Series 4 Issue # 5 - Evil Is as Evil Does

With the last of Cossack's Creations destroyed, the Maniacs were all ready to battle the Doctor himself! However, a surprising twist of events has found the Doctor Cossack lying dead on the ground ..... with a Shadowblade stuck firmly in his back.

Shadowman: ..... That isn't one of mine.

Hardman: nnnnnnnnnhhhhhh!

Needlegal: Who could have done this?!

Shadowman: ..... Well, Doc Robot could have, but he's dead........ So is Bizarro........ The Terminators were all destroyed. However, this is an alternate reality, so -

(A sound is heard close by.)

Someone: So, it looks like the rumors are true. "The Mechanical Maniacs." Hh.

Needlegal: That voice....

(The figure leaps out of the shadows and into the light, revealing himself to be......)

Topman: GAUNTLET!?

Shadowman: No. You're this reality's Shadowman, right?

Evil Shadow: Geez. No kidding, Einstein! What gave it away?

Shadowman: Then it was YOU who killed Cossack.

(The evil Shadowman walks over and touches the shadowblade lodged inside Cossack's back.)

Evil Shadow: This alternate reality stuff is weird. Look at you! You're like an idiot version of ME! How embarrassing. Imagine that. The Megaman three robots form some sort of .... what? Super-hereo team? Hah!

Geminiman: Then YOU'RE the one behind Kalinka's death!

Evil Shadow: Well, not JUST me. But ...... yes, I had a role to play.

Needlegal: So what do you want? Or did you just come here to be some kinda asshole?

Evil Shadow: Well, thanks to you guys, Cossack was hunting down Megaman three people. And, unless you're dumber than I think, you can realize that might make life a bit more difficult than it needed to be for me. Cossack made a nice pawn, but his usefulness came to a rather .... abrupt end.

(Suddenly 2 robots enter the room!)

Brightman: What the Hell is going on here!?

Dustman: Yeah! Why haven't WE been fought yet!? You just ..... you just can't skip straight to Cossack before fighting and beating us! It's not right!!!

Evil Shadow: You didn't beat all eight robot masters!? Why the Hell are you here?!

Shadowman: Well, it'd save time if we just went straight here.....

Evil Shadow: Of all the incompetent......

Brightman: *gasp* He's dead!

Dustman: Who could have done this?!

Evil Shadow: For crying out -

(Suddenly 2 more robots enter the room!)

Megaman: What the Mega-Heck is going on here!

Mega Girl: *gasp* He's dead! Cossack's dead!

Megaman: Who could have done this!?

(Dustman, Brightman, Megaman, and Mega girl finally notice each other.)

Dustman, Brightman, Megaman, Mega Girl: YOU!? THIS MUST BE YOUR DOING!!

(All four robots begin to do battle!)

Shadowman: Oh, this is just stupid!

Needlegal: Should we help someone?

(Suddenly the four waring robots are blasted away!)

Brightman: ....What?

Megaman: PROTOMAN!

Protoman: Also known as Breakman!

(Protoman uses his Blues strike and a powerful blast knocks the four robots again!)

Evil Shadow: (thought) This is ridiculous. I'm outta here.

(Evil Shadowman teleports out and no one notices.)

Protoman: Well, you sure are the pesky annoyance aren't you, bro? Staying inside that secret hideout with our little sister here and 'ol Doc Tommy Light!

Dustman: You'll never stop us, renegade!

Brightman: You're time is over!

Protoman: heh.

(Protoman fires two powerful shots at Dustman and Brightman and they fall to the floor in pieces.)

Protoman: Real nice of you to weaken yourselves in this pointless fight. Wonder how it'll be being an only child.

(Suddenly a barrage of Shadowblades and Needle Cannons hit Protoman from behind and knock him off his feet!)

Protoman: What!?

Shadowman: Megaman may be kind of a pest, but we can't just let you kill the little guy!

Needlegal: Yeah!

Protoman: What the Hell are you talking about!? You're supposed ..... oh, you're those other Wily bots aren't you? The Mecha Men, right?

Shadowman: OH, I'm gonna kill you!

Protoman: I really don't think you powerless losers have what it takes to destroy me.

Geminiman: Well, let's find out.

Hardman: nnnnnnnnnhhhhhh!

(Protoman dashes at the team, but they avoid easily!)

(Needlegal jumps high and shoots a barrage of Needles at Protoman, sending him off balance, while Geminiman splits into two and blasts Protoman with the Gemini Lazer!)

Protoman: Ugh. Not bad....

(Protoman fires Dust Crusher and knocks one of the Gemini to the ground causing his double to disappear!)

(Protoman then uses rain flush to affect all the robots in the area!)

Topman: Not bad, but try my Tops on for size!

(Topman throws three tops towards Protoman, but Protoman uses Flash Stopper and freezed the Tops in place!)

Protoman: Freeze! Heh. Well, thanks to the time-stopping effects of Flash Stopper, nobody's moving, so not I'm free to kill my dippy siblings. Sorry, but I really don't care about you other losers.

(Suddenly, Protoman is hit by a Hard knuckle!)

Protoman: AGH!

Shadowman: Flash Stopper doesn't effect ALL robot masters you know. Just Pharaoh, and apparently Topman.

Protoman: .......

Shadowman: Alright, break's over!

(Shadowman slides towards Protoman while Hardman pumps up high preparing to crush Proto!)

(Both attacks miss as Protoman teleports out of the way!)


Needlegal: Guess he wasn't as tough as he thought he was.

Mega Girl: You .... saved us?

Topman: I guess.

Mega Girl: But ... you're Wily bots!

Topman: GOOD Wily bots. You guys just have trouble listening.


Megaman: Maybe we were mega-wrong about these guys?

Mega Girl: Let's take them back to our base. Maybe we can team up with them.

Megaman: What? Oh, I dunno about that....

Needlegal: Hey, you owe us that much!

(And so, after a little convincing, the Mechanical Maniacs are taken to Dr. Light's secret Lab .... which is actually located far below Wily's old Skull Castle! There they explain the existence of the evil Megaman three team and that they were the ones behind the deaths of Pharaoh, Skull, and Cossack and also that Protoman was probably working with them. They also explained who they were and how they came to be in this alternate reality.)

Dr. Light: Astounding! So, you are all actually from a different universe? And Cossack is ..... a hero there!?

Shadowman: Yep.

Mega Girl: Wow. That's amazing.

Geminiman: But, what bothers me is Protoman's talk of a "doc" as his superior........

Dr. Light: Why is that?

Geminiman: Because there's only one person capable of manipulating Cossack .... of rebuilding robot masters ...... of ordering Protoman around .... and that person is .... Doctor Wily!

Megaman, Mega girl, Dr. Light: WHAT!?

Geminiman: It all fits. Wily must have survived the collapse of his Skull Castle just as you did, Megaman!

Megaman: But .... the only reason I survived is because Mega girl Mega-rescued me at the last second!

Geminiman: Then Protoman must have rescued Wily just after you left. It all makes perfect sense.

Dr. Light: Perhaps you are right..... At any rate, your story does confirm one we have heard before.

Topman: What?

Dr. Light: Days ago a strange anomaly opened in Mega Land. We investigated and rescued several strangers. They appear to have knowledge of your ..... reality.

(The team meet Klashcom, Musashi Razz, Nova man, and Hadrian the Blues. After a night of cheer and revelry, the team nominates them Snakeman, Sparkman, Magnetman, and Hardman respectively!)

Dr. Light: Fascinating ...... so you can make other people robot masters at will?

Shadowman: Only if their positions are available, yes.

Dr. Light: Most unusual! How did this happen?

Shadowman: Erm ....... heh. Now THAT is a secret!

Dr. Light: Well, after hearing your story, I'd like to help you all out. You say you've lost your teleporters and some sort of "Transmetal armor"? I can help with that!

(And so, Doctor Light installs new teleporters and restores the Mechancial Maniacs' Transmetal armor!)

Hardman: Wow! So THIS is how it feels like to be a Transmetal Robot Master?

Snakeman: It's cool!

Topman: Remember, new guys, be careful with your powers. They're pretty far out.

Sparkman: You know ...... if you could fix us, why couldn't you have upgraded Megaman to fight Doctor Cossack?

Dr. Light: Hm' Upgrade in what way?

Magnetman: You know. Give him a slide feature, so he can go close to the ground and also avoid enemy shots.

Dr. Light: !!!! What an ingenious idea!


Shadowman: What about the Mega Buster?

Megaman: Mega-what?

Shadowman: You know. A buildup of energy resulting in more powerful blasts. ....... Like Proto's Blue's strike?

Dr. Light: My goodness! But a household robot could never be capable of so much power!


Hardman: Household robot?

Snakeman: What do you mean "household robot"? Didn't you upgrade him into a fighting robot because he had a strong sense of justice?

Dr. Light: Why would I do that? He has all the capabilities he needed as an ordinary household robot.

Needlegal: OF all the - ! No wonder why Cossack was winning! You guys didn't send a warrior to fight at all!!!

Dr. Light: Do you really think that would have helped?

The 'Maniacs: YES!!

Dr. Light: Hm. Well, Mega? You up to it?

Megaman: Whenever you are, Doctor!

Mega Girl: What about me, Doctor? I'm ready to fight!

Dr. Light: Heavens no!

Mega Girl: But.....

Dr. Light: NO! After all .... who would clean up after me? Come now, Mega, we have work to do.

Topman: So, THAT'S why Megaman's such a wuss in this reality.

Hardman: I guess this will make him even tougher.

(Megaman is plugged into the reprogramming machine and it glows brightly. After a moment, it opens and a new Megaman steps out!)

Dr. Light, Mega girl, the 'Maniacs: WOAH!

Megaman: Drugs are bad!

Snakeman: Hunh?

Megaman: Wow! Look at me! I look so cool! And .... hey..... I HAVEN'T SAID "MEGA" ONCE YET! MY SPEECH IMPEDIMENT IS CURED! YIPEEEEEEE!

Mega Girl: But what about me?

Shadowman: It's ....... the Megaman from the American TV show......

Dr. Light: Megaman! You look great!

Megaman: Thanks, Dr. Light! And now that I'm a fighting robot, All of Doctor Wily's forces of evil no-goods can look out! I'll kick their butt!

Snakeman: Hm.....I guess things turned out all right after all ...

Needlegal: Yeah, and we learned something too....

Mega Girl: But what about me?!

Shadowman: And what has this string of nonsensical events taught us?

Needlegal: That sometimes something's so broke nobody can fix it.

Shadowman: Ah, I see.

Megaman: Hey, what's that supposed to mean?

Needlegal: Oh, nothing.


Topman: Well, until the other half of our team leaves suddenly, we are .... the Mechanical Maniacs!



Musashiden Razz as .....
Hexlaser as .....
Psycho Magnet as .....
Hadrian Howell as .....
    Nightmare as .....
Lennon as .....
Jonathan S. as .....
Gauntlet as .....


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