Narrator: It's another day at S6 HQ, when Torchman wakes everyone up bright and early to rant about his latest "plan".
Torchman: .... and we follow that by BEHEADING TOPMAN!
Sharkman: Hellz yeah!
Oilman: Oh, for the love of .... you still haven't explained how we actually manage to trap the 'Maniacs?
Oilman: And you still haven't got back to me on exactly what you hope to gain by destroying them.
Torchman: What we hope to gain!? Gentlemen - fill the recolor in!
Bitman: Their stuff.
Waveman: People will know we're better than they are, duh.
Sharkman: Their weed! Doood! LARGE FREAKIN' WEED!
Torchman: You see?
Bitman: Yeah, even dumpy gets it!
Waveman: Who's .....? oh.
Torchman: YES! For I am mighty! And under my guidance we will -
??: FAIL MISERABLY! Again.
Torchman: WHO DARES!?
Dynaman: We do.
Voltman: Looks like it's the same as it ever was ...
Sharkman: WRONG! We got ourselves a new member!
Oilman: No. We don't.
Sharkman: Hunh? Oh, right. Yeah, I guess it's kinda .... the same around here.
Voltman: Yeah. We noticed.
Bitman: So you guys are back. For how long this time?
Sonicman: Long enough to make some much-needed changes!
Torchman: BAH! My way is the most perfect - !
Voltman: ARRRRGH! Stop ranting! That's why we left in the first place!
Torchman: And left is what you should have remained!
Crorq: Have I been introduced yet?
Crorq: Oh, damn it.
Dynaman: Good going, Crorq. You totally ruined the surprise.
(The humungous robot Crorq lumbers inside S6 base.)
Crorq: You took too long!
Sonicman: We were trying to build suspence.
Crorq: Well, you failed!
Bitman: Aw, man. Crorq.
Sharkman: Didn't we drop you from a cliff?
Crorq: Yes. You did. And it hurt!
Blademan: How'd you get better from that?
Sonicman: We spent months rebuilding him.
Blademan: Why'd you do that?
Dynaman: Because we wanna rule the world! We'll push this team to greatness despite your incompotence!
Torchman: So the snake has bitten its own tail!
Torchman: Your true faces are at last revealed!
Crorq: Okay, just stop talking now.
Bitman: *groan* we wish.
Crorq: You WILL OBEY ME!
(Crorq exerts his will and the Six fall to their knees!)
Oilman: Oh, I hate this crap!
Waveman: Since when can Crorq control us?
Oilman: Since ALWAYS! That's why it was so tough dumping him off that cliff!
Crorq: And thank you for reminding me!
(Crorq exerts his influence and the six writhe in pain!)
the Six: *writhes in pain*!
Waveman: How .... how could I have forgotten this?
Bitman: 'cuz yer a dough boy with a head filled with slush.
(Yet another wave of pain is exerted on the six!)
the six: GWAHH!!
Sharkman: *wiggles an obscene gesture*
Voltman: You'll just get more of the same until you co-operate.
the six: *groan*
(A few hours later .....)
Crorq: WHERE IS MY DINNER!?
Oilman: It's .... taking a while ....
Crorq: Damn it, damn it, damn it! I am hungry now! And I want my dinner now! Hurry up!
Oilman: Damn you!
(Crorq sends a wave of pain as he forces Oilman back to work.)
Oilman: AHHH!! Damn it! (Oilman is forced back to his task.
Torchman: You will rue this - GWAHH!
Torchman: I will not stay silent - GAHH!!
Crorq: Quiet already!
Torchman: You can't do this to me - GAHH!!
Crorq: I did, now quiet!
Torchman: You'll regret - GAHH!
Crorq: Shut it!
Torchman: Grrrr .... you won't silence me so easily!
Crorq: Apparently not.
Torchman: I built this place! I - HEY! Don't make me walk away from you!
(Torchman struggles with Crorq's control as he walks out of the room.)
Torchman: COWARD! COWARD!
(Torchman is beyond earshot.)
Crorq: FINALLY! Now if only Oilman would finish up with my food....
(A few hours later ....)
Crorq: (while gorging himself) Sonicman! report!
Sonicman: (over the radio) It's like you said. There's more than enough leftover parts to make the giant robot!
Crorq: Oh course! My supercomputer brain computed this as one of the largest untapped resources in Megalopolis!
Sonicman: Don't you mean "Monsteropolis", sir?
Crorq: Don't correct me! My genius said MEGALOPOLIS!
Sonicman: Right. Sorry, sir.
(Oilman walks in with a drink)
Oilman: Here's your drink.
Crorq: *grabs the drink and guzzles it down*
Crorq: *gags and spits the drink on the floor*!
Crorq: I said I wanted cherry cola! Not this black cherry vanilla crap!
Oilman: I told you, it's been discontinued! I - AAARGH!
Crorq: Then find it!
Oilman: I can't - ARGH!
Crorq: When I say I want Cherry Coke I want Cherry Coke! If I wanted this vanilla crap I would have asked for it.
Oilman: But - ARGH!
Crorq: This is the sort of garbage that gets you ranked dead last among the forces of evil. Now, I want you to travel as far and for as long as it takes ..... UNTIL YOU FIND ME MY DAMNED CHERRY COKE!
Oilman: DAMN! *Oilman is forced out on his journey by Crorq*
(At the same time Blademan struggles walks into the room, summoned by Crorq's will.)
Blademan: Grrr .... What do you want?
Crorq: You'll clean that mess up.
(Crors mentally forces Blade to get cleaning products and in short order, Blade is on his hands and knees fighting the stain on the carpet.)
Blademan: Dirty little ....
Crorq: And SMILE as you do it! I know all! And I demand it!
(Blademan grins madly under his mask, very much against his will.)
(A few days later....)
Dynaman: Oil still hasn't come back yet.
Crorq: He better not. Not until he's found some Cherry Coke.
Sonicman: Damn straight.
Crorq: Now .... where are my chicken wings!?
Sharkman: (pokes his head from out of the kitchen) Dood. I ..... went through a bunch of packets. I'm really not good at cooking.
Crorq: STOP MAKING EXCUSES AND DO IT!
Sharkman: GUY! I dunno how, yo!
Crorq: Do it! My super brain commands you to do it!
Sharkman: Aw ... !@#$!!!! WEAK!
(Sharkman yet again tries to make chicken wings, under Crorq's control).
Crorq: I need my chicken wings, damn it.
Voltman: Uh .... may I point out that you are a robot and therefore -
Crorq: NO YOU MAY NOT!
Voltman: Yes, sir!
Crorq: General Dynaman! How goes the giant robot?
Dynaman: I'm a general now?
Crorq: My superior intelligence deems it so.
Crorq: Yes, it is so. Now ... the robot?
Dynaman: Proceeding smoothly!
Crorq: Excellent .... all is in readiness.
Torchman: *struggles to rant*
Crorq: HAH! Yes, I finally got ahold of your speech centers.
Torchman: *struggles to respond*
Crorq: Oh ho ho ho. Now .... if only I had chicken wings and cherry coke this would be perfect ....
(One day later.)
Crorq: IT IS COMPLETE!!
(Before them stands a giant Garbageman. The six, minus Oil, are collapsed in exhaustion.)
Crorq: Good. Work. Team.
Blademan: We .... did ...
Crorq: *forces Blade silent*
Crorq: And now ..... for the next order of buisness. We kill the Mechs!
Sonicman: I thought you wanted to get away from all that crap.
Crorq: The world will forever associate our team with failure unless we finish the job these losers started.
Waveman: Now hold - nnnngh.
Crorq: *forces Wave silent*
Voltman: As always Crorq is right.
Dynaman: That sort of thinking is why Crorq's the super computer.
Crorq: Of course even super computers need food ..... damn it! Where's Sharkman!?
(Crorq mentally summons Sharkman, and the robot master comes out warily with a tray full of burnt-up chicken wings.)
Crorq: What is this!?
Sharkman: I .... I can't cook, man!
(Crorq knocks the tray onto the floor.)
Crorq: You will be punished later. But now we must go and ...... destroy the Mechs!
(The entire battle need not be recorded. However, a small sample shall be shown as an example.)
Crorq: I SAID PUNCH TO YOUR LEFT! YOUR LEFT!!
Blademan: I thought you meant my left!
Crorq: I meant the other left!
Dynaman: We're taking damage to the rear!
Crorq: Fire the garbage lazer!
Blademan: The power's not high enough for that!
Crorq: What!? Bitman!!
Bitman: (plugged into several outlets) I'm ..... not .... a .... battery! I just don't got ....
Crorq: We need more power!
Bitman: Ahhhh ..... screw you, Crorq!
Crorq: You dare!?
Blademan: We're getting hit!
Crorq: Then dodge! Veer backwards!
Sonicman: We're having a hard time co-ordinating the walking, Crorq. I don't think that's a good idea.
Waveman: It's a terrible idea.
Crorq: VEER TO THE BACK, I SAID!
(And, so..... the S6 returns to the base... all walking somberly into the dump on foot...)
Crorq: THAT WAS TERRIBLE!
the Six ('cept for the muted Torch and Oil): Yes, Crorq.
Crorq: You couldn't even follow simple instructions!
the Six: Yes, Crorq.
Crorq: And I'm hungry, damn it! I'm the guest and you've been nothing but horrible to me! I'm the guest, damn it!
the Six: *groan*
Crorq: Well .... under my guidance the Demonic Ten will rise again! And we'll beat those damned Mechs.
(At this Torch snaps!)
Torchman: *ggff* *gurk* *Nkkk* NOOOOOO!!!!!
Torchman: We are now and forever the Sinister Six!
Crorq: There's ten of us now, you idiot! People will just think you can't count.
Torchman: You were never invited!
Crorq: I don't care!
Torchman: I don't care that you don't care! For - GKKKK!!!
(Crorq exerts control once again over the verbose Torchman.)
Crorq: Clearly new blood is needed. And ..... I believe I know of just the solution..... In fact, it's already been prepared!
Crorq: Indeed. Allow me to teleport in...
(Several figures teleport in. They stand eerily still, it's obvious they have not been activated yet.)
Crorq: YOUR REPLACEMENTS!
Bitman: Fer once I'm with Shark. What the hell is this, Crorq!?
Crorq: You're incompotent. All of you! But .... who is billed as the Mechanical Maniac's greatest villain?
Crorq: No, not us, that's why I'm here, you twit. Bizarro Shadowman is hailed as their greatest villain!
Sharkman: I was gonna guess that!
Crorq: And considering all evil doubles share esteem, I have decided evil doubles of you would make perfect villains!
Torchman: But Bizarros behave in the opposite from the original they were cloned from. Obviously these ..... things will do the same! Your plan has a fatal flaw!
Crorq: If I had hands, I would smack you.
Waveman: But you have us!
Crorq: Pathetic failures all. It's time to activate the Bizarros!
(Voltman flips a switch. The Bizarros' eyes light up.)
Crorq: Now ...... finally ....
B. Torchman: BRAIN!
B. Bitman: BRAINS!
B. Waveman: BRAINS!
B. Oil: Buh-buh- BRAINS!!!
(The Bizarros advance on the group of robots.)
Sonicman: What the Hell!? Crorq! Bizarros aren't damned zombies!
Crorq: I know what Bizarros are!
Sonicman: I don't think you do!
Crorq: You dare -
B. Blademan: BRAINS!!!!!
Voltman: Uhhh .... Crorq?
Crorq: No problem! I'll just order them to ...
(The Bizarros continue to advance.)
Crorq: To ....
B. Torchman: NEED BRAINS!
Bitman: You sure do.
B. Sharkman: BRAINS!!!!!!
Crorq: They .... I can't get to them.
Voltman: Then ...
B. Blademan: BRAINS!!!!!!!
This epilogue was never finished. Nor will it ever be finished! So, don't bug me about it! The ending shall forever remain GONE!!!