By: Nightmare (aka Topman)
We join our heroes at the Sinister Six base, where the Mechanical Maniacs have the base to themselves that day, as the Six have gone to fight... I dunno, some badguy. After having taken the spare weapons from the Sinister Six's rooms to use for their next caper, they get a message that Gauntlet has assembled everyone to the Lounge to tell them all something very important.
Gauntlet: Ah, my friends and teammates. I don't need to remind you all that yesterday was that beautiful day that only comes once a year!
Needle: Your birthday?
Gauntlet: Guess again!
Gemini: ... Halloween?
Gauntlet: No, sillies! It's the Superbowl! It only comes once a year, and yesterday was that glorious, magical evening where I get pissed drunk and bet all my savings on a random team.
Snake: You bet ALL OUR SAVINGS?!
Needle: There was over a million bucks in there!
Top: Gauntlet, you idiot!
Gauntlet: I won.
Top: Gauntlet, you genius!
All: We're rich!!!
Gauntlet: I'm sorry, my dear friends, but I can't let you have any of it.
Snake: What's the big cheese about it Gauntlet? Why not!?
Gauntlet: Well, you see, my friends.... big cheese? Anyway, I've learned that lately, well, you've been trying to kill me.
Hard: How rude! Murder is so... improper!
Gemini: Proposterous! I challenge you to a duel for even suggesting this!
Magnet: Yeah, come on! I mean... wait, what are we talking about? You know absent-minded me, I tend to forget.
Needle: Come on, dear brother. *twirls her hair* We're all friends, here, right? Can't you just give us a little wittle bit of that pretty money?
Snake: Yeah, Gauntlet, give us the damned money! I want money! I'll hurt you!
Spark: You know I could always use a bit more on my paycheck! And none of us would EVER hurt you!
Gauntlet: I have all your attempted murders and robberies on video tape.
*all are shocked*
Gauntlet: So none of you get anything. Top, can I see you in the other room?
Both walk into the kitchen.
Top: Yes Gauntlet? What did you want to tell me?
Gauntlet: Well, lately I've been very worried. You see, the others have been very... well, insane, lately, and I fear that they're going to murder me for having the money.
Top: Then why did you tell them?
Gauntlet: ...I'm really not sure. Pretty stupid actually. Anyways, I know that I can always trust you. I need you, as the reader... I mean, as a friend, to follow them around and make sure nothing bad happens to me. And, if anything unfortunate SHOULD happen to me, you can use the clues to figure out who it is. Can I trust you?
Top: ... I'm sorry? I wasn't listening...
That evening when everyone is presumed to be sleeping...
Spark: Now that all are presumed to be sleeping, I can sneak downstairs, where that bastard employer of mine's bedroom is. I'll then sneak in, and sneak up to his bed, and, sneakily mind you, hit him with this elemental weapon I picked up from one of the Sinister Six's chambers.
Shadowy figure: I can hear every word you're saying!
Spark: Oh, uh, hi Snake!
Snake: Listen, dough-head. Here's the deal. You go in with me, split the loot 60/40, or I tell ol' Gaunty about your whole backstabbing plan.
Spark: Damn you Snake, you win. You first.
Snake starts walking on, when suddenly he's hit by Spark's weapon, is singed, and falls to the ground. Spark puts down his elemental weapon, takes Snakes non-elemental projectile weapon and moves ahead.
Shadowy figure 1: Hmmm. Now that I have this non-projectile weapon, it's time to go to... where am I going again?
Shadowy figure 2: I say, not remembering is so rude!
Shadowy figure 1: Oh, it's you. Say, what's that over there?
Shadowy figure 2: You're not fooling me! *electrocutes Shadowy figure 1 with elemental weapon* You thought I'd look so that you could hit me with that special arm of yours. Well, I don't even want that crude, unsanitary weapon... I'll keep my... *gets singed and falls*
Gemini: He wasn't joking when he said to watch out. But I'm out of my weapon, so I think I'll take your nice elemental weapon for my own. Now, off to Gauntlet's room!
We arrive at Gauntlet's room to find...
Gauntlet: Well, it's time to go to precious, precious sleep. Good night, beautiful money. Good night, incriminating video tape. *goes to sleep*
Shadowy figure A: Ah, brother dear. Sweet dreams. For they will be... your last! For with this weapon I have, I will kill you and take the money, and the tape!
Shadowy figure B: You will not! I WILL!
Shadowy figure C: No! It'll be me who gets the money!!!
There is a struggle, and finally, the one who had a non-elemental weapon is knocked out. The remaining two hear Gauntlet starting to wake up. Startled, the one with Ice Slasher tries to run away, but hits their head on a chandelier. The last one conscious fires their weapon and hits Gauntlet, killing him.
The next morning...
Top: You all think I was on vacation in Gwadamala yesterday... if that's even how you spell it.
Spark: You weren't?!?!
Top: No. Now, one of you killed Gauntlet and took the money, and I'm sure none of you will fess up to it. That's why I've put together the clues, and deduced that one of you here is the murderer. I also know which weapon Gauntlet was killed with.
Needle: Well, I never would have killed my dear brother.
Hard: Really now, accusations are so rude.
Gemini: This is all poppycock!
Top: Quiet! It is time to reveal the horrible truth about this horrid murder. The murderer and weapon are...
Suddenly Gauntlet wakes up in a sweat.
Gauntlet: Huh?! It was all a dream! But it seemed so real....
Snake: Well, I guess everything turned out all right.
Needle: And we learned something too!
Gauntlet: How did I manage to learn something as I was dreaming?
Needle: We learned that you should not eat Chili-tacos before going to sleep, or you'll have nightmares.
Top: Well, until Gauntlet dreams about being charitable...
Gauntlet: God, PLEASE don't put THAT image in my head!
Top: ... we are... the MECHANICAL MANIACS!!!
(Oh, for those who were wondering, it would have been Gemini Man with Thunder Beam, had it really happened.)
|Musashiden Razz as .....||
|Hexlaser as .....||
|Psycho Magnet as .....||
|Hadrian Howell as .....||
|Nightmare as .....||
|Lennon as .....||
|Jonathan S. as .....||
|Gauntlet as .....||