Series 6 Issue #1 - The Case of the Missing Base

By Gauntlet (Shadowman)

---

The Mechanical Maniacs respond to a distress cal from the citizens of Monsteropolis. It seems that Waveman has gone on a rampage inside of the local Chapters.

Store clerk: Mechanical Maniacs! Thank God you've come!

Geminiman: Ahh, humble storekeep! What seems to be the trouble?

Store Clerk: That stupid robot is ruining everything! You have to help!

Topman: Waveman ... by himself?

Snakeman: I guess the others just don't read.

Topman: This'll be a snap.

(The 'Maniacs open the doors to find the place soaked with water .... with Waveman right in the center of it all.)

Waveman: Huhh huhh huhhh ....

Geminiman: What .... the ...?

Hardman: Is he .... crying?

Waveman: Huhh huhh huhhh ....

Topman: Uh .... I don't really know what to do in this situation.

Geminiman: We gotta kick his ass!

Spark Chan: We can't do that! It's so mean!

Geminiman: Why? He's a bad guy!

Spark Chan: Gemmy! You're awful!

Hardman: Great thinking, small fry.

Topman: Yeah "Gemmy".

Geminiman: Quiet you two!

Shadowman: *Sigh* Maybe this is more up your alley, Sparks.

Spark Chan: Um ... okie ....

(Spark Chan cautiously walks near the crying Waveman while the other 'Maniacs go outside to avoid the pathetic scene. Sparks soon joins them.)

Shadowman: So, what's up?

Spark Chan: He ... well, it turns out he was reading some poetry and it just .... moved him to tears.

Magnetman: WHAT!?

Snakeman: HAH! That's pathetic!

Spark Chan: It's not really *that* bad you guys.

Hardman: Uh, I'd say it is pretty pathetic.

Shadowman: So, he's better now, eh?

Spark Chan: He was pretty inconsolable.

....

Magnetman: (Stares coldly at the store) People that pathetic should be killed.

Spark Chan: Honestly, Maggie-kun!

Magnetman: I'm not wrong. They drag down civilisation!

Snakeman: Why didn't you shoot him?!

Spark Chan: I couldn't shoot him! He's crying!

Shadowman: Hardman.

Hardman: Right, boss.

(Hardman walks into the store).

Spark Chan: Oh, no .... what are you gonna do?

(A few seconds later Waveman is seen crashing through the ceiling and into the air, with Hardman's fist propelling him ever higher.

Waveman: Whyyyyyyyyyyyyy ~ ?

Hardman: (coming out of the store) And that's another case closed!

Shadowman: Good work, team!

Manager: Good work? Good work!? You punched a hole in my ceiling!

Shadowman: That's in the budget! We're off!

Manager: Wait!

Shadowman: We're OFF!

(And so, the 'Maniacs teleport back to base ..... or at least they try to.)

Geminiman: Hm. We're .... still here.

Snakeman: Wait. Does this mean.

(A few hours and a taxi payment later.)

Shadowman: IT HAPPENED AGAIN!!!

(The Mechanical Maniacs are frustrated as the Ark and the volcano it was crashed into are nowhere to be seen! All that remains is Needlegal sleeping soundly on her bed.)

Shadowman: NEEDLE! YOU IDIOT! WAKE UP!

Needlegal: Wuh? Hey ... why are we outside?

Shadowman: We are outside because the base is GONE!

Needlegal: What?? What happened!?

Shadowman: We don't know! You should tell us!

Needlegal: Well, how can I tell you? I was asleep!

Shadowman: How could you have been asleep!

Hardman: Aw, man! All our precious memories!

Topman: All our STUFF!

Spark Chan: What'll we do you guys? There doesn't seem to be a clue!

Geminiman: We're supposed to be cops, right!? Well, let's do what cops do .... call CSI!

(A multitude of special effects later, the Mechanical Maniacs are talking with the head of CSI - Gil Grissom.)

Topman: Oh, man .... for some reason ... I'm dizzy.

Geminiman: Shake it off, Top. We all get dizzy around the CSI.

Needlegal: So what do you go, Gris?

Grissom: I had my people scrape the entire scene of dirt for a few hours to look for clues.

Magnetman: ALL the dirt? That was a mountain!

Grissom: It was .... a mountain's worth of dirt.

(A flashback-montage occurs where the CSI gather all the dirt and comb over it.)

Topman: Oh, man ... there it goes again.

Grissom: After that we replicated blood-splatter patterns using bags of blood "donated" by my staff.

(CGI effects of Grissom firing a bullet into a dummy. Blood splatters over a white wall.)

Shadowman: There was no blood.

Grissom: .... No. But now we know for sure.

Geminiman: So, you didn't find anything?

Grissom: On the contrary, we found this.

(Grissom takes out an envelope, the camera zooms in quickly with a "whooshing" sound)

Topman: Damn it! The room's spinning .... in a bad way!

Shadowman: (While reading the note) The ark is yours to find. If you have a mind.

...

Shadowman: What the Hell is this!?

Grissom: It appears to be a riddle.

Shadowman: A riddle.

Grissom: Don't worry, I have the answer for you.

Topman: Does it involve more unnecessary special effects?

Grissom: .... Yes.

Grissom: First we analyses the handwriting to find any discrepancies in the writing. It was found that there were none. Next we analyses the ink. It's from a simple ballpoint pen made in the year 1989. Now, I say 1989 because ink was changed because of a government cover up. A good friend of mine has plenty of theories on that.

Snakeman: Lemme guess .... Agent Moulder?

Grissom: How'd you guess?

Snakeman: It's a small world.

Grissom: Next we analyses the paper. Common letter paper. We then burned a bit of the envelope and found ...

(The 'Maniacs lean in intently.)

Grissom: Nothing.

Shadowman: UGH!

Needlegal: So, you didn't find anything at all?

Grissom: Actually, a simply DNA test revealed the criminal who licked the seal on the envelope is none other than .... Carmen Sandiego!

The 'Maniacs: CARMEN SANDIEGO!?

Grissom: I'm afraid you're in the wrong department.

(The 'Maniacs walk out of the police station in shock.)

Needlegal: Carmen Sandiego! Carmen Sandiego!

Shadowman: Yes, YES! There's no need to repeat the name constantly.

Needlegal: But isn't she suppose to leave more clues behind than just that?

Shadowman: Well, maybe. But there's an entire agency made to deal with this .....

(And so the Mechanical Maniacs go to the ACME Crime Detective Agency and meet with their new chief .....)

Hardman: Oh, this is un-be-freakin' LIEVABLE! YOU'RE the Chief!

Riddler: Correct, Hardman! Who-ho-ho-ho-hooooooo!

Shadowman: *sigh* Well ... we need a warrant for Carmen Sandiego, okay?

Riddler: Riddle me this, Mechanical Maniacs: Why should I help you?

Shadowman: Because it's your job.

Riddler: Riddle me this ... riddle me that .... Riddle me this! What's black and white and flies?

Geminiman: What the ...?

Riddler: Your warrant! Out the window! Hoo-hooo-hoooooo!

Magnetman: How about we beat the warrant outta him?

Hardman: Chill, small fry! We're cops now, remember? And he's the chief here. We can't just do whatever we like anymore.

Riddler: Hoo hoooo! Riddle me this, Mechanical Maniacs! How can you get your base back without your precious warrant?

Spark Chan: But, Riddler-kun .... aren't you sick of Carmen Sandiego stealing your gag? Isn't that why you're the head here at Acme?

....

Riddler: (jumps on the desk and does a small dance before saying) Right you are, little missy! You get the prize! Hoo hooo hooooooo!

Spark Chan: Oh. Goodie!

Rockapella: The Warrant!

(The 'Maniacs jump in surprise.)

Hardman: Who were those guys?

Riddler: I dunno. Leftovers from the old crew.

(From out of nowhere)

Moulder: You people again!

The 'Maniacs: GAH!

Geminiman: It's HIM!

Moulder: Relax, guys. This time ... we're on the same side. This time. This time...

Snakeman: We are?

Moulder: Have you ever heard of .... Area 51?

Hardman: She's an alien!

Moulder: No.

Hardman: Really? You don't think she's an alien?

Moulder: Not everyone's an alien. Just most people.

Spark Chan: So, Area 51 ...

Moulder: She STOLE Area 51! All of it!

Hardman: Shoulda seen that one comin'.

Moulder: She's been on the FBI's most wanted list ever since.

Riddler: Am I on that list?

Moulder: Who are you? And why should I care?

Riddler: Riddle me this, smart guy! Who's gonna get you while you sleep? Free answer! ME!

Moulder: Carmen Sandiego has all the answers .... to the universe .... to the big questions. Sometimes I lie awake at night wondering just how much she's not telling us ....

...

Moulder: Um, well, anyway, we have a special agent here to help you find Carmen Sandiego. If anyone can find her .... this man can.

Waldo: Howdy, guys! My name's Waldo.

Topman: WALDO! I've been looking ... for years .... for YEARS!

Waldo: And here I am!

Topman: (squeals like a little girl)

Waldo: Um ....

Topman: I WIN!

Geminiman: Not from where I'm standing.

Needlegal: So, how're you gonna help us find Carmen? Did Grissom give you an especially useful clue?

Waldo: Naw, we don't need Grissom. All we need is the magic walking stick the wizard Whitebeard gave me!

Needlegal: Um, I don't like the randomness of this adventure!

Shadowman: Party pooping noted. Let the randomness begin!

(Waldo waves his walking stick in the air creating a portal to lands unknown. Tentatively the 'Maniacs step through ....)

Spark Chan: Hm. This .... doesn't look like the place.

Shadowman: No indeed.

Geminiman: This place looks familiar....

Waldo: Hm. I haven't been here before, that's for sure.

Shadowman: And where's Topman?

Waldo: Well, I just felt it was best to leave him behind.

Snakeman: You WHAT!?

Waldo: Well, he was freaking me out a little.

Snakeman: Hh. Makes .... sense.

???: You there! What are you doing here?!

Hardman: GWAHH! It's some naked green-skinned lady!

Magnetman: What the heck is - ?

Shadowman: Oh, wait, I know, this is the Cleft of Dimension! Where all Final Fantasy character go to die! And this here's -

Geminiman: Dark Cloud!! The sexiest of all Final Fantasy villanesses!

Dark Cloud: Ah, yes, I see one here is wise.

Exdeath: Come, Dark Cloud! We must hurry! Sephiroth needs our help!

Geminiman: Seph-Sephiroth?

Dark Cloud: Indeed! He has been captured by Ultimecia in another ridiculous "time kompression" plan.

Geminiman: Sephiroth was captured!?

Snakeman: Gem, I sense a boy-crush on Sephiroth coming on here.

Exdeath: Come on! We must hurry to Mysidia!

Geminiman: Can I .... Can I join your party? I can summon the Esper known as Odin and have great Sword Master skills!

Needlegal: What? You still have those?

Geminiman: Don't you ruin this for me!

Spark Chan: But Gemmi-hun, we need your help to find our base!

Exdeath: Oh, let the boy come along. We could use some cannon fodder.

Dark Cloud: Oh .... very well. It's likely someone will die by the time we reach Sephiroth and I'd rather it be you and not me.

Geminiman: YES!

Spark Chan: But, Gemmi-hun!

Magnetman: I think we lost the man.

Waldo: Let's move on.

(And with a twirl of his magic wand Waldo creates another portal to another world, bringing the team of heroes straight into....a trap!)

Magnetman: Smooth move, candy-cane.

Waldo: Aw, geez .... I'm sorry you guys.

Magnetman: "Geez" won't help us get free from these ropes!

Goldar: Nothing will, human! Hah hah hah hah! You're all going to be the main course in the meal of Rita Repulsa!

(The 'Maniacs and Waldo are all in a large pot with the water beginning to boil!)

Baboo: Ooooo, it looks positively scrumptious, doesn't it?

Finster: My best work yet!

Goldar: SILENCE! I want to hear their screams of suffering as their flesh melts from their bones!

Rita: Ahhh! I see my souffle is going well!

Hardman: Not as well as you think, lady!

Rita: Hah hah hah.... someone in your position can't make very good threats.

Hardman: I've been saving this one fer another rainy day .... which, I guess, is today!

(Hardman opens up his chest and releases a large, spiked, metal ball! It destroys the giant pot the 'Maniacs and Waldo were in and knocks Goldar off his feet!)

Shadowman: Good job, Hardman!

(Shadowman summons a Shadow blade to cut the ropes and frees the team from bondage!)

Rita: You'll never get away without your precious walking stick!

(Rita proudly displays Waldo's walking stick above her head).

Rita: With this I can sneak inside the Power Chamber and none of you can stop me!

Snakeman: (While erupting from the ground directly below Rita Repulsa) Sure we can, screechy!

Rita: NO!!! Oh, why did I bring the walking stick in here with me!?

Snakeman: Because hair like that suffocates the brain!

(Snakeman tosses the walking stick back at Waldo who catches it and begins to make another portal)

Rita: AHHHHHH!

(Rita hurls bolts of lightning at Snakeman, who's caught inside it's energy)

Waldo: The snake guy!

Rita: Heh heh heh .... let's make a trade, shall we? That walking stick for your friend here! What do you say?

Snakeman: Don't worry, guys! We can get the damn stick back!

....

Shadowman: So, whose up for organizing an audition for Snakeman number .... are we up to four?

Snakeman: HEY!

Hardman: I got it, boss.

Snakeman: HEY!

Needlegal: We were never really that close.

Snakeman: What the HEll!?

Spark Chan: Oh dear!

(The Mechanical Maniacs dive through the portal!)

....

Baboo: Oh, dear...

Snakeman: Those bastards.

Rita: I HAVE A HEAD ACHE!!

(The 'Maniacs appear in a room full of explosions and lasers flying about in total chaos!)

Magnetman: Where the Hell is this!?

Cyclops: Look! More of Professor X's new traps!

Jubilee: I love blowing stuff up in the danger room!

Magnetman: Hey, wait! Wait! We're not -

(Magnet is blown away by Jubilee's explosions!)

Cyclops: And now for the rest!

Jubilee: heh heh heh ... I'll blow 'em up good!

Needlegal: GET US OUT OF HERE, WALDO!!

Waldo: *ulp*, right!

(Waldo creates a portal and the 'Maniacs end up in a slightly familiar laboratory...)

Waldo: Hm. This seems like a nice place!

Shadowman: yeah, and kind of familiar.

Hardman: Wait. Wait, it can't be.

Megaman: It's you guys! You're back!

(Megaman gives Needlegal a big hug!)

Needlegal: Urk! Er, um ... hi, Megaman.

Waldo: Megaman?

Hardman: This is that alternate universe we saved!*

(*See the first half of Series 4!)

Mega Girl: Saved? Saved!?

Shadowman: What? We did save it!

Megaman: Oh, Mega Girl, it's not their fault. They couldn't know.

Shadowman: Hey, ho ... what's the problemo?

Mega Girl: You brought all that alien technology here! That Borg stuff! It's infesting everything! It's gotten into the computers, the cars, the people .... everything! And now ...

Spark Chan: Oh, no .... is your world becoming a new collective?

Mega Girl: Worse! It's full of petty criminals!

Spark Chan: Wait ... What?

Mega Girl: You heard me!

Megaman: Doctor Light was infected .... just today he "assimilated" Mega Girl's broom and won't give it back.

Mega Girl: He's assimilated all the food in the fridge too! But now it's even worse! They're building space ships so they can assimilate planets everywhere! And Mega girl here -

Megaman: I told you not to call me that, MG.

Mega Girl: Needs help! Guess who just volunteered?

Shadowman: Um, we really have to go. I mean ... I'm sorry to hear all this, but this isn't our reality and we weren't even responsible for bringing that tech -

Mega Girl: (Gabs Shadowman by his scarf and drags him to her level.) Are you bailing on me!?

Shadowman: Ohhhhhh ... not at all! But, ah ... um ... Classi here will love to help you!

Spark Chan: What!? Me!?

Shadowman: Sure! You're all for helping people, right?

Spark Chan: Yeah.

Shadowman: And these people need help, right?

Spark Chan: Yeah.

Shadowman: Then it's agreed! And besides ... you just might be a good influence on Mega Girl here.

Mega Girl: It's actually Mega Woman now! This is Mega "Girl" right here!

Megaman: Now, you know how that hurts my feelings....

Spark Chan: But - !

Shadowman: Gotta go!

(The 'Maniacs disappear into another portal and enter a dark chamber... and witness something disturbing)

Robin: (screams like a girl)

Batman: Oh my God! How did they get in here!? And ....at such an in-opportune time!

Waldo: Oh ... dear.

Needlegal: Oh ... my God....

Batman: Now, now, citizens ... it isn't what it looks like ....

Shadowman: Waldo...?

Waldo: I think .... something's missing in me now, Shadowman.

Hardman: it's called innocence, Waldo.

Batman: You know, I am quite wealthy. There are benefits to silence.

Needlegal: And there's age limits on that sort of thing!

Batman: Now, there's no need to get the police involved....

Needlegal: We are the police!

Batman: Oh ..... dear ....

From outside: Hello? Is anyone there? I thought I heard a noise....

Batman: Aunt Harriet! For goodness sakes, don't come in!

Needlegal: You guys go on. This sicko needs to be prosecuted!

Robin: Bruce ... hold me.

Needlegal: This is all sorts of weird!

(And so the 'Maniacs, once again, leave the scene!)

Galvatron: You people!!

Hardman: What the Hell!?

Waldo: Friend of yours?

Galvatron: What are you doing here!?

Shadowman: Galvatron! Long time no see!

Galvatron: I finally escaped that accursed prison you sent me to.* I tried to put all those years of frustrations behind me. My therapist says I made good progress. But, now ... you're here!

(Series 4, issue 26)

Hardman: Um, if you'd give us two seconds we could just go away...

Galvatron: Ozmodian says you all must die!

Hardman: Ozmodian?

Galvatron: Die, Autobot!

(Galvatron transforms into a cannon and begins to shoot at the heroes! In the nick of time they all escape and find themselves elsewhere!)

Hardman: Good God! Where are we now.

Darth Vader: Hello there.

All: AHH!

Shadowman: Waldo! Portal!

Waldo: Ahh, right!

Darth Vader: Wait!

(The heroes jump into the portal.)

Darth Vader: ... I'm so lonely...

(The 'Maniacs arrive at yet another portal..)

Ash: And we learned all about friendship again!

Pikachu: Pika!

Jesse: I'm getting far too old for this...

(And again....)

Frankie: My .... friends .... help ... Frankie?

(And again...)

Ken: Need a place to crash ...

(And again...)

Goku: Gotta train!

Piccolo: Gotta train!

Cell: Gotta train!

(And again...)

Geminiman: Oh, thank God you guys are back! I really need -

(And again ...)

Mumm-ra: ...The ever ..... LIVING....!

(And again....)

Ninja Gaiden: !@#$!!!! !@#$!!!! !@#$!!!!

(Hardman pounds on his head to shut him up. 'Gaiden falls to the floor, unconscious.)

Shadowman: Okay, I've about had it, Waldo! How in the Hell is this helping us find our base!?

Waldo: Well ... My specialty isn't really finding things .... as much as it is getting more lost.

Hardman: We lost all of our friends on this stupid little journey!

Waldo: Hey, I lost things too! Like my coffee mug, my binoculars, my key, my shoe..

Shadowman: We had better get there, Waldo..

Waldo: Well, as I always say, 20th time's the charm!

(And so the 'Maniacs finally arrive at Liberty Island, home of the Statue of Liberty .... where they find ...)

Rockapella: The Ark!

Shadowman: How did they get here!?

Waldo: I dunno ...

Shadowman: Hey .... where's Hardman?

Waldo: I thought I saw him talking to that kid in the mask. I thought the kid needed the lecture, so...

Shadowman: Great. Just great! He was my last guy!

Riddler: Then I guess it's the final showdown for you, Shadowman!

Shadowman: What!?

Rockapella: The Riddler!

Waldo: But you're supposed to be on our side!

Riddler: Riddle me this! What rhymes with "flies", but is more fun to do?

Shadowman: Oh, for Pete's sake ....

Waldo: What .... rhymes with ....?

Shadowman: Oh, for crying out loud!

???: And he's not alone!

Rockapella: Alex Trebek!

Shadowman: Stop doin' that!

Alex Trebek: (While stepping out of the shadows) Yes, it's me.

Shadowman: What're you doing here?

Alex Trebek: I ask the questions here, ninja!

Riddler: Hoo hooo hooooooo! Trebek has all the answers! He belongs with Carmen Sandiego!

Alex Trebek: Waldo ... these people have nothing in common with you. Why ... you belong here. With us! Riddler, myself, and Carmen Sandiego. Helping us hide all the world's treasures! The answers ... all of them ... belong to people like us! Only we truly understand the questions and answers of the world. Only we truly understand you, Waldo. You've proven yourself a long time ago. Join us! With you as a part of our group nobody could ever find us!

Riddler: Hoo hooo hooooooo! Whadya say, stripes?

Waldo: Trebek.... you were my hero! And Nigma ... for shame, Riddler! I could never use my powers of getting lost for evil. Never!

...

Alex Trebek: I'm sorry, Waldo. Your answer must be in the form of a question. Get them, Rockapella!

(Rockapella attacks Waldo and Shadowman, but the band soon find themselves overwhelmed by the fact that they are a few musicians against a robot with actual weapons!)

Riddler: No! Not again!

Alex Trebek: You may have won the battle, ninja. But this celebrity has picked Revenge! For 800! And guess, what? It's a Daily Double!

Shadowman: Shut it!

SFX: BAM!

SFX: POW!

SFX: BIFF!

Waldo: So, we got the crooks.

Shadowman: Yes, but where's -

(The blue-clad ninja is interrupted as the Ark is lifted into the sky by several helicopters! Lights shine all over Liberty Island as the Ark is heaved into the air in front of the duo's eyes!)

Shadowman: No! Nooooo!

Waldo: We were so close!

Carmen: (from on top of the ark, her voice is amplified by speakers) It looks like it's game over, players.

Waldo: Carmen!

Carmen: Waldo....

Waldo: Carmen. Please, come back, Carmen! You know we're meant to be together!

Carmen: Then join with me, Waldo! Let us get lost .... together!

Waldo: You know that I can't Carmen.

Carmen: Then .... this is goodbye again, Waldo.

Waldo: (teary eyed) One day we'll find each other, Carmen. Until that day ... I'll keep on looking.

Shadowman: *sigh* This is way too mushy for my tastes, Waldo. And look at that. She's already outta sight.

Waldo: *sigh*

Shadowman: But you know .... it's not so bad. It's better to have loved and lost, right? I mean ... you just gotta keep trying, man. You'll catch her one day. Well, I guess this is it. Man, I wish we hadn't lost another base. I ... Waldo?

(Shadowman looks around and sees nobody.)

Shadowman: Waldo?

....

Shadowman: Uh, Waldo? All set to go home now?

....

....

....

(Thunder is heard overhead. Suddenly heavy rain begins to fall on the ninja.)

Shadowman: God Damn you, Waldo.

(And, so ... eventually ... the Mechanical Maniacs all manage to find each other and sit in the cold, lonely, night where the Ark and the volcano it crashed into, used to be.)

Topman: I can't believe you guys left me behind.

Magnetman: (eyes Topman coldly) It was Waldo's idea.

Topman: I freaking hate Waldo. I. Hate. Waldo.

Hardman: We all hate Waldo, kid.

Snakeman: Well, I guess things turned out all right...

Needlegal: And we all learned a thing or two, I bet.

Topman: *grunts* I learned that some people aren't all they're cracked up to be. I finally find Waldo and he ditched me! And I'm the first one to get ditched too!

Needlegal: And I learned that some people can seem quite normal, but can still be deeply .... deeply disturbed.

Geminiman: I learned that Sephiroth is an ungrateful jerk. He stabbed me in my damned chest!  Slowly! What's up with that!?

Magnetman: I learned that mind readers are easily offended people. Especially if they're around people like me.

Snakeman: I learned that robots don't make for good meals. I also learned that sometimes ... just sometimes .... monsters don't care about that ....

Hardman: I learned a few swears I never heard before. And some old swears in new combinations.

Spark Chan: Gosh, I learned the true meaning of fighting! I honestly didn't know I was able to causing a revolution .... But I saved an entire world! Me! And I toughened Megaman up a little. And softened Mega Girl up a LOT. Those are some memories I'll always cherish.

Needlegal: And what did you learn, dear brother?

Shadowman: I learned how bad it is to ditch you guys. You're my teammates. My friends. I value our friendship and I'm totally sorry for ever taking advantage of you guys.

Needlegal: Hm.

Spark Chan: I don't think that's enough.

Shadowman: I also learned that my own ambitions don't always come first. That you guys and your opinions ... they're also important.

Topman: I got another thing the "boss" can learn.

Snakeman: What's that?

Topman: How to give a great foot massage!

Shadowman: *groan* but you've already made me polish all of your armor. And weapons (if you have 'em). And to buy you dinner. Isn't that enough? Can you please put back my weapons systems now?

Topman: I hear talking when I should be hearing my own feet being massaged.

(suddenly a truck pulls into the area.)

....

Snakeman: Oh, wait a minute here ....

(The truck transforms into Optimus Prime!)

Optimus: Greetings, my little friends!

Needlegal: Optimus!

Shadowman: Optimus .... Prime. Great.

Optimus: I must be quick, 'Maniacs. Time is short. Galvatron is on the loose again. Nobody knows what set him off this time, but he's more insane than ever. We need the Ark to combat his threat. I'm sorry, but I have to take it back. Erm ... where is it? And what is Shadowman doing with Topman's feet?

Shadowman: Kill me. Please.

Topman: Well, until Shadowman gets his dignity back, we are ..... The Mechanical Maniacs!

The End

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