Series 6 Issue #4 - Attack of the Replicates

The Mechanical Maniacs are found at the scene of a crime in progress! It's a shootout at a Light's Lab facility being robbed by . . . themselves!?

Shadow-copy: For everlasting justice! This is ours!

Magnet-copy: Treasure this is ours! Let no one person stand in the path that is in front of us!!

Snakeman: I thought you said you destroyed all these bad copies!

Shadowman: I did, damn it! But they just keep popping up!

(Kenta destroys dozens of Magnet-clones with his Magnet-bullets)

Magnetman: This is shameful! Who created these walking insults!?

Geminiman: it was - !

(Hardman clamps a meaty hand over Gemini's mouth)

Hardman: Best not to mention that sort of thing around the new guy.

Magnetman: GWAHHH!!!!

(Magnetman continues to pound copies, but more escape his rage.)

Magnetman: This is worse than almost anything I've had to endure!

Magnet-copy: Killing our kind he is!

Magnet-copy: Then together we must attach!

(Several Magnet copies join together and transform into a pirated Magnetman the size of a truck!)

Hardman: What the Hell!?

Shadowman: I did NOT design it to do THAT!

Mega-Magnet-copy: I SMASH!!!

(Mega Mags "SMASH"-es Kenta into the ground!)

Magnetman: GUFFF!!

Gemini-copy: I am not overdone!

(The Gemini-copy splits into a dozen forms and begins to attack the real deal's measly six!)

Geminiman: These guys are getting tougher to deal with!

Shadowman: We can't let these guys get away ..... they're damned copies!

(Shadowman chucks a Shadow Blade at the humongous Magnetman and it gets stuck in its forehead!)

Mega-Magnet-copy: MWAHHHH!!!!

Geminiman: That didn't do much good!

Shadowman: Observe, grasshopper!

(Shadowman does a dozen unnecessary hand signs in quick succession and the Shadow Blade explodes, taking Magnet-copy's head with it!)

Topman: Nice!

Spark Chan: That'll teach that lousy copy!

Snakeman: Spark Chan! Aren't you worried about violence?

Spark Chan: What? These guys aren't really alive.

Snakeman: ..... I think we're corrupting her.

Snake-copy: I dig it! I dig it!

(The many Snake-copies burrow underground as the giant Magnet-copy shoots missiles out from its arms!)

Shadowman: WHAT!?

Hardman: Typical! It doesn't need its freakin' head!

Needlegal: I got this!

(Needlegal uses her high-powered needles to destroy the remaining bits of the giant Magnet-copy!)

Needlegal: That did it!

Magnetman: Yes, but look - the rest have escaped!


Shadowman: Hh. Not if I have anything to say about it.

(Shadowman grabs the head of one of his fallen clones and teleports back to the Technodrome.)

(The others follow and are not surprised at all as they see Shadowman hooking up cables to his clone's head.)

Magnetman: Ahh, I see what you're doing.

Shadowman: Yeah, I'm gonna use the Technodrome's sensors to reactivate this stupid head and see if it can't track it to its source.

Geminiman: Uh ..... are you sure it can do that?

Shadowman: Of course I'm not sure! This place was built by my insane copy and Dr. Light's team still hasn't gone through replacing all the systems. Bizarro me did pretty shoddy work when it comes to computers.

Geminiman: And ..... are you really any good with the techy stuff?

Shadowman: Oh, Gem, it isn't too hard. The input wire goes into the brain conduit, the output through the ear .... or something.

Topman: Or something!?

Shadowman: Oh just relax!

(The power goes out throughout the city for a moment as Shadowman powers up the connection.)


(The 'Maniacs look around nervously)


Shadowman: See? It worked! And look! The screen's showing us exactly where we need to go!


Topman: Hm. It looks like ..... a dot.

Shadowman: Yeah.

Topman: We're gonna have to refine this a bit.

Shadowman: Yeah. Or .....

Needlegal: Oh no.

Shadowman: I have a shortcut.

(Soon the 'Maniacs find themselves piled in a van driven by the consciousness of Shadowman's knock-off!)

Geminiman: What kinda stupid plan is this!?

Shadow-copy: Plan is nice like old spice!

Hardman: I hate to say it, but I agree with Gem! This is nuts, boss!

Shadowman: Guys, please. This is a clone of me! I know exactly how I think!

Shadow-copy: Right way wrong way! (The car veers dangerously to the left and the 'Maniacs struggle to stay in their seats.)

Topman: Damn it! I don't trust this thing to drive!

Shadowman: Nonsense! It's making excellent time.

Topman: We're gonna die!

Needlegal: Still, you gotta admit ..... it does drive exactly like Shadow. Maybe it does think like - OH MY GOD THERE'S PEOPLE IN FRONT OF US!

(The car screeches to a halt just in time! The startled people hurry on by.

Lan: You people almost killed us!

Shadowman, Shadow-copy: You didn't die or anything.

Hardman: Remind me never to let the boss drive again. Ever.

Shadowman: Quiet, it's not so -

(The van suddenly accelerates and Shadowman's words are lost as they begin their pursuit once more!)

Needlegal: You know ...... this place looks pretty familiar.

Hardman: Really?

Needlegal: Yeah, but I can't put my finger on it ...

Topman: Uh ...... do you think the van'll slow down before we crash into that abandoned building.

Shadowman: Sure! I mean ...... if he's anything like me. I mean.....

(The van can be heard snickering evilly.)

Shadowman: Aw, crap!

(The van explodes as it collides into the building! The wall crumbles under the impact!)


Hardman: *cough cough*!

Needlegal: Okay, big bro does do a better job parking than the copy! I'll admit that!

(Shadowman jumps down from the rafters).

Shadowman: Well, thanks for that at least.

Topman: .... what? How'd you.

Shadowman: It was -

All (except Top and Shadow): A hologram.


Shadowman: Hhmph.

???: What the HELL!? This is our HOME, you assholes!

???: Aw, shit. It's them!

Needlegal: It's you people again! The Wily attack force!

Multiman: That's the Wily Rescue Force, you idiot!

Barrageman: Unit Barrageman says you had best remember our team name!

Expressman: 'specially if you're knocking down our damn wall!

Hardman: Oh, yeah? We'll knock down more than the wall!

Shadowman: Hold up!

Hardman: What?

Shadowman: We have to do this properly.

Needlegal: "Properly"?

(Shadowman flashes a badge.)

Shadowman: Expressman, Multiman, Barrageman, and Doc Robot! You're all under arrest! This is a raid! You have the -

(Shadowman is knocked for a loop as Expressman attacks with his Solar Blasts!)

Expressman: Arrest this, copper!

Shadowman: God damn it! Get 'em!

(Hardman fights toe-to-toe with three Multimen!)

Hardman: So, it was always you behind those copies!

Multiman: (while decking the heavier robot) That's right! They made pretty good troops ..... especially after you guys started to mess with us!

(Barrageman fires his Ion Blasts as Topman and Shadowman dodge.)

Barrageman: Unit Barrageman has you in his sights!

Shadowman: "Unit Barrageman" is about to get a splitting headache!

Topman: Emphasis on splitting, I'm sure!

(Expressman avoids Needlegal's rapid needles with ease as he gloats).

Expressman: It's really your own fault! Putting yourselves up for sale ..... what the Hell were you thinking!?

Shadowman: (While pelting Barrageman with 'blades) SHUT UP!

(Hardman uses his big-ball attack to knock five Multimen down at once!)

Hardman: You guys are pretty smart for Wily's garbage heap helpers. I'll bet you can do math. So far it's three of you against all eight of us!

Doc Robot: (From the shadows) Ah, but we have more brains!

Shadowman: Oh yeah?

(Doc Robot flips a switch and the 'Maniacs collapse to the floor!)

Magnetman: What is this!?

Shadowman: (while dropping from the roof) YEAAAAGH!!

Topman: What the Hell?

Snakeman: It's ..... DAMN!

Spark Chan: What's going on?

Needlegal: I don't -

(Expressman uses this opening to deck Shadow's sister multiple times, splintering her resilient armor.)

Expressman: It's called leveling the playing field, sister!

Doc Robot: I have studied your copies! It was easy to make a machine to exploit their weaknesses, and yours too! It is too bad the females were not copied so I could not figure out how to affect them as well, but no matter, we have the advantage now! We do!

(Topman is caught off guard as Barrageman pelts him with laser blasts!)

Barrageman: And Unit Barrageman loves this idea!

(Spark Chan uses her electricity to defend against the oncoming horde of Multimen.)

Spark Chan: Don't make me hurt you!

Multiman: Hah hah hah! We've studied you posers! And we also know you're the pacifist!

(A Multiman crashes on Classi from above and she's thrown into unconsciousness.)

(Time passes. Soon the 'Maniacs awake.....)

???: Hey. They're awake.

Expressman: Who cares?  We can just drop them again if they try anything.

Doc Robot: Master will be so impressed! I can't wait to tell him all about this!

???:  Yeah, yeah, just leave my involvement out of it.

Mecha Energy: *screams shrilly inside of its Pokeball.

Expressman: Heh heh heh ..... it doesn't like that one bit!

Geminiman: What's .... what's going on here?

Spark Chan: That's Mecha Energy! How did you guys get that!?

Multiman: That's a good question.

???: They should know if they put their mind to it.

Topman: We gotta get outta here!

(Topman tries to activate his Top Spin attack, but finds he can't get his body to respond.)

Topman:  What's going on!?

Doc Robot: The restraints block your robotic "powers" through a complex series -

Hardman: We don't care!

(Hardman struggles against his bonds with visible force.)

???: Hurry up! Don't wait for them to escape! We have to activate Frankenstein now!

Doc Robot: Roger!

(Doc Robot pushes buttons on his computer terminal.)

Mecha Energy: *shrieks in pain and indignation*

Doc Robot: Energy levels are good.

Barrageman: Unit Barrageman calculates the probability of enemies escaping as "high".

Expressman:  Right. *snaps fingers*

(A dozen or so copies of the 'Maniacs come into the room).

Expressman: This should buy us some time.

???:  They had better not escape. You're the competent ones, that's why I came to you to get this done.

Expressman: Yeah, I don't see you helping much.

???: Hey, if this works you'll gain just as much as me!

Doc Robot: It's coming to life!!

Mecha Energy: *Makes low moaning sounds.*

???: Were you able to save Mecha Energy?

Doc Robot: Yes. But just barely.

???:  Great!

Needlegal: I really don't like the sound of this....

Shadowman: ....

Magnetman: We can't just stand here! (Magnetman struggles to force his bonds open, but his magnetic powers are just as useless as everyone else's!)

Magnetman: This is frustrating! Why can't I open these bonds!? This should be easy!

(A low rumble is heard as mechanical doors open.)

Expressman: That thing always gives me the creeps.

???:  That "thing" is the next evolution in robotics! You should feel honored at being allowed to witness history!

(Frankenstein hovers into view.)

Frankenstein:  *ROOOAAAARRR*

Spark Chan: It's hideous!!

Topman: How the Hell were you able to make such a monstrosity!?

???:  With your help, of course!

(The shadows drop from view and the mystery enemy is none other than....)

Topman: Nightmare Top!?

N-Top: Oh, yes. Making all your dreams come true.

Frankenstein: .....

Shadowman: Then you're the one who hired Carmen Sandiego to steal the Ark!

N-Top: Correct.

Shadowman: I had a feeling it was you. You have access to all of Topman's memories, including the information on how to hack our security systems.

N-Top: And with that, I was able to get a powerful and versatile source of energy - Mecha Energy!!

Shadowman: But that is NOT Autobot technology.

N-Top: No ..... this is technology those Sinister Six losers gave me. Thanks to the brain module of Bizarro Shadowman!

the 'Maniacs: !???!

N-Top: So, they didn't tell you exactly what the six stole, eh?


Shadowman: No.

Hardman: So you were able to build this thing thanks to Bizarro's brain!?

N-Top: Doc Robot here did the majority of the building. I'm more of an ..... idea man.

Doc Robot: Bizarro's brain had schematics of every body he's ever used. And I used that to create this!

Shadowman:  Then the only reason we're still alive is ....

N-Top: Fresh meat for my little baby here.

(Frankenstein begin to examine Magnetman. He shivers as it uses a metallic "finger" to scan his body's systems.)

N-Top: Frankenstein is as immortal as the Limited armor from the alternate reality! He uses technology from my own Transmetal armor to give him greater endurance! There's a healthy dose of Transformer technology to enable him to change form as the need arises. And, of course, a healthy dose of Borg technology to add some finer details.

Magnetman: Uhhh ..... I could use some help here!

N-Top: Its core processor is powered by the villainous Mecha Energy! Soon it'll have the abilities inherent in your own Transmetal 2 armor. I suppose I could have used dead meat for that, but really ...

(N-Topman grins as Frankenstein grows sharp instruments and begins to dismantle Magnet's arms)

N-Top: What fun is that? And after its body has integrated your systems, it'll get the perfect brain ....

Doc Robot: Indeed.

(Doc Robot flips a switch and the 'Maniacs along with N-Topman scream in Pain! Frankenstein continues to dismantle Magnetman's arms)

N-Top: WAAAAAHHHHGH! What .... what is this!?

(Multiman lifts N-Topman off the ground.)

Multiman: This is called a "double-cross", weenie.

(Multiman inserts N-Topman into his chest cavity.)

Multiman: Like we'd ever let you control that thing!

Expressman: We have our own ideas, "idea-man". Hah hah hah!

Doc Robot: Multi! Take him away for further study!

Multiman: Right!

(Multiman walks off with N-Topman furiously pounding on his interior.)

Doc Robot: One down. Eight to go!

Magnetman: It's eating my arm!!!

Frankenstein: (Whirrs silently before Magnetman as it takes parts and analyses their structure. Melted transmetal drips down its intake as it reduces Magnetman's left arms into slag to seamlessly integrate it into its own structure.)

Shadowman: (thought) Clearly this thing isn't in the same class as Bizarro. There's no mind there at all. It's just eating ..... and it's absorbing technology much better than Bizarro ever did! None of his systems were as integrated as this thing's.)

Needlegal: Uh .... We seem to be in a bit of a jam here ....

Expressman: Heh heh heh ..... like candy from a baby ....

(And at that very moment!)


(Rubble falls onto Frankenstein and Magnet is freed from its grasp!)

Frankenstein: RAAAAHHHHH!!!

(Doc Robot, Expressman, and Barrageman turn towards what was once the main entrance to the lab!)

Expressman: OUR HOUSE!! You creeps are gonna pay for that!

Barrageman: Unit Barrageman does not recognize offenders.

Doc Robot: ....

(The dust clears revealing three heavily armored robots....)

???: Unhand the 'Maniacs and put your hands up! No funny moves!

Doc Robot: Certainly not! Nothing funny at all!

Needlegal: Those are ...!

Geminiman: I can see it too.....

(The room fills with Mech copies!)

???: Citizens, resisting arrest is a serious offence!

Shadow Copy: Funny is this one!

Hard Copy: Borg will he go like? "Resistance is useless!"

Magnet Copy: To resist is human but Godlike it is to achieve victory!

Special Forces: We're the Special Forces! You do not want to mess with the three of us!

Special Forces: That's Right!

Expressman: More lawmen...? I HATE you pigs!


Hard Copy: YEE-HAW!!!

(Hardman Copies run at the special forces and, with one mighty sweep of their fists, the special forces destroy five Hard Copies all at once!)

Special Forces: Secure this facility!

Special Forces: Roger!

Spark Chan: Those look exactly like those - EEEEKK!!

(Spark Chan is hit by debris from crudely copied 'Maniacs.)

Geminiman: Spark!

Magnetman: You people will pay for that!

Special Forces: We'll make 'em pay, sir! (Pounds a Magnet Copy into pieces!)

Shadowman: (while slipping out of his bonds) Come on, guys! We gotta get after the Rescue Force before they escape.

Needlegal: How the Heck did you get free!?

Shadowman: Trade secret. Now hold on while I free the rest of you. (Shadowman begins to pick Needle's lock.)

Hardman: Uh .... boss?

Shadowman: Yes? Wh - OHH!!!

(Shadowman narrowly avoids being hit by one of Frankenstein's tentacles!)

Shadowman: Damn this thing.... (Shadowman chucks some Shadow Blades at Mecha Energy)

Frankenstein: Raaaaaahhhhhh.... (Swipes away the Shadow Blades away with its wires.)

Shadowman: (while dodging energy bursts) Dang it, dang it ...

Geminiman: Hey! What about the rest of us!?

Shadowman: Little busy at the moment, Gem!

Spark Chan: (rises from the rubble) What was that truck that hit me .... ?

Magnetman: Spark Chan! You're all right!

Spark Chan: Yeah .... I might be a flimsy robot, but I'm still tough!

(Sparks flicker across Classi's fingertips.)

Spark Chan: Give me a moment to get you guys loose.

(Meanwhile, the Special Forces battle hordes of Mechanical Copies.)

Shadow Copy: Desist, do not resist! GAHH!!

(One of the Forces rips the heads from a Shadow Copy.)

Special Forces: This is no good. I can't find the main perpetrators anywhere.

Special Forces: Our first duty is to free the Mechanical Maniacs. We have to get to them!

Special Forces: Allow me....

(One member of the Special Forces raises a glowing fist and shoots a concentrated burst of energy at a host of cheaply made Mechanical Maniacs copies.)

Magnet Copy: GAHH!!!

Gemini Copy: But I one of group!

Snake Copy: This is vengeance calls for ...

Special Forces: YES!

(Explosions are heard as lab equipment reaches critical mass and explodes!)

Special Forces: Crap.

(More explosions rock the room as the interconnecting equipment goes haywire!)

Topman: This place is going to Hell!

Magnetman: (Steadying himself on partially disassembled legs) Where's that bastard Doc Robot!? Where is he!?

Hardman: He's gone. Just like the rest of them.

Magnetman: Then -

(Shadowman appears in front of his team while on his giant frog!)

Shadowman: Little help!?

(Shadowman leaps out of the way as an energy ball narrowly misses him.)

Frankenstein: RAAAHHH!!!

Geminiman: How the Hell can we beat that thing!?

(Gemini Fires a Gemini Laser! Frankenstein is hit, but seems unaffected.)

(A nearby container bursts and Mecha Energy flies free!)

Mecha Energy: SCREEEEE!!!!

Special Forces: Look out!!

(Mecha Energy dives into one of the three Special Forces! The robot sizzles and sparks as the creature drains him.)

Special Forces: What can we do, commander!?

(Mecha Energy emerges from the powerless and short-circuited Special Forces member.)

Mecha Energy: SCREEEEEEE!!!

Special Forces: This is a Pulzar scenario. Initiate the "Bad Energy Busters"!

Special Forces: Roger!

(The Special Forces level their busters at Mecha Energy and begin to fire!)


(Mecha Energy backs away and pulses in pain as the Special Forces don't stop their barrage.)

Special Forces: Keep at it! He's weakening!

(Mecha Energy seems to grow smaller and the Special Forces team advance on it.)

Mecha Energy: ..... Hrrrrrrr ....

Special Forces: SIR! It looks like - !

(With a burst of energy, destroying several onlooking 'Maniacs copies, Mecha Energy bursts through the roof and out of sight!)

Special Forces: .... well ... that takes care of that....

(The Warehouse, now on fire, continues to be overwhelmed by Mechanical Maniacs copies....)

Snake Copy: Don't let up!

Magnet Copy: Chase after victory!

Hardman: Winning is the option!

Frankenstein: GRAAAAAHHH!!!

Hardman: Alright, it's clobberin' time!

(Rubble falls from the ceiling as structural supports begin to fail.)

Hardman: Or maybe not ....

Frankenstein: GRAAAAHH!!!

Topman: So, what's the plan?

Shadow Copy: Attack! Attack! Attack!

Shadowman: I say we make a strategic retreat!

Magnetman: We run away!?

Snakeman: Uh ..... considering the options, I don't think we have much choice....

Needlegal: Uh .... running away is good for me....

Magnetman: But it's running away!!

Special Forces: Sirs! (bats away a Snake Copy) Are you all right?

Shadowman: Yes, fine! We've decided to teleport back to HQ. This place is going to fall apart any -

(The roof begins to cave in as explosions in the adjacent room rock the building.)

Shadowman: Just go! Now!

(The 'Maniacs and the Special Forces teleport out of the building as it falls apart around them!)

Frankenstein: RAAAHHHH!!!!!

(Back at the Technodrome, the 'Maniacs watch satellite footage of the area.)

Geminiman: This is bad .... the copies of us are on mass production. They're swarming the abandoned warehouse district. Eventually they're going to make it to the actual manufacturing district.

Needlegal: What's worse is that, according to Dr, Light, Mecha Energy is going towards some power plants at an alarming rate. Machines are going haywire as he runs through the streets.

Spark Chan: But what's even WORSE is that that evil Frankenstein creature is making a mess everywhere he goes! Oh, I don't think it even has any kind of plan! It's just destroying things and eating up whatever looks complicated....

Magnetman: We need a squadron of those Special Forces robots to help us clean this mess up! Don't forget about tracking down the Wily Rescue Force and N-Topman.

Shadowman: (Turns off the communicator.) The chief wants to speak to us. Personally.

Needlegal: The Chief!?

Spark Chan: Oh my! We've never actually seen him.

Shadowman: And when we do we can ask him why Bizarro's Gamma Units are acting as our "Special Forces"!

To be Continued ....


Classi Cal as .....
Spark Chan
Raijin as .....
Psycho Magnet as .....
Hadrian Howell as .....
    Nightmare as .....
Lennon as .....
Kenta (Kassidy) Eigen as .....
Gauntlet as .....


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