By Gauntlet (Shadowman), and Gary (Iceman)
Andon: Well, this is it folks: our last epilogue.
Sparkman: Well, unless Gauntlet decides to write another one.
Andon: Oi, will you get out? This is my job! Anyway, the aftermath of Iceman vs. Red has left the Sinister Six at a great loss. Iceman has been destroyed, and now our heroes are left without a base due to the Decepticon's recent rampage.* So the Sinister Six gathered up what belongings they had left and decided to take refuge somewhere for the time being.
Raijin: You want to stay here? In The Ark?
Nightmare: But why? Can't you find your own base to stay at?
Tim: WHAT!? AFTER WHAT YOU DID TO OUR BASE... WE LET YOU STA...
(Tim is abruptly cut off by Andon.)
Andon: Come on, man... we can take a hint...
(The Sinister Six... er Five soon left the front of the Ark and walked away with heads slung down.)
Gauntlet: Ahhhh... Get back here, guys. Sure we'll let you stay!
Gauntlet: Sure! We're good buds, right? Just be sure to chip in your part of the bills, and keep the place tidy and...
Gauntlet: Just kidding, man! Lighten up!
Tim: It's kind of hard after losing a valued member and our first base.
Lennon: Well, now you know how we feel. We've gone through numerous members and bases, but we've always pulled through and remained strong! Right!?
(Hardman comes in with a keg.)
Hadrian: UUUURRRPP! Ahhhh... that's the stuff there... (pats the keg.)
IRA: Can't say no to that, right!? (Grabs the keg and drinks right off the tap.)
(Everyone looks at IRA strangely.)
Hadrian: I thought you were a recovering alcoholic?
IRA: To hell with that! (Drinks more.)
Hadrian: Now that's mah boy!
(The following morning, The Sinister
SixFive finish unpacking -- since they had very little to unpack -- and relaxed.)
Gauntlet: Ahhhh... the sun shines on this glorious base. (Grabs headgear and baseball bat.) Time to wake everyone up.
Jason: Oh yeah!?
Jason: Oh yeah!?
Gauntlet: What the hell is goin' on here!?
Jason: We were fighting on who thinks you're the best leader!
Gauntlet: 'Zat so? (Smiles with glee.)
Scott: You think he is!
Jason: No, you think he is!
Scott: No you!
Gauntlet: ... ... ... ... ...
Tim: (Snickers evilly.) (Thinks to himself.) So far... my plan is going perfectly...
Nightmare: Soooo... how long you all plan on staying?
Classi: Topman! Be nice! After all, they opened up their base for you.
Razz: Yes, you have to let that positive energy flow!
Nightmare: Well, it's nice to have you in the base too, Class. Although I'm not too sure who invited you ...
Classi: Scott did.
Scott: Yup! This will be great! We can create awesome recipes together!
Classi: Yes, hun! It will be splendid!
Jonathan: (Stomach grumbles) Speaking of food, when are we going to eat? I'm starved... after that whole Iceman vs Red thing, and that housewarming party, I could use some good relaxation!
Needle Gal: Soon. Right now we need to think of which rooms to offer our new guests.
Nightmare: Who won't be staying long... right?
(Everyone looks to Nightmare.)
Nightmare: Ah, come on... Just a little joke.
Meanwhile, the Mechanical Maniacs (along with their unexpected travelling companion, Captain N's Iceman) are travelling within the time stream. Although it's been days for the Sinister Six of the past, it's been mere moments for our present-day heroes.
Topman: You've got some 'splaining to do.
Snakeman: Was that another Quint? Do you go crazy in the future, come back, and try to wreck everything?
Iceman CN: There were two Quints!?
Geminiman: Come now, you have to have seen them.
Iceman CN: I saw something. I thought maybe there was a Quint audition since there was an Iceman one. But Quint is less popular, so only two showed up. That's what I thought.
Quint: Oi, what? Of course not! No, that's not me, it was Rockman Shadow.
Magnetman: And who, pray, is "Rockman Shadow?"
Quint: Well, when Dr. Wily 'created' me, he made a prototype first.
Magnetman: Why would he do that?
Quint: You'd have to ask him. Anyway, despite being more powerful -
Magnetman: Because the unfinished prototype is always more powerful than the refined, polished end product.
Quint: Shadow went off his rocker. He stole a Time Skimmer of his own and decided to go on a rampage across time and space. I've been chasing him ever since. Well, ever since I obtained a Time Skimmer of my own and decided to police the time stream at any rate.
Needlegal: Wait a second here, you talk like this isn't the first time he's done this!
Quint: Well it's not.
Quint: My life doesn't revolve around you people. Don't expect a memo every time I do something.
Needlegal: The world doesn't revolve around us and our adventures!?
Geminiman: Hold on, I remember Rockman Shadow now. Didn't he cause some trouble in Symphony City? Wasn't he beaten by Megaman ... or Bass ... or one of them?*
(*In Rockman and Forte: Challenger from the Future)
Quint: Yes, that happens, but this Rockman Shadow is before then. Oh, so, guys? No killing him, alright? That would seriously muck up the time stream.
Geminiman: Ugh! Time travel. It's one of those things you hear about and think is so great. Until you actually do it.
Quint: Oi! Come now. It isn't so bad and you've had fun on our adventures. Admit it.
Geminiman: Well ... maybe sometimes ...
Snakeman: I've got the sensors tracking the unique energy signature Iceman's Transmetal Armour has at this point and have cross indexed with the chronal energy of its proper place in time. Who knew his fight with Red would make his armour easier to track?
Needlegal: Good news! So where's the first piece of that armour at?
Snakeman: You won't believe it.
Narrator: At Breakfast.
(The Mechs watch helplessly as the Sinister Six feud.)
Scott: I'm hungry! Can we eat now!?
Tim: I'm already ordering out for breakfast. (Is calling up a restaurant.)
IRA: You're ordering Chinese, right?
Tim: For breakfast? No, that ain't happening. We're having a normal, everyday breakfast this time.
IRA: But today isn't "every day" it's TODAY! I want Chinese...
Jason: I don't care what you get, just get something already.
Razz: Hey now, can't we stay positive? Breakfast is the most important meal of the day so it's important that it be positively charged.
(Tim glances at the staring Mechs and laughs to himself.)
Scott: Yeah, me too! I'm so hungry I could eat Gauntlet's socks!
Tim: Mooby's it is.
IRA: But I want Chinese.
Tim: (Picks up the sofa over his head) I SAID MOOBY'S! END OF STORY!
IRA: (Goes outside and lifts up Gauntlet's car.) I SAID CHINESE!!!
Gauntlet: You are going to be careful with those, right... ?
Tim: (Hangs up phone.) Okay... okay... Chinese it is!
Jason: End of that argument...
Needle Gal: (Whispering to Classi) Is it me... or are the Sinister Six acting a bit childish...?
Classi: I think anyone who joins the Sinister Six might actually be this childish.
The present day Mechanical Maniacs journey to a certain, agonizingly familiar location and deal with an annoying guest star ...
Comic Book Guy: No, I am afraid that piece of Transmetal Armour is not for sale. It is a part of my personal collection and I am very attached to it.
Sparkman: Come on, now. Everything has its price.
Comic Book Guy: Not this. It is a part of, what I am told, a limited edition four piece set.
Hardman: That's one way of looking at it, I guess.
Comic Book Guy: It is signed by its owner - the late Gary Martin. I did this myself at one of his "superhero conventions." It's also signed by his two friends, Gauntlet, also known as Shadowman, and Benjamin, also known as Heatman, also known as Magma Dragoon.
Hardman: Wait, it is!?
Shadowman: Hold up, lemme see that.
(Shadow and Hard take a close look at the piece of Transmetal Armour.)
Hardman: That does look like my signature.
Shadowman: Wait, I remember this. I remember YOU! Didn't you say this was for your nephew!?
Comic Book Guy: Erm ... he didn't want it?
Topman: Hold the phone, how far back did this piece go!? The Superhero convention hasn't happened in years!
Quint: Well, Shadow did use chronal energy to disable Iceman and get this armour. I guess it went back a ways.
Needlegal: What I want to know is how you know all about this armour.
Comic Book Guy: I used my collectible Star Trek Tricorder to analyze it. It was quite reliable.
Magnetman: Alright! I'm out. I'll come back when we track down the next piece.
Hardman: (Whispering) Why are we dealing with this guy? Let's just beat the pants off him and grab it.
Sparkman: (Whispering) I'm with tons of fun. What's the problem with just grabbing it?
Shadowman: (Whispering) Video surveillance. We do not want images of ourselves spreading around - who knows what could happen? We have to keep our footprint small.
Quint: (Whispering) Ah, you're learning.
Needlegal: Alright, now look. Everything has a price. I'm sure we can meet yours. Come on. Name it. go nuts! I dare you!
Narrator: During Breakfast.
Gauntlet comes into the room seeing Jason and Scott sprawled out on the couch, Tim on the floor, IRA sitting against the wall, and Andon sitting in front of the television eating their breakfast.
(The Sinister Six members eat and shove food into their mouths noisily.)
Gauntlet: (Turns off the TV.)
The Sinister Six: HEY!
Gauntlet: God invented a kitchen for a reason: to keep ants out of the TV room. We are going to eat breakfast in the kitchen so we don't attract bugs.
Jason: Makes sense..
Andon: Sure dude.
(In the kitchen.)
Tim: Happy, Gauntlet?
Jason: Good, commence pigging out.
(The S6 members eat and shove food into their mouths noisily.)
Needle Gal: STOP! We are going to say grace first. We always say grace!
Raijin: We do?
Hadrian: Since when?
Needle Gal: We do have guests... now, let's...
Scott: (Interrupts) We paid for this food, God, so ... thanks for nothing.
(The S6 members eat and shove food into their mouths noisily.)
Needle Gal: No! We're gonna do this right.
(Everyone puts their silverware down and closes their eyes.)
Needle Gal: (Clears throat) Dear Lord... thank you for this Chinese bounty, even though our S6 buddies called without asking... Sometimes I wonder what is going on with these guys... who am I kidding!? Why can't they be like other teams!? Are they going to leave soon? Can't you make them leave!? (She moans loudly.)
Tim: Amen! Let's eat!
(The S6 members eat and shove food into their mouths noisily.)
Nightmare: I think I've lost my appetite.
Scott: (With noodles hanging from his mouth.) What?
Nightmare: Haven't you guys ever heard of table manners!?
IRA: What's that? And more importantly, can it be eaten?
(The S6 members continue to shove food into their mouths noisily.)
Nightmare: Oh, the humanity...
Gauntlet: (Watching carefully) Alright... alright. I get it.
Classi: What do you mean, Gauntlet?
Lennon: I think I know...
Jonathan: Yeah... me too.
Gauntlet: This is Tim's revenge for us trashing his base. Quite cleverly played out. I must agree.
Tim: Yeah... how do you like that, huh?
Nightmare: All this was just revenge? Oiii... I knew nobody could eat like that!
Scott: (Devours the rest of the food.)
Nightmare: Or not...
Gauntlet: Yeah well, you got your revenge, so can you please behave now?
Tim: Okay, but it was fun!
(The Other Six agree.)
(Everyone laughs except for Nightmare, who doesn't seem to find it funny.)
In the Time Skimmer, the Mechs track down the second piece of Iceman's armour.
Hardman: That greedy, greedy bastard.
Needlegal: *sigh* Let it go, Hardman.
Hardman: He asked for a signed copy of Action Comics Number One!
Needlegal: I know he did. I was there.
Topman: It's not like it was a big hassle to take the Skimmer back to 1938, spend 10¢, then get a confused Jerry Siegel to scrawl his name on it.
Hardman: It's the principle! A jerk like that doesn't DESERVE that treasure! You should have let me beat that guy up.
Magnetman: I do not see what you two love about them funny books.
Hardman: Funny books!? They're modern mythology!
Magnetman: Just so long as I am never involved in that kind of scenario ever again. "Springfield." What state is that even in!?
(The Mechs walk out of the Time Skimmer.)
Magnetman: Great, a garbage dump. This is not looking much better.
(Alarms start blazing out at all areas of the dump.)
Shadowman: Looks like this is more straightforward.
Magnetman: Hot dog! New we're talking.
(Robot cockroaches fly up from the ground only to get pounded by the Mechs.)
Needlegal: YYYYYYEEEUGH! Get them away from me!
Topman: They aren't actual bugs.
Needlegal: They're close enough to freak me out.
(The robot bugs are followed by shambling robot "zombies" made out of spare parts. They fall easily.)
Geminiman: Ah hah hah hah! This is fun!
Hardman: (While crushing a zombie's head) I agree!
Iceman CN: I - I'm scared. I - I think I'm melting.
Hardman: Come on!
Iceman CN: Can we go back inside?
(Junkman explodes from a pile of junk.)
Junkman: MY TREASURES!!
Needlegal: (Whispering) Is this the same Junkman that was in Drastic Measures?
Sparkman: I honestly have no idea. I was never close with those guys.
Junkman: My one of a kind collectibles. You've ... you've destroyed them! By gum, you've destroyed them all!
Topman: (Whispering) Hey, I think he's the same guy we know from the Underground!
Hardman: (Whispering) Can't be. That Junkman would be furious with us.
Junkman: My precious, precious collectibles. My one-of-a-kind items! Why!? WHY!? What did I ever do to you people!?
Topman: (Whispering) Not necessarily. I mean it's been ... what? Twenty years now? The world went through a whole war between now and then. I wouldn't remember us. Hell, I don't remember us until I'm reminded. Twenty years is a long time.
Junkman: AND YOU ARE NOT EVEN LISTENING TO ME!
Junkman: Dad gum ... dad gum ...
Quint: Oi! We're here for Iceman's Transmetal Armour! Just hand it over and we'll just be on our way.
Junkman: Dad gum, it's too late to try talking your way outta this like some reasonable fella!
Magnetman: Hah! Now it's a party.
Junkman: GARBAGEMAN! It's time to bring out da trash.
(Another pile of junk explodes as Garbageman awakens.)
Magnetman: Whoa! That's a big friend you got there.
Junkman: Garbageman! These trespassers have come onto our property uninvited!
Garbageman: Bad ... trespassers ... !
Junkman: I recognize these particular trespassers. I MARK YOU! You're that OTHER Mega Man 3 team ...
Shadowman: Don't say it, don't say it ...
Junkman: Gamma's Disciples!
Needlegal: Are we developing some kind of reputation?
Garbageman: DISCIPLES ... BAD! HURT BROTHER GAMMA!
Garbageman: Garbage attack!!
Narrator: That very night, back at the Ark.
Tim: Laugh now. But I'll be the one who has the last laugh. Yeah.
(Tim looks at a bunch of plans that he had cleverly written down.)
Tim: Wreck my base, will they? Heh. Revenge! REVENGE! He thinks it's over, but I'm a slow burn kind of guy.
(Soon, a strange sound is heard in Tim's room.)
Tim: What's that? I wonder if it's G spying on me. Crap... He'll be onto my plan.
Tim: (Raises his voice a bit higher so the sneaky ninja would hear him.) Ummm... well I'm glad the Mechs offered us some space! It sure was nice of them...
(A puff of white smoke appears, but it isn't Gauntlet.)
Tim: Who the heck...
(Before Tim can realize what's going on, he's dragged quickly into a portal.)
(The next morning...)
Scott: How about a little lemon?
Classi: Mmmm... might make it a bit too sour, sweety, but I'll give it a go this time.
Razz: It smells delightful, regardless.
Gauntlet: (Comes in) Something smells nice in here.
Hadrian: Hmmm... I'll say. Let me at it!
Jason: (Already sitting at the table) Hold on, big guy. They haven't added Scott's special sauce yet.
Hadrian: Special Sauce? Do I dare ask?
IRA: No, not if you want to live... Hah! (IRA comes in with hands full of booze.)
Hadrian: Where'd you get those!?
IRA: Just found them lying around.
Hadrian: They didn't happen to be lying around in a locked cabinet... would they?
(Before IRA can answer, Andon comes running in.)
Andon: Anyone seen Tim? He's not in his room!
Gauntlet: Maybe one of the others is giving him a tour of the place.
Needle Gal: (Comes in as well) El Negativeo, Bro. Jonathan is still asleep, Tops is still practicing his Beyblading skills, Raijin's doing something with his custom Navi, and Lennon, well, why would he give Gutsman a tour?
Gauntlet: Hmmmm... that is very odd indeed.
Andon: I'm a bit worried. He's an early bird, yes, but he usually shows himself in the morning.
Gauntlet: Bah! You Sinister Six are worry warts. I'm sure he's just fine!
(Suddenly, Xelloss appears.)
Xelloss: I don't know, Mr. Gauntlet... it seems that Tim has disappeared without a trace!
Jason: (Grabs Xelloss by the cloth knowing that the priest was never up to any good.) WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM!! SPILL IT!
Xelloss: (Simply thwacks Cutman back and fixes his cloth.) During this turn of events, I'm afraid I'm not behind it.
Gauntlet: I see.
Jason: You can't believe him, can you?
Raijin: (Comes in.) Nobody believes anything he does or says anymore.
Andon: Have you seen Tim, Raj?
(The other Mechs are flustered. Even Xelloss)
Raijin: (Eye flickering.) What did you call me?
Gauntlet: (Whispering) Ummm... I think I'll help Scott, Razz, and Classi over here... Heh... heh.
Andon: I was just asking if you've seen...
Raijin: For the last time!! It's RAI! Not RAJ! Get it right for Pete's sake! It's not that HARD!!
Hadrian: You rang?
Raijin: Shut it. (He says sipping a glass of milk.) And no, I haven't seen him since last night.
Andon: Hmmm... (Leaves the room, worried.)
(It's then a beep goes off on Raijin's email.)
Raijin: Got mail, I'm off! (He zips out.)
Gauntlet: Heh, forgot to mention one of Raijin's pet peeves.
Scott: Breakfast is almost ready!
Classi: I think you'll like this dish! German Pancakes with Lemon Butter! And of course everyone's fave, Mango Juice!
Hadrian: (Smells the air.) Smells good! FEED ME!
(In Raijin's room, the reptile is checking his inbox.)
Raijin: That's odd... I could have sworn I...
(A puff of smoke comes into the room and a figure appears.)
???: Another one for my beloved collection! Come eeeere!!
Raijin: Who the heck...? (Gets pulled into a portal.)
Elsewhere, the Mechanical Maniacs have resolved their differences with Junkman ...
Magnetman: I must say, this all worked out splendidly.
Hardman: Eh. I'm left unsatisfied.
Needlegal: I can't believe you're all related!
Brain Bot: Well, Garbage and I certainly are. The good Doctor Light, well, he wasn't too happy that Garbage wound up with subnormal intelligence.
Garbageman: Garbage dumb. (sob)
Bondman: Well, it's alright. We may be rejects, but we can be rejects together!
Picketman: I'll say. Light took one look at me and said "nope!" That's how I wound up here.
Quint: I feel just awful.
Junkman: Dad gum. And all my beauties are gone. (sob)
Quint: Well, it's as Brain Bot said. You needed to clean up anyway, right?
Junkman: I ... I guess so.
Bondman: Where will we go now? What will we do? You've wrecked our house!
Shadowman: In fairness it was already a wreck. Why do you guys live in a dump, anyway?
Topman: Yeah, you could live anywhere you want! Why not live on a tropical island?
Picketman: An island for rejected robots?
Garbageman: An island for robots like Garbage!?
Bondman: I dunno, it sounds expensive...
Brain Bot: I'll aid you in obtaining funding! I have some ties with the government. I can work something out.
Picketman: We'll call it ... Rejected Robot Ranch! Oh! And we'll have rides! And games!
Junkman: I can see it now! A new start on life! No more hoarding. I'll kick the habit!
(Junkman shakes the Mechs' hands before they board the Time Skimmer.)
Needlegal: Think he'll make it?
Geminiman: You've seen him back home. He obviously doesn't.
Sparkman: I hope they do make their crazy island idea. They deserve better than to hang out in some junkyard.
Quint: As do I. Well, we have the second piece. Time to track down the third.
Narrator: Later in Andon's room, in the Ark.
Andon: Maybe Gauntlet is right... maybe ol' Tim is just out for a stroll. He does that sometimes without telling someone...
(Something appears in Andon's room.)
Andon: Although it's quite careless doing that... I mean what if something happened...
???: Oooo... your armour is nice! I want it too!
(Andon is dragged into the portal.)
Elsewhere, a familiar foe is conversing with a very unlikely one...
Kefka: Uggggh... my Sinister Six Collection won't be complete without a Transmetal Iceman!
Doc Robot: I can't clone someone who is already dead. Although I do have a Joe assigned to Iceman's body. I can't build his armour right now.
Kefka: But my collection is incomplete!
Doc Robot: Ohhh, this is no fair! Master wanted those Transmetal Armours, they were never meant for you!
Kefka: I've said before that I don't care what your master wants! I want Transmetal Armour! Make it and you get to go back to your master and serve him yet again. If you do a good job, maybe his foes will wind up as a pile of scrap. And then who cares about some cruddy old armour, eh? After this piece landed in my lap, I just had to get them all.
Doc Robot: Oh, goodie! Master would be so pleased! I'll show him he can rely on me and not that smelly old Bass! But, um, I still can't make the armour.
Doc Robot: You only have a fourth of the armour! What can I do with that!?
Rockman Shadow: *ahem*
Kefka: (Whirls around.) Who's there!? How did you get in here!?
Rockman Shadow: Never mind that. Here. Take this. I'm sure it'll help.
Doc Robot: It's ... oh, boy! It's another piece of the Iceman Transmetal Armour!
Kefka: Can you finish that armour now?
Doc Robot: I might! I think I can! Ohhh! Master will be so proud of me!
Kefka: It's for me you dolt!
Rockman Shadow: And what about the other Transmetal Armours? The ones worn by the Sinister Six and Mechanical Maniacs?
Kefka: Oh, I can't remove all trace of them completely. I need to subject them all to various games. You see, Doc Robot has already removed their armour and put it on drones created from Sniper Joes. Iceman's Drone is almost complete!
Drone: Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! Ha. Ha. Ha.
Doc Robot: It still needs work.
Kefka: But the Mechs have their own chance to regain their armour.
Rockman Shadow: What? Why?!
Kefka: Because that's how it works. I can't just take their armour. That's no fun. It has to be earned. The Mechs still have a connection to their armour and the only way to sever it is to -
Rockman Shadow: No! No, that's stupid.
Rockman Shadow: If you have the armour, end this farce and end them all.
Kefka: I don't know why I'm putting up with ... hm ..
Doc Robot: Doc Robot's head feels ...
???: Don't mind my friend. He can be a little intense.Rockman Shadow: You'd be "intense" if you kept hearing those blasted drums hammering away all the time! Now you tell me why we should let this farce continue!
???: Because eliminating the armour isn't the goal. If I had wanted to do that then we could simply have stolen it before the Six even discovered it after Iceman and Red's little fight.
Rockman Shadow: Then what is the game here!?
???: To see what happens of course! Will the Six lose their armour? Will the Mechs? And if they do, then can time right itself? Hooo ... it'll be fun to find out!
Gauntlet awakens inside of a dark, nondescript room that seems to have been made off discarded bits of a fortress of some sort.
Gauntlet: Where am I? What is this place?
Drone Shadowman: You're in Kefka's realm now.
Gauntlet: Another imitator!? Holy crap, what is it with you people!? Get your own game, damn it! My team is supposed to be original! I'm my own person, gad damn you and the creep who made you!
Drone Shadowman: Uh ...
Gauntlet: Wait, did you say Kefka? (groan) This is Lennon's dream battle, isn't it? What is this about and what are you doing in my clothes? What kind of stupid prank is this!?
Drone Shadowman: *humph* Someone like you clearly lacks the temperament to succeed at these challenges.
(A special Shadow Blade lands on the ground.)
Gauntlet: (Tries to grab it but... )
Drone Shadowman: (Also tries to grab it.)
Drone Shadowman: So... we both try to touch it. Do you know what this means?
Gauntlet: You just give up and give it to me?
Drone Shadowman: No... It's Xiaolin Showdown!
Gauntlet: *sigh* Of course it is.
(Drums start playing)
Doc Robot: (From a loudspeaker.) That's right! You have to fight a Xiaolin Showdown for the possession of the Special Shadow Blade!
Gauntlet: (Who in the world is that?) And what exactly makes this Shadow Blade so special?
Doc Robot: It represents your Transmetal Armour, dummy!
Gauntlet: Hm, I see. So I guess whoever retains ownership of this "special" Shadow blade claims my Transmetal Armour. It seems rather unfair that you're already equipped with it.
Drone Shadowman: Deal with it! The contest is both of us fighting on pillars over a large sea of water!
(The stage appears and both are standing on pillars.)
Drone Shadowman: The first to fall off... loses!
(The Drone creates three Shadowmen that stand on three separate pillars.)
Drone Shadowman: I have all your Transmetal powers. Holograms! Wooden duplicates! Kunai! Frogs! Swords! What do you have? Only your base powers. You cannot hope to win!
Gauntlet: It's a pickle alright. (Flings another special Shadow Blade into the sea.)
Drone Shadowman: You fool! (Dives in after it.)
Gauntlet: Hm, except I can generate an endless supply of Shadow Blades that look the same as this "special" one. I guess you can steal my clothes, but you can't steal my brain.
(The stage disappears as Gauntlet wins.)
Narrator: Topman is engaged in a battle of Dance Dance Revolution with his own drone clone...
Nightmare: My DDR skills are the stuff of nightmares!
Drone Topman: HAH! I have been programmed with all of your moves!
Narrator: The Snakemen are playing twister.
Drone Snakeman: This armour actually makes Twister harder.
Raijin: Heh heh heh.
Drone Snakeman: Blast these shoulder pads!
Narrator: Gutsman and Hardman are in a tag team wrestling match!
Tim: Too bad Jacob ain't here, he'd love this.
Hadrian: Drinks're on me after I clobber dese guys!
Drone Gutsman: These losers think they can win, even without their armour?
Drone Hardman: That's a funny joke.
Narrator: The Cutmen engage in a duel of hair cutting.
Rita Repulsa: Make me pretty!
Beastor: BEASTOR NO LIKE HAIRCUT!!
Drone Cutman: Who thought of this challenge?
Narrator: The Needles engage in a singing competition.
Drone Needle Gal: ♬ Anything you can do, I can do better!
I can do anything better than you!♬
Needle Gal: ♬No you can't!♬
Drone Needle Gal: ♬Yes, I can!♬
Needle Gal: ♬No, you can't!♬
Drone Needle Gal: ♬Yes, I can!♬
Needle Gal: ♬No, you can't!♬
Drone Needle Gal: ♬Yes, I can, Yes, I can!♬
Narrator: Magnetman engages in a magnetic tug of war as he and the Drone Magnet are attached to a single steel rope and both are using their magnetic powers to try and push the other away!
Drone Magnetman: Hah hah hah! My magnetic powers are ten times as powerful as yours! I truly am Magnet the Mighty!
Jonathan: That wasn't me! I never said that.
Drone Magnetman: ♬Magnet the Mighty, he's very tidy!♬
Jonathan: THAT WASN'T ME!!
Narrator: The Sparks and Elecs engage in a duel of powering up Kefka's jacuzzi.
Razz: Um ... .
Andon: Well, this is ... Yeah.
Drone Sparkman: I think, somehow, we've all lost.
Kefka: (In the tub) I hear talking when I should be hearing the soothing sounds of jets against my body!
Drone Elecman: YES, MY MASTER! I'LL SHOW YOU ALL WHO RULES THE ELECTRIC CURRENTS!
Razz: Someone's more positively charged than me!?
Narrator: The Firemen are tasked with a bizarre challenge...
IRA: We have to put out a burning building!?
Drone Fireman: Did he make this just based off our name?
IRA: Do you think he even knows who I am?
Drone Fireman: I dunno what goes on in his head.
Narrator: The Bombmen are engaged in a real-life game of Bomberman!
Scott: I can't believe I'm subjected to this ... this shameful copy of me playing a game named after another shameful copy of me!
Drone Bombman: Well, the game did come out before Mega Man, so ...
Scott: Oh ! You are the worst at being me!
Narrator: And the Geminis are engaged in ... some kind of duel ..
(The Geminis are making out.)
Lennon: I won't lose.
Drone Geminiman: I am the handsomer of us two, it is I who won't lose!
Kefka: Wooooooooooo~! Exciting!
Xelloss: Indeed, Mr. Kefka, indeed.
(Kefka leaps out of his bath.)
Xelloss: Oh my!
Kefka: WHO ARE YOU AND HOW DID YOU GET IN HERE!?
Xelloss: You needn't be concerned about me. I am a very trustworthy person. My name is Xelloss, mysterious priest. And as to why I'm here, it's to view the duels from the best seats in the house, of course.
Drone: Why did the mysterious priest pop into the box seat?
Drone: That is what I want to know. Ha. Ha. Ha.
Doc Robot: Erm, I'm still working out the bugs on Drone Iceman.
Xelloss: I see.
Doc Robot: It's tricky because we don't have the real deal from which to copy the brain patterns. Maybe ... maybe if we used some people who were really, really good at their jobs in the community we'd have a great Iceman. But a lot of those guys died.
Rockman Shadow: Are we really going to just let this person pop in and loaf around as if he owns the place!?
Kefka: You're one to talk.
Xelloss: Don't mind me, I really am just here to watch! It looks like most of these matchups are over.
Doc Robot: Yes. Some have won their challenges, but most of the drones have lost.
Kefka: Oh, poo. I guess that means I have to give back some of their armour and I'll never have a complete collection.
Kefka: NUTS TO THAT! AH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH! AH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH! AH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH!
Rockman Shadow: What happened to not being able to remove them directly!?
Kefka: Well, there's a risk that it will damage my precious collectibles, but I suppose that's just something I'll have to accept.
(Kefka raises his arms and uses his powers to give independence to the Transmetal Armours worn by the drones.)
The Mechs, S6, Drones: EEEEAAAHHHH!!!!!
(With a swipe of his arm Kefka teleports the Drones in front of him. They immediately collapse.)
Kefka: Doc Robot! Examine them.
Doc Robot: And then you'll return me back to Master?
Kefka: Examine them.
(Doc Robot examines the dazed Drones.)
Doc Robot: They seem okay. They will recover their senses in a few minutes. You are lucky! That could have really fried them. But what about the Mechanical Maniacs and Sinister Six? Are they dead?
Kefka: No. Hm. And neither is he (motions to Rockman Shadow). I guess I still want you all around! AH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH!
Doc Robot: But I want to get back to Master! He needs me!
Kefka: Then you'd better hurry in repairing that armour. You have half of it now, so no excuses! Make a mistake and, well, I think I may have to reconsider the "not wanting you dead" feeling I'm having.
(Kefka gestures and a small lab is placed within a corner at the other end of the room.)
Rockman Shadow: If you need any supplies I'll be happy to provide them.
Kefka: How generous of you, unwanted trespasser!
Rockman Shadow: I aim to please.
Doc Robot: I - I will complete the armour!
(Doc Robot scurries over to the lab with the armour pieces.)
(Kefka, Rockman Shadow, and Xelloss stand around awkwardly for a few moments.)
Xelloss: Hm. It seems like all the interesting things are over. I guess I'll be off.
Kefka: Sorry to deprive you of your distractions. I heard you liked to stalk those Mechs.
Xelloss: Oh ... I'm not too worried.
Kefka: So ... pizza?
Rockman Shadow: Oh, I know of a lovely pizzeria -
(Rockman Shadow's statement is interrupted as a whirring noise fills the room.)
Kefka: A friend of yours?
Rockman Shadow: Most certainly not.
(Quint's Time Skimmer opens and Quint emerges followed by the Sinister Six, the Mechanical Maniacs, and
the Mechanical Maniacs Gamma's Disciples.
Quint: Hey there, Kefka. So sorry to ruin your little "zoo," but I take exception to your treating sentient creatures like animals!
Kefka: And who are you!?
Quint: I'm the one the monsters fear. I'm the one who keeps this planet safe from madmen like you. If you go out into the cosmos and you ask why the -
Rockman Shadow: He's just Quint.
Kefka: Oh, from that crappy Gameboy game?
Rockman Shadow: Exactly.
Gauntlet: Enough of this crap. GIVE US BACK OUR CLOTHES, YOU JACKASS!
Drone Shadowman: More like our clothes now, you third rate pretender.
Drone Geminiman: Two more Geminimen? The world can't handle this much handsome.
Lennon: You may be cute, but I won't let that stop me.
Topman: Did something happen between you two?
Tim: GIVE US BACK OUR ARMOURS! AND ICEMAN'S TOO!
Jason: Yeah, what kind of super villain are you? Using your power for petty thievery is Gauntlet's deal.
Gauntlet: HEY! Now that's not true.
Magnetman: Wait, what was that?
Shadowman: *sigh* Yeah, I know, I know.
Sparkman: Actually nothing has changed.
Drone Shadowman: That is exactly why you don't deserve this armour.
Iceman CN: I'm here too! Hello!
Done Topman: What in the name of Kefka is that?
Drone Gutsman: ENOUGH WITH THE TALKING!
(Drone Guts throws a boulder at the group, but it's destroyed by Andon.)
Andon: I'd much rather solve this using words.
Hardman: Words, smurds, I'm ready to kick some scrawny purple ass!
(Hardman launches himself at Kefka.)
Kefka: AH HAH HAH HAH! Like you could.
(Kefka deflects Hardman, only to be hit by Hadrian.)
Hadrian: Imitation me's got a point!
(Kefka is hit by both Snakemen's Search Snakes.)
Raijin: Better watch out for my sneaky self. Heh heh heh.
Snakeman: (Dies a little from embarrassment.)
Drone Snakeman: How dare - AGH!
(Drone Snakeman is hit with a Shadow Blade.)
Shadowman: (Emerging from the shadows) Too easy, knockoff.
Gauntlet: (While dodging a Top Spin) Oh, you're one to talk. I recognize you, "Ninjaman!" You identity stealing BASTARD!
(The Needles dodge each other's rapid fire weapons.)
Drone Needle Gal: I'll destroy you!
Needle Gal: Not if I destroy you first!
Drone Snakeman: Watch where you're firing that thing.
(The Drone Cutman chases after Jason.)
Jason: Damn it, running around with those carelessly is dangerous!
Drone Cutman: AH HAH HAH HAH HAH! LOSER!
(Drone Cutman trips on rubble, falls, and pokes an eye out with his own Rolling Cutter.)
Drone Cutman: YAHHH!!!
(The Drone Topman is knocked aside by twin Top Spins.)
Drone Topman: AAHH!!
Nightmare: Like a record, baby!
Drone Elecman: There's too many!
Kefka: (Deflecting Hard Knuckles) Stop whining and fight, my collectibles!
Drone Hardman: I'll knock their - oof!
(Hardman is used as a pinball between the two Magnetmen.)
Jonathan: Ah hah hah! Just like a pinball.
Magnetman: This is the closest I've come all day to having a normal adventure. So I'll relish it.
Drone Hardman: What a revoltin' development.
(Drone Magnetman tackles Jason, but is electrocuted by Andon.)
Drone Magnetman: GYAHH!
Jason: Thanks, Andon.
Andon: I may be a pacifist, but I will protect my friends.
Drone Sparkman: And I will too!
(Drone Sparkman launches a surprise attack at Andon, but it's intercepted by Razz.)
Sparkman: You'll pay for that. I'll stick my electrodes up your copy cat asshole.
Andon: There's no need for that ...
Sparkman: I just hope you don't like it. But, even if you do ...
Drone Sparkman: I-I'm not afraid. I'm filled with positive energy!
(Iceman attacks the two Firemen.)
Iceman CN: I can help! I can help!
(Iceman is fried by both Firemen.)
IRA: Get out of the way, you idiot!
Drone Fireman: Moron!
Iceman CN: OH! Oh, I ... I'm melting.
Drone Fireman: Good.
Iceman CN: Does anyone have a refrigerator handy? Or even just a popsicle?
(Cap N Iceman is blown way by explosions.)
Drone Bombman: BOMBS! BOMBS!!!
Scott: The only answer to that is more bombs!
(Both Gutsmen get blown up in this battle.)
Drone Gutsman; GYAAHH!!
Drone: Why did the Gutsmen get blown up?
Drone: Because they set them up the bomb. Ha. Ha. Ha.
(The Drone is blown apart by a Fire Storm.)
IRA: That's not funny at all!
(Rockman Shadow knocks Quint off his Sakugarne with his sword.)
Rockman Shadow: I've waited ages for this, Quint. To kill you and take my rightful place as your replacement!
(Shadow is knocked back by a Hard Knuckle.)
Hadrian: I don't think so, jerkwad.
Kefka: Why you ...
(Gag runs by.)
Gag: Hi, guys.
Kefka: What in the -
(Kefka is electrocuted, burnt, cut, hit with magnets, lasers, blades, and rocks.)
Hadrian: You gotta love a good running gag.
Gauntlet: I don't know what that was all about, but I'm glad it happened.
Hadrian: Seriously, boss? Gag's been around this entire time! Running in and out of frame is his whole thing!
(Kefka's domain shakes as its master quakes in rage.)
Kefka: Oh, you people! If I can't have your armour in minty fresh condition, then I'll settle for slightly used!
Quint: We have to go before he tears this place apart. Grab your armours and get inside the Time Skimmer!
(The Mech and Six do so.)
IRA: I don't think I'll ever get used to the fit on this.
Tim: Yeah, it's not really us, is it?
Scott: Guys, this ain't the time or place.
Jonathan: Bomb's right, let's go!
Razz: Still, we got all our armours back.
Geminiman: And the final pieces of Iceman's armour too. They were in this empty lab just off to the side. I think someone teleported out at the last second - Kefka's anti-teleportation barrier must be down.
Iceman CN: S-save me ... please?
Hardman: Oh, fine you stupid thing.
Iceman CN: It's .. so hot in here.
Hardman: Yeah, yeah.
Quint: (At Rockman Shadow) You too, Shadow.
Rockman Shadow: I don't think so. Come, now.
(Shadow's Sakugarne hits Quint unexpectedly and Shadow leaps on.)
Rockman Shadow: We'll meet again, Quint. In another time and place, we will meet again.
(Shadow rounds a corner. Quint recovers just quickly enough to hear a familiar sound as Shadow's Time Skimmer escapes.)
(Quint runs aboard his Time Skimmer just as rubble encases it. Within moments all teams escape from Kefka's domain... )
Narrator: The Mechs and the Six arrive at the Six's mansion, which is undergoing extensive repairs very quickly thanks to the Six's many friends.
Classi: Hm, you're back! Gosh, I was worried when you all disappeared.
Tim: It was no problem, just another guy who wanted a piece of us.
Gauntlet: We managed to show him, though.
Classi: Great news! Feel free to help yourselves to some mango juice!
IRA: I think I'll have some too.
Hadrian: And I'll Irish mine up a bit.
Sparkman: Here's Iceman's Transmetal armour.
Andon: Thank you, friend. My, that was quick.
Sparkman: Quint's ship is very well equipped. And I have experience with ... similar technology.
Andon: I can't thank you enough.
Sparkman: No prob! And if a sexy lady asks who fixed him up, you can tell 'em good 'ol Sparkman did the job.
Scott: I wonder what happened to that thief.
Magnetman: He probably bit the dust.
Jason: He wasn't Gary, Scott. He was just some jerk who stole his armour.
Scott: Yeah. Yeah, you gotta be right.
Magnetman: (Thought) Damn that was harsh, but I can't spill the beans. According to Quint their so-called thief was that Gary guy everyone's so hung up about. Seeing the "thief's" "death" must have brought on some painful memories for these guys, but telling them the truth would just mess up time. Sparkman managed to save his personality and make it dormant again, but it was a close call. We've gotta let this play out like it's supposed to.
Magnetman: Just carry the torch, you guys. Hold it as long as you can.
Hardman: What do you mean we can't stay!?
Needlegal: You know exactly why we can't.
Hardman: But it's my glory days.
Needlegal: You'll get new glory days.
Gauntlet: Good riddance.
Classi: Aw, don't say that. There's something about them I like.
Gauntlet: There's nothing about them I like.
Lennon: There can be two Mega Man 3 teams, can't there?
Gauntlet: WHAT!? I fought long and hard for my team, so no! Treading on the coattails of my success is NOT cool!
Classi: Are you sure you can't stay?
Geminiman: Yeah. Erm, Classi?
Geminiman: Just ... you seem to have a lot of people who care about you here. I hope you won't forget that.
Classi: Erm, no. I don't think I ever will. We're all dear friends.
Geminiman: Yes, you ... you are. I know.
Quint: Alright, everyone, back in the Time Skimmer before someone breaks something!
Mechs Disciples board Quint's Time Skimmer.)
Hardman: DON'T FORGET US!
Quint: Shut it, you big fool!
(The Time Skimmer disappears as it journeys back into the time stream.)
Scott: Okay, so now that they're gone who else thinks their Magnetman should call himself Cowboyman and be done with it?
Gauntlet: I know, right? Why isn't being Magnetman enough for that guy?
Jonathan: I dunno, I kinda like it. "Sheriff Mags." It has a nice ring to it.
Andon: I find myself taking a dislike to their Sparkman. Something about the man rubs me the wrong way.
Needle Gal: Their Needle is clearly ripping me off.
Lennon: But their Geminiman is a charming fellow with really nice armour. I wonder where he got it.
Nightmare: You would say that.
Gauntlet: I hope those overreaching jerks fall off a cliff.
Hadrian: Aw, let's not pick on 'em. It's hard being a Mega Man 3 team with us doing such a bang-up job.
Gauntlet: *humph* I'll bet that second-rate Shadowman can neither summon a frog nor turn into a log.
IRA: Yeah, I'll bet his powers actually make sense ya crazy spotlight stealer.
Raijin: Well, I guess things turned out all right...
Lennon: Hmmmm, I'll say.
Razz: I find something about that look unsettling.
Needle Gal: And we learned something too...
Andon: Ah, the famous Mechs ending where you all have the same lines every time.
Jason: It's cute. I remember when we used to do that.
IRA: Of course we had the sense to actually stop after a while!
Gauntlet: Quiet, you! It's a great running gag.
Gag: (Runs by.) You rang?
Tim: You'll get tired of it eventually.
Gauntlet: No I won't. Ever.
Needle Gal: *AHEM*
(Needlegal eyes Gauntlet and the Six.)
Needle Gal: We learned that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Sometimes when you're successful, you get imitators. It shouldn't bother you, though. Because they really just like what you're doing a lot and want to be more like you.
(The Six stare at the Mechs for a short time.)
Gauntlet: *humph* I DIDN'T LEARN THAT!
Needle Gal: Oh, really?
Gauntlet: I learned that imitators SUCK! They should be original, damn it! I try very hard to be original. It matters to me.
Tim: Wait. You think being original is important?
Tim: Is that so, Mr. "now that is a secret?"
Gauntlet: Look, that ... *sputters* It's not the same!
Nightmare: Well, until we stomp every last imitation Mega Man 3 team, we are... The Mechanical Maniacs!
Narrator: As the Mechs and the Six say their goodbyes, Rockman Shadow talks with his accomplice in his Time Skimmer which is hurtling through the time stream.
Rockman Shadow: Oh, pleased with yourself are you? I'm not. The entire thing was pointless! From reviving Iceman early to nudging Kefka into abducting the Six and the Mechs to splitting the armour into pieces. Why prevent Kefka from killing them all? Why not simply kill them all in their sleep?
Mesmerman: Shadow, Shadow, Shadow, that misses the point. I never wanted to kill them. I thrive off chaos ... and they add just the right amount of spice for the perfect soufflé. Every devil needs an angel to fight, after all. But there may be a time when even the Mechs outlive their usefulness. Just not today.
Rockman Shadow: Humph!
Cast (the past):
|Musashiden Razz as ... ..||
|Raijin as ... ..||
|Psycho Magnet as ... ..||
|Hadrian Howell as ... ..||
|Nightmare as ... ..||
|Lennon as ... ..||
|Jonathan S. as ... ..||
|Gauntlet as ... ..||
Cast (the present):
|Leon as ... ..||
|Raijin as ... ..||
|Psycho Magnet as ... ..||
|Ben as ... ..||
|Nightmare as ... ..||
|Lennon as ... ..||
|Sheriff (Kassidy) Mags as ... ..||
|Gauntlet as ... ..||