not being paid for all the shit I do for this god-forsaken universe! I've saved it from Metroids, Space Pirates, Ing, and X parasites, and how often have I been paid for this crap?! Once, tops? No, I think I owe it to myself to actually KEEP the bounty I'm promised!
Leon: Well you can! As soon as I get my cut!
Samus: Look, I'm about to let the universe get taken over by the next sticky, icky thing if I don't get some REAL pay pronto! You were bitching that you weren't getting paid enough for this job! Now you don't have to worry about that! On that note, I'm outta here!
*Samus jumps through the skylight with Scorpion slumped over her shoulder*
Leon: Grrrr... I shouldn't have to track down her bitchy ass for some chump change.
Erik: Then don't. We need another member, and I think you'd fit in (more or less). What do you say?
Leon: Beats me. How much are you willing to pay?
Ben: ...We'll talk about that later.
Gary: In the meantime, we'll set up a room for you in our mansion.
Leon: Mansion?! This job intrigues me, and I wish to learn more.
Britt: *smiles* Oh you will.
Rich: In the meantime, how about you regale us with a few of those Roofie incidents?
Leon: Oh man, this one time...
*meanwhile, outside the factory, Samus is about to board her ship with Scorpion in tow*
Samus: *singing* Grey skies are gonna clear up! Put on a happy face!
*just as Samus enters her ship, Scorpion's eyes fly open and he jabs her with her stinger.*
Scorpion: I of course have an immunity to my own poison! I am NOT a moron! It's not as strong as I first thought, but it does the job!
*As Samus hits the ground like a sack of potatoes, Scorpion takes off in Samus's ship*
Scorpion: You fools haven't won, if that's what you're thinking. I'll be back to finish what I started!