Series 5 Issue #3 - The Knights Have Landed


Out in cold snowy regions of Megalopolis a giant sphere has suddenly crashed into land and from that sphere, out come 6 figures.

Knight: Perfect. This looks like a good new home.

Cloaked Beast: That's what you said about the last planet.

Knight: Quiet you bloated fool!

Troll: Doesn't matter, once we're done with it it'll look like a wasteland anyway.

Lady: You mean once you're done with it. The rest of us aren't a bunch of crazy lunatics that mindlessly level cities.

Troll: Shut up newbie!

Cloaked Beast: Do not speak in that tone to my pet!

Lady: Excuse me? I'm your pet?

Cloaked Beast: I created you! Therefore you are my pet!

Lady: I refuse to be called that you sick perverted floating piece of lard!

Cloaked Beast: Silence!

Ninja: To think I decided to tag along with you lot. There has got to be a warrior worthy of a duel with me on this new planet. I'm outta here.

Troll: Why did we bring that guy along? He cannot be trusted.

Knight: Because he is more skilled than you are, and we need more than just us four.

Swordsman: What about me?

Knight: We never asked you to come!

Cloaked Beast: Personally I think we should have left him on the old planet when it blew up.

Lady: Shouldn't we be focusing on something better to do rather than arguing? We do have a planet to conquer.

Knight: Yes, but first we must eliminate all life and start a New World!

Meanwhile at the Ark, The Mechanical Maniacs are having dinner.

Magnetman: Whose turn is it to cook?

Needlegal: Gem's

Geminiman: *appears behind Needlegal* You rang Needle?

Needlegal: Huh? I thought you were in the kitchen.

Geminiman: I was but I heard someone call so came here.

Needlegal: Well go back to the kitchen before something burns.

Geminiman: Fine. *Walks out of the room*

Magnetman: Great we got more weird food.

Sparkman: Really I reckon Geminiman is a good cook.

Geminiman: *appears behind Sparkman* Someone called for me?

Sparkman: How did you?

Geminiman: So I came out here for nothing. Why do I even bother? *Walks out of the room*

Topman: The thing is robots don't eat. So why bother cooking?

Needlegal: Wouldn't know.

Outside the Ark, Geminiman is talking to a deliveryman.

Geminiman: There you go forty dollars. Now scram!

Deliveryman: What about my tip?

Geminiman: I said scram!

Deliveryman: Thank you for ordering Oriental Meals!

Geminiman: Heh, like I'm really going to cook. This trick gets them every time.

Shadowman: What trick? Ordering Chinese food?

Geminiman: No I'm not ordering Chinese food.

Shadowman: Really? Because I could have sworn I saw you pay that deliveryman for Chinese food.

Geminiman: You saw nothing!

Geminiman walks back inside to serve the food.

Geminiman: Dinner is served!

The Mechanical Maniacs: *groan*

Geminiman: What's wrong with my food?

Magnetman: It's just weird. I mean last time you made Ostrich with spicy sauce.

Geminiman: What's wrong with ostrich? If you ask me it tastes like beef.

Snakeman: Well what's on the menu for today?

Geminiman: Eel.

Snakeman: Eel? You expect us to eat this? You know eels are related to snakes! It's like you're asking me to eat my on family!

Geminiman: That's why I got duck as well!

Suddenly Teletran One starts making a beeping sound.

Magnetman: Jeez! That thing still works?

Topman: Looks like there's a disturbance out in the snowy regions of Megalopolis.

Sparkman: That can only mean one thing!

Hardman: Decepticons!

Shadowman: Hey! That's my line!

Geminiman: Well actually it's Optimus Prime's.

Shadowman: I know that! Don't question me on Transformer lines! I know all!

Snakeman: Well we'd better go see what the Decepticons are up to.

Magnetman: Yeah! No more or Geminiman's cooking!

Geminiman: *sigh*

The Mechanical Maniacs teleport out to the crash site of the strange sphere to investigate the disturbance

Shadowman: That's weird, it seems that the Decepticons aren't here.

Geminiman: One may think it could be an ambush.

Snakeman: Well I've launched search snakes around the area so we'll know if anything is around here.

Topman: Hey! What's that sphere over there?

Geminiman: If you ask me I think its base of some sort.

Needlegal: Although, the opening looks too small for Decepticons.

Shadowman: Then who or what could be behind this?

Hardman: Maybe it's aliens sent to rob us of our beer!

The Mechanical Maniacs: *stare at Hardman*

Hardman: It could happen!

Shadowman: Well I wouldn't rule out aliens.

Sparkman: How come?

Shadowman: I think it's the large crater that the sphere happens to be lying in.

Hardman: So I'm right?

Snakeman: About everything except the beer part.

Hardman: Yeah! I'm right for a change!

Knight: It seems we have some guests.

Cloaked Beast: Brilliant! More test subjects for my bizarre and cruel experiments!

Lady: *sigh* What is it with you and your experiments?

Cloaked Beast: Silence! I will not tolerate that kind of behaviour from you my pet!

Needlegal: Pet? I take offence to that!

Cloaked Beast: And why is that?

Needlegal: You treat her as if she if some sort of play toys of yours which in my opinion sounds very sexist! Us women are equal to you men.

Lady: You say it sister!

Cloaked Beast: No you got it all wrong. I call her my pet because I created here therefore she is my pet.

Topman: That just sounds wrong.

Troll: Enough talk! Let's smash them!

Knight: Calm down Belselk! We will fight them soon.

Snakeman: Uh, you do realise that we have twice as many people you have.

Knight: You do not seem familiar with us? We are the Quarter Knights! I am Zeikfried! Leader of the Quarter Knights, the floating bloated one is Alhazad,

Alhazad: Greetings!

Zeikfried: The girl is Lady Harken.

Lady Harken: Pleasure meeting you.

Zeikfried: And the troll is Belselk.

Belselk: You will all suffer my power!

Shadowman: Let me guess. You're a group of villains who have landed here to take over the world. Am I right?

Zeikfried: No we won't be taking over anyone.

Belselk: We'll be killing them!

Lady Harken: Shut up you incompetent fool!

Shadowman: So you're here to kill everyone then I guess you take over.

Zeikfried: And then we'll make a new home from what's left of the place for us demons!

Geminiman: Honestly I've heard the story before. I suggest you just leave now and save us the hassle of beating you in a pulp and then sending you back to wherever you came from.

Alhazad: Good luck on doing that! Our home planet blew up!

Snakeman: Then we'll just have to beat you into a pulp.

Belselk: That'll never happen! No one has ever fought me and lived to tell the tale!

Hardman fires a Hard Knuckle at Belselk and knocks him out.

Hardman: Until now.

Zeikfried: That was a cheap shot! We're the villains! We're supposed to do that!

Shadowman: Yeah well we're a bunch of tricksters so we cheat a lot.

Zeikfried: I have underestimated you. Well we'll concede defeat for now. But you have not heard the last of us!

The Quarter Knights leave dragging Belselk's unconscious body along with them.

Swordsman: Now is my chance! If I can kill the big guy they'll make me a Quarter Knight and kick Belselk out for good!

The Swordsman jumps from his hiding place and attacks Hardman but breaks his sword on Hardman's armor.

Swordsman: No! You broke my sword the Doom Bringer!

Magnetman: Who are you?

Swordsman: I am the great swordsman Zed! Just you wait! I'll show you my amazing swordsman skills!

Sparkman: With what? You broke your sword on Hardman's armor.

Zed: Just a small problem it can be fixed.

Snakeman: Whatever man, I'm outta here.

Magnetman: I'd rather eat Gem's cooking then stand here and watch these guys.

Shadowman: Let's just all head back to the Ark.

The Mechanical Maniacs walk off leaving Zed behind.

Zed: Don't turn your back on me! I'm Zed! The Great Swordsman!

Back at the Ark.

Magnetman: Well that was a rather uneventful evening.

Hardman: I dunno it was funny watching those Quarter Knight guys.

Snakeman: Hmm… I guess everything turned out all right.

Needlegal: Yeah and we learned something too.

Shadowman: That Hardman can actually kick people's asses without trying?

Hardman: Yeah!

Needlegal: No, we learned that arrogance can lead to anyone's downfall. Both Belselk and Zed believe themselves to be the greatest but lost to Hardman who wasn't even trying and was probably drunk at the time.

Hardman: True that!

Magnetman: It's a good thing the Quarter Knights showed up. I was able to throw away all of Geminiman's cooking while we were leaving.

Geminiman: *appears behind Magnetman* You did what? Do you realise I paid $40 for that meal to be made and delivered here.

Needlegal: That stuff was fast food?

Geminiman: It's restaurant quality! And you heard nothing!

Topman: Well until Geminiman stops ordering dinner. We are… The Mechanical Maniacs!

Cast
Musashiden Razz as ..... Raijin as ..... Psycho Magnet as .....
Sparkman Snakeman Needlegal
Hadrian Howell as ..... Nightmare as .....
Hardman Topman
Lennon as ..... Jonathan S. as ..... Gauntlet as .....
Geminiman Magnetman Shadowman

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