By: Nightmare (aka Topman)
At the Courthouse
Bailiff: All rise for the honorable Judge MicMacentire.
Gemini: *laughing all too loudly* What a stupid name!
*everyone turns around*
Needle: Nice going you idiot!
Judge: *bangs gavel* This court will now come to order. Will the lawyer for the opposition party please stand?
Lawyer: *stands up* Your honour.
Needle: *whispering* Gauntlet, our lawyer didn't show up!
Gauntlet: *whispering* Nightmare, where is he?!
Top: *whispering* He's right here!
Gauntlet: *whispering* Where?!
Top: *whispering* Well, I figured we were in enough financial trouble already, we didn't need to spend extra money on a lawyer. So I studied law books all night and...
Spark: This can't be good...
Top: *whispering* I'll be representing us!
Gemini: We're doomed.
Hard: Hello prison.
Gauntlet: *bangs his head on the table*
Judge: *bangs gavel* Silence in the court! Will the lawyer for the defensive party please stand?
Magnet: Nightmare, you stand up and I'll...
Top: *stands up* Your horror... I mean your honour!!!
Needle: *whispers* Oh yeah, this is turning out sooo well.
Judge: Well, now I'd like to hear both of your opening statements. Opposition party?
Lawyer: Your honour, we have clear and undeniable evidence that these... miscreants... are guilty of all of the charges put against them. Our city will not rest until they are punished accordingly.
Alright. Now, the defensive party?
Top: Your Amish... I mean your Honour... I think I speak for all of us in this court...
*everyone glares at him*
Top: ...when I say that this town can shove it up their-
Top: I'm sorry, Judge, what was I thinking? That's the last time I'll eat 32 consecutive tacos, I can tell you that. Now where was I? Oh yes. Judge, I can assure you that we have committed no crimes. *comes up to judge and whispers* And my friend Mr. Check-for-a-hundred-dollars says so too...
Spark: This is getting worse and worse.
Judge: Mr. Nightmare, if you continue to act with such reckless abandonment of moral code, I will have to shock you seventeen times with this taser gun. Please sit down. We will hear from the opposition first.
Top: *mumbles* Stupid jerk...
Lawyer: Your honour, I would like to present Exhibit A. It is a ziploc bag full of money, which we obtained from their 'secret base', as they like to call it. It is clear that nobody would have such amounts of money without obtaining it illegally, or by having a very high-paying job. And the latter is highly unplausible.
Lawyer: Exhibit B. Photographic evidence of footprints from a large robotic behemoth of sorts coming out of the bank on the day of the robbery. We did a cross-check analysis, and it matches the footprints of one Man, Hard, belonging to said 'team'. More evidence of their assistance in the bank robbery.
Magnet: We're doomed...
Lawyer: Finally, exhibit C. This is a photograph of one "Unknown comma Gauntlet" standing next to the bank holding the sack of money that was stolen.
Gauntlet: WHAT?! That was from my Christmas party last year, but I wasn't holding a sack of money, I was holding a stocking! ... and I'm pretty sure I wasn't outside the bank neither.
Spark: I dunno man, Hardman made some weeeird Egg Nog, I don't think any of us were all too clear of what was and wasn't a bank...
Hard: I owned a bar, I didn't know how to make anything without alcohol!
Judge: Not another word out of any of you! This photo is clear, this man was responsible for the bank robbery, and you are all accomplices. I will hear no further-
???: STOP THE PRESSES!
Mr. and Mrs. Press stop what they were doing.
Judge: What is it NOW?!
Gauntlet: Hey! It's Raj!
Raijin: Don't you EVER call me that again. *slaps Gauntlet across the face*
Gauntlet: *rubbing face* Ow!
Raijin: Your honour, this is a sham! Robots don't have specific footprints, so those 'Hard Man' footprints could have been made by anything with a large metallic side in the shape of a foot, or even another large robot. And the photo, if you look closely, has tiny white pixels around Gauntlet, indicating that the photo was created by copying Gauntlet's purloined Christmas card photo and pasting it onto a background of the bank.
Judge: By god, you're right! But then, if they didn't steal from the bank, who did? And who tampered with the evidence?
Top: Your... hooonnnn...oooor...
Gemini: Holy crap, he got it right!
Top: Although I don't have the answer to that question, there may be a place that does. Follow me!
Top: You see, your... majesty...
Spark: *smack his head*
Top: We take note of all of the interesting stuff that goes on in our lives. So, let's just read on... AHA! The Mayor gave Eric money for defeating the evil Doc Robot. So, it must have been the Mayor who sabotaged us!
Judge: That doesn't make sense. Our mayor is a very good man!
Raijin: ... IT WAS SNAKEMAN!
Gauntlet: Uh... yeah! Don't blame us! We had nothing to do with it! If it wasn't the mayor, it must have been Snakeman!!
Judge: Alright, I'm convinced. Take the slimy, slithery, scoundrel Snakeman and send him to the Slammer! Ooh, alliteration.
After everyone is gone except the Mechs (save Snake) and Raijin...
Raijin: I'm sorry I had to do that, but I knew the judge would never believe that the mayor would do something like that, so someone had to take the fall.
Needle: But why did you get Snakeman to take the hit?
Raijin: He was evil.
Raijin: Well, okay. I just didn't like him. He gave me this look one time, and... well, we never really got off on a good start.
Needle: Well, I guess we learned something today.
Gauntlet: Yeah... I learned that...
Needle: SHUT UP! I'M TALKING. We learned that, according to this epilogue, all court systems consist of clipart men or poorly drawn characters.
Gemini: True that.
Gauntlet: Well, Raj, I guess we owe you one.
Raijin: You could stop calling me Ra-
Gauntlet: Gee, man, I don't know how to make it up to you.
Magnet: Hey Gauntlet, we need a new Snakeman, don't we?
Gauntlet: Yeah, we do... HEY! I just got a great idea! We owe Raj a favour, and we don't have a Snakeman... So I propose... we go out on a search for a Snakeman, and on the way we treat Raijin to dinner!
Top: Well, until Gauntlet learns to put two and two together...
Gauntlet: ... five?
Top: We are... the MECHANICAL MANIACS!
|Musashiden Razz as .....||
|Hexlaser as .....||
|Psycho Magnet as .....||
|Hadrian Howell as .....||
|Nightmare as .....||
|Lennon as .....||
|Jonathan S. as .....||
|Gauntlet as .....||