The Sinister Six In:

Interview with the 13 Ghosts

Classic Sinister Six Epilouge

Andon: Note...this Epilouge has been completed! By Gauntlet!. It's a promotion to the new horror flick by Dark Castle known as 13 Ghosts. Iceman wants to see this shit real bad. He's a fan of the old 1960 version. Also note...that this epilouge has some bad language and such... read with caution.

Narrator: Hello Kiddies, and welcome to Gary's Interview Corner. Where he'll be interviewing some freaky shit.

Gary: (faking a smile at the camera) Not in front of the children Mr. Narrator. *throws a brick at the Narrator*

Narrator: Owwww...the head.

Gary: Before we start, lets have a volenteer to ride "The Trolly Of No Return"

Narrator: I'll go! Mee mee!!

Gary: Excellent.

Audience Member: I'll go!

Gary: Trust "don't" want to. *winks*

Audience Member: Okay.

Narrator: (walks over to the trolly holding his head considering the fact that it still hurts like an S.O.B. from the brick)

Gary: *sends the trolly a flying and slams the door*

6Narrator: *screams*

Gary: That's right Mr. Narrator, today we interview some screams. The scary ghosts that will be starring in the new movie...13 Ghosts!!

Audience: *Cheers* *one guy burps*

Gary: *plops down on the chair, let's bring out our first spook. Ghost Number 1. The First Born Son

The Great Son: *appears in front of the audience* *everyone gasps*

Gary: Okay kiddo, have a seat and let's begin.

The Great Son: Don't call me kiddo.

Gary: Alright. that an arrow sticking out of your head?

The Great Son:Yes, and I don't like you. *kicks Iceman in the nads*

Audience: Owwwwwww...

Gary: It's a good thing you're already dead you little brat!!

The Great Son: *walks off the stage*

Gary: next we have The Bound Woman.

The Bound Woman: *appears in the chair opposite side of Iceman*

*everyone gasps*

Gary: did you die?

The Bound Woman: I hung myself dip shit...can't you tell?

Gary: Boy...I figure all 13 of you are in a pissy mood. I guess it makes sense. You're all DEAD!!

The Bound Woman: Well...there are 12 of us, the 13th ghost isn't revealed until the ending of the movie.

Gary: I see... I take it spoilers are out of the question.

The Bound Woman: You got it mortal. *twists her neck around*

Gary: *cringes* Anyway...tell us more about the movie.

The Bound Woman: Well, if you've seen the 1960 flick then you see this is a basic remake.

Gary: Right. What I don't understand is why a big baby guy is more scarier than the classic burning skeleton...

The Great Son: *appears on stage*

*everyone gasps*

The Great Son: YOU INSULT ME!!

Gary: Wait your turn tubby.

The Bound Woman: You shouldn't of insulted him.

Gary: What's he going to do...cry to mommy?

The Dire Mother: *appears on stage*

*everyone gasps*

Gary: Not you too! Can't you guys wait your turns...glory hogging ass whipes..

The Dire Mother: You insult my fiend. *bangs Iceman with her purse*

The Great Son: *jumps into the air and lands on Iceman*

Gary: *muffled* Okay...I give!!

The Dire Mother and The Great Son: *vanish away*

The Bound Woman: I told you...never insult a ghost.

Gary: *gets up* We'll no shit!! Okay Next!! *pushes a button and the chair that the woman is on goes flying out the window*

The Pilgrimess: *appears*

*everyone gasps*

Gary: I forget the order these ugly things come in, so on with The Pilgrimess...

Audience Member: Damn...what the hell happend to you.

The Pilgrimess: *hisses and scares the man out of the building*

Gary: So Pilgrimess, it's obvious how you got killed, so tell us more about the movie.

The Pilgrimess: Well, there's this guy named Cyrus. He collects ghosts. He keeps them on display in this house made of strong, durable glass. But the Glass has spells inchanted on them.

Gary: Neat...what do the spells do?

The Pilgrimess: They keep the ghosts at bay...they can't cross these windows if spells are written on them.

Gary: So basically the ghosts are trapped inside this enorumus glass house.

The Pilgrimess: *hisses* Correct. *starts staring at Iceman

Gary: *stares back*

The Pilgrimess: *stares back*

Gary: *stares back*

The Pilgrimess: *stares back*

Gary: *stares back*

The Pilgrimess: *stares back*

Gary: *stares back*

The Pilgrimess: *blinks*

Gary: HAH! You blinked! You lose courpse!

The Pilgrimess: You got lucky you bung hole. *vanishes*

Gary: Man...these guys are giving me the willies...anyways, next is The Angry Princess.

The Angry Princess: *appears*

*everyone gasps...then covers their eyes*

Gary: GOOD GAWD!! SHE'S NAKED! (The screen pops up on the tv set: "We are experiencing Technical Difficulties...we'll be back in a few minutes."

(Music comes back into play)


Gary: Anyways...ummm..The Angry Princess couldn't make it tonight...for certain reasons.

Guy in Audience: BRING HER BACK ON!! *All the guys shout*

Gary: Dude...she's dead...that's (censored) sick man!

Another guy in the Audience: Yeah...guess you're right.

Gary: Now...onto the next Ghost. The Torn Prince.

The Torn Prince: *appears on stage*

*everyone gasps*

Gary: So, what's your story?

The Torn Prince: Well, I'm basically a teenager from the 50's.

Gary: So you've been dead for nearly 50 years...but what's so scary about a dead old school teenager?

The Torn Prince: I carry a baseball bat, I like to bash things...

Teenybopper from the crowd: HI Prince!! *waves and winks at him*

The Torn Prince: *blows a kiss to the girl*

Gary: Ummmm...excuse me, but what the hell are you doing?

Teenybopper: He is so fine! After the show I'm inviting him over!

*Everyone else holds their mouths with their hands*

Audience: Ewwwww...

Gary: Wait a want to sleep with a guy with half his face torn off?

Teenybopper: Heck yah! That's sexy!

The Torn Prince: *winks at her*

Gary: Excuse me a minute...while I go GAG!!

(the audience is heard throwing up in the background)

Gary: *takes The Prince's bat*

The Torn Prince: HEY!!

Gary: *bashes the stupid teenybopper*

*Crowd Cheers*

The Torn Prince: Not bad for a mortal.

Gary: *throws the bat at The Prince* OFF MY STAGE!! Next!!

The Jackal: *appears on stage*

Gary: look the scariest of them all.

The Jackal: *eerie voice* Well thank you Iceman...I'm good enough for a good scare.

Gary: What's with the cage on your definatly take the cake of the scariest of the lot.

The Jackal: Like the Pilgrimess, I was punished for murdering people.

Gary: You should hang out with'd both make a great combo...anyways, it must of taken hours to do all this make up.

The Jackal: Try days.

Gary: Just don't dress like that on a date...first know.

The Jackal: You're not funny, plus I'm not just the scariest of the bunch...but the most violent!! *starts slashing at Iceman*

Gary: Ack!! *falls out of his chair* Alright!! That's it Cagey!! *smashes the ghost over the head with a mallet*

The Jackal: *is unaffected* You stink!

Gary: *starts a sniffing*'ve been dead for god knows how're the one that reaks...

The Jackal: I won't sit here and be insulted...I'm outta here. *vanishes*

*All of a sudden two FBI agents walk onto the set.*

Moulder: You se, Scully! Proof of the afterlife!

The Torn Prince: It's the FEDS!

The Pilgrimess: It's a SING!!

Scully: I don't think so, Moulder. They just look like people with bad stage makeup.

Moulder: Scully, don't you see what this means? What answers these freaky, ugly, stupid-looking ghosts can give us??

The Ghosts: HEY!!!

The Bound Woman: Oh, that's it! You're going down, pretty-boy!

*The ghosts lunge in and attack Moulder and Scully!*

Gary: Ahhhhh, well. It looks like this is just about over.

Moulder: AAHHH!!! Not the face! Not my award-winning face! AHHHHH!!!!

Gary: Hm, I think that's my cue to exit. But be here next week as I interview my good buddy Gauntlet! Mysterious ninja ...... or just a hologram with delusions of grandeur? You decide!