(The scene opens with the Mechanical Maniacs eating their breakfast. They're all eating Energon Cubes, except for Needleman who is enjoying his oatmeal! They are now watching the news hoping to see some free publicity...)
Gemini: Free publicity is always good! We advertise, but we pay nothing!
Gauntlet: I dunno...If people see us on the news, they might actually hire us...
Gauntlet: So, if we're hired, we might actually have to do some real work. I don't think I'm up for that.
Magnet:...We need work for money to buy things. Like electricity and food.
Gauntlet: (Whipping out a device) But we can have free money with my handy Counterfeit Money Machine!
Top: (Grabs the machine and breaks it.) We're honest robots here!
Gauntlet: HEY!! That was hard to make!
Snake: Hey guys, shut up and listen to this!
TV News Lady: -and so it seems the identity of the new Sinister Six is in question. With their Decepticon allegiances revealed, new evidence of three stolen cars, and the original Sinister Six being found by Spybreak, the new Mega Man 3 Team is in trouble! The Sinister Six's leader, Gutsman makes a comment:
Tim (Gutsman): We'd never give over the team to these losers! They jumped us and locked us in the basement of Mega Land for weeks until Spybreak found us and set us free!
Snakeman: Dammit! I knew we forgot to do something...
Tim (Gutsman): We're suing these goons fer copyright infringement!
TV News Lady: There is even doubt whether these Mega Man 3 PC robots are the real Mega Man 3 robots at all! We managed to get a comment from Shadowman of the illustrious Mega Man 3 team...
(Everybody looks at Shadowman.)
Gauntlet: I have no idea what she's talking about! Really!
TV News Lady: ...The Elite Eight!
(The Mechanical Maniacs groan.)
Shadowman (Elite Eight): I have never seen these guys before in my life! Still, I guess I'll accept this reward money...
(The Mechanical Maniacs groan louder.)
Shadowman (Elite Eight): Well, all I know is that we're the REAL Mega Man 3 Team! Not these losers and not the Mechanical Maniacs!!
TV News Lady: The who?
(The Mechanical Maniacs groan even louder.)
Spark: I don't think I can take this...
Shadowman (Elite Eight): Uh...never mind!
TV News Lady: The Sinister Six were heard talking in their cell. Here is what we at Channel 6 overheard!
Torch: Some heroes we turned out to be...can't even destroy one stupid Mega Man Team...
Shark: (Points to TV) Look!
Some Lady: Torchman good! Sinister Six save children!
Torch: I don't believe it.
Shark: Well, believe it! Because of something we did by accident, we'll become household names!
Oil: Maybe then, the people of the world will gather 'round and crush Cossack's Creations!
Bit: I wouldn't count on it though...
TV News Lady: And they go on like that for hours...Despite the strong burden of proof against them, the Sinister Six has hired lawyer Johnnie Cochran, and that just throws the entire system out the window!
Spark: Who's Johnnie Cochran?
Top: The lawyer that got OJ off.
Everyone Else: Ah!
TV News Lady: In other news, it has been noted that the once popular website, Megaman: The Man in Blue is no more. It has been noticed that a lot of the-
(Gemini turns the TV off.)
Gemini: Did you hear that? The Man in Blue is gone!
Gemini: You know what this means?
Top: ...Um, no.
Gemini: IT MEANS ALL OF THEIR SECRETS ARE OURS FOR THE LOOTING!
Everyone Else: YEAH!!!!
Magnet: Maybe they even have one of Gamma's elements!!
Hard: Well, I should say that is a bit of a stretch.
(Everybody looks in surprise!)
Hard: Ah, you are all wondering why I now have a vocabulary despite nobody filling the Hardman position on the Team. That is a reasonable concern. Allow me to illuminate. Our founder, the great Skullman, asked his creator Doctor Cossack to install within my frame some form of intelligence so that I will no longer resemble his own Team's mute member, Dustman. Doctor Cossack enjoyed the challenge quite thoroughly and the intelligence he coded for me is substantially advanced compared to the average modern robot!
Hard: That should suffice, let us all be off then! We shall claim the treasures that lie within the buried confines of the Man in Blue's webpage!
Hard: Oh bother...if I must say it...then Mechanical Maniacs...UNITE!
(Magnetman and Sparkman combine their powers to create a huge flash of light! The team teleports to the remains of the homepage.)
Gauntlet: Woah! This place is a mess!
Top: Well, everybody get scroungin', we don't have all day!
(The Maniacs scrounge...)
Snake: Damn! I used my Search Snakes and still came up with nadda! It's like somebody already went through all of this stuff...
Stranger: Somebody did...
The Maniacs: GASP!!
(In front of them stands the quintessential Mega Man villain...DOCTOR WILY!!!!!)
Hardman: Wily! You dastardly cur! What have you done with this once-glorious website?
Wily: An excellent question, Hardman...As you all know, there is an insane influx of new MM Teams...These Teams were once part of my own robot empire!! I plan on using this gigantic mondo-satellite to reprogram them to obey only me once more!
Gauntlet: But why build it here!?
Wily: Well, although the Man in Blue was once a mighty homepage, it fell into decline as new pages arose. The things it once had could no longer compete in the new Megaman community and so it fell! However, I managed to salvage much from the remains. It all started with the death of the Megaman Maniacs and spread onto Generation Megaman X, the first Megaman X webpage ever made! Since that time, I have been collecting components from each webpage, harmless on their own, but lethal when combined!! After Pixelboy and now the Man in Blue, my satellite is nearing completion!!
Wily: As I said, the Man in Blue fell...and it lost its once-respected position in the Megaman elite...I came here because I thought NO ONE WOULD COME HERE!
Gemini: Well, you're obviously wrong!
Wily: Am I...? The page has been gone for quite some time, but almost no one noticed...why? Because no one came! And you are the only people to come here now!
Mysterious Figure: I dunno about that!!!!
Spark: It's Groovy Kat!!!
Groovy Kat: Yeah! I learned of your plan long ago, and checked on what remains of my old webpage...AND FOUND MY CAR MISSING!!
Groovy Kat: I LOVED THE GROOVIN' MOBILE!!! IT HAD LEATHER SEATS AND GREAT STEERING!! I WILL GET MY REVENGE!!
Wily: But...I have not raided your homepage yet...I plan to, but I have not yet...
Groovy Kat: Really?
Gauntlet: Don't believe him, Groovy! That's Doc Wily!
Groovy Kat: Um...don't mean to be rude or anything, but...who are you guys?
(The Mechanical Maniacs groan once more.)
Needle: We're the best Mega Man 3 Team, the Mechanical Maniacs!
Groovy Kat: Groovy. Now Wily, give me back my damn car!
Wily: But why would I even steal your car? Granted, it's "cool" and all with leather interior and cupholders, but it's not really necessary.
Groovy Kat: Then you didn't steal my car?
Wily: Umm, nope.
Groovy Kat: Then who...?
Gauntlet: DON'T BELIEVE HIM!!!!! THAT'S DOCTOR WILY, DAMNIT, OF COURSE HE'S GONNA LIE!!!!
Wily: But why would I only steal his car??
Groovy Kat: Alright, now I'm confused...
Other Guy: Who the hell cares!? Let's just KILL ALL OF 'EM!!
The Good Guys: Huh!?
(Sigma and Megaman Juno appear out of nowhere to challenge our heroes.)
Sigma: Think Galvatron was hard? Now face ALL THREE OF US!!
Wily: THAT'S RIGHT! WE'RE THE ANTI-MEGAMAN TEAM!!
Magnet: This whole "Team" thing has gotten WAY out of hand...
Juno: Perhaps you would all like to join us. Reading your webpage does say that you all want to rule the world...why not join us and eradicate all human life?
Wily: HEY!!!! We discussed RELOCATION!!
Snake: Well, he does have a point...
Needle: ARE YOU KIDDIN'!? JOIN WILY!? NO WAY!!
Hard: We must decline your offer! Our plans for conquest are of a more personal nature...
Magnet: Oh, here we go...
Hard: You self-serving tyrants will only turn on each other in the end and leave this fair mother earth in total ruin. Our goals are not one and the same. Our trusted fellowship seeks to reunite the lost elements of the super-robot Gamma and when we finally conquer the globe with its power, we shall make an utopian paradise where all living creatures shall live together in peace and tranquil splendor. Would we deem to leave ourselves vulnerable to your schemes, Sigma would likely infect us with the Maverick Virus, robbing us of our free will under your subjugation. We would never make such a suicidal, incompetent move.
Juno: A pity...Well Groovy Kat, Wily did not steal your car, rather Shadowman over there did.
(Groovy Kat turns to Gauntlet, enraged.)
Groovy Kat: What!?! You!?!?
Juno: Moreover, his actions brought about its destruction in a battle with Bitman and Galvatron.
(Groovy Kat attacks, but Gauntlet teleports away! Groovy Kat follows.)
Sigma: Now it's just you...AND US!!!
(The Anti-Megaman Team attacks the rest of the Mechanical Maniacs!)
Hard: Fear not, comrades! The various incarnations of the Blue Bomber faced each of these blackguards single-handedly and emerged victorious! Surely with our combined strength, we too can win!
(The other Mechanical Maniacs run.)
(The Anti-Megaman team chases after them!)
Sigma: Get 'em!
Wily: They won't get away!!!
(Wily shoots a fireball from his capsule, knocking all the Maniacs down!)
Hard: Have at you!
(Hardman launches his Hard Knuckles, the Anti-Team is not hurt much.)
Hard: ... (Runs away too.)
(All three villains blow the Maniacs away with their combined powers!)
Spark: Mother of...
Hard: This is not the end...In my brief existence as a sentient being I have come to understand what it means to bear a soul. Although you may destroy our bodies...our spirits will live on!
Juno: Your melodrama is misappropriated. We will not destroy you. Sigma will merely infect you, turning you all into our loyal servants.
(Sigma begins by linking with Hardman and he begins to infect him...)
Magnet: Hey! Leave him alone!
(Suddenly, a ray of energy envelops the villains!)
Juno and Sigma: AAAHHHHRRRGGGG!!
(Gauntlet and Groovy Kat stand atop the mondo-satellite.)
Gauntlet: We settled our differences and used what was left of Groovy's site to finish the satellite!
Groovy: And now YOU GUYS ARE LOBOTOMIZED!!
(Sigma and Juno float in a stupor while Wily is caught in a machine he cannot control. The mondo-satellite then explodes from the stress!)
Gemini: Good riddance! No one should have that kind of power...
Snake: Speak for yourself!
Groovy Kat: Well, I'll be sure to visit you guys!
Groovy Kat: No. Not really.
Needle: Wait! How'd you and Gauntlet patch things up?
Groovy Kat: He paid me $200,000 in damages.
Everyone Else: GASP!
Groovy Kat: Well, later!
(Groovy teleports away.)
Magnet: How in the hell?
Gauntlet: Life is always good when you have a (whips out device) Counterfeit Money Machine!
Top: Gimme that.
(Top grabs the machine and breaks it again.)
(Wily is sent to jail and the Maniacs get some much-needed butlers!)
Snake: Ahhhhhhhh, having a Sigma-butler and a Juno-butler is soooo convenient!
Needle: Sigma's beginning to piss me off though! He's still out there fixing the roof!
Gauntlet: Huh, Hard hasn't said a word since the battle. YO! HARD! YOU IN THERE BUDDY?
Gauntlet: Our Hardman is back!
Everyone Else: HOORAY!!
Snake: Well, I guess things turned out alright...
Magnet: I guess...
Needle: And we learned something today too...
Gauntlet: Did we? I'm beginning to wonder...
Needle: We learned that it's great just being yourself! When Hardman was like this, he didn't make much conversation, but when he was reprogrammed he was such an ass! So we must accept him for himself.
Gauntlet: But what if he had the personality of Will Smith?
Top: Well, until that happens, we are...The Mechanical Maniacs!
Edit on Feb 14/2001: Well, time makes fools of us all, no? This epilogue is a bit outdated. In fact, many pages have come back from the dead since this was written, and it's only fair that I list them here.
Sean as .....
Jacob as .....
Anton as .....
Nobody as .....
C.J. as .....
Gizmo as .....
Titanium 91 as .....
Gauntlet as .....