The Sinister Six In:


The Last Laugh

Classic Sinister Six Epilouge

Andon: Another adventure is coming over the horizen. But don't threat, this is a special treat just for you! This very "weird" Epilouge was created "ages" ago, but never was put up...until now. Iceman Had fixed it up with Magma Dragoon and made it much more entertaining. It's "our" wacky humor. So it may not make any sense what so ever, just remember that while reading. So... Sit back, enjoy, and hope you don't get whacked with any mallets...Poor Ben.

(The sun rises over Sinister Six HQ and the friendly Rooster is about ready to make his call)

Rooster: Arrhoooo Arhooo..Arhoo.....*hack* *cough* *spits out a dirty sock*

Narrator: My, I wonder what caused that...

(From inside the HQ)

Tim: Has anyone seen my other sock to this pair? Gary?

Gary: Nope...sorry Tim....*holds in his laughter*

Tim: *sighs and walks out of the room*

Gary: *laughs out loud* Mwhahahahahha! Man I love my work...*opens the oven* Mmmmm...temperature is just about right...

(At that moment Jason walks in)

Jason: Good morning Gary, what's for breakfast?

Gary: What the hell do I look like? The Chef?

Jason: Jeeee wiz...chill man. I thought you were cooking breakfast...You opened the Oven.

Gary: Well...this is for Andon. And Cooking something to actually "eat" is Scott's department.

Jason: Where is Scott anyway?

Gary: Ahhh...*checks his watch* He should be getting out of that trap I set in his snack food drawer.

Jason: *sighs* Gary...one of these days...someone is going to knock you straight into last week. These pranks have got to stop.

Gary: *closes the oven* I'd like to see them try...*laughs as he exits the room*

(meanwhile upstairs, The Six have a visitor)

Andon: What's the matter big guy?

Ben: My fave show is on in an hour, I'm worried Gary has something schemed. He's been a prankin all day.

Andon: What do you mean my black armored friend?

Ben: *with Rage* He's been annoying the hell outta me all week, It's driving me nuts. One more prank, is all it takes. I can't take it anymore you know. Everyday he's done something to me.

Andon: Should of stayed home...

Ben: *growls* Not while the Sky Lagoon is being renovated.

Andon: Not to worry Benno. Gary knows how much this show means to you...so he should respect your wishes.

Ben: I suppose you're right. Sometimes I wish you guys would be the annoying ones...

(A large flash errupts the HQ and something strange amiss is goin' on. An hour later)

Ben: Ahhh...*sits down* Everyone has gone out, including Gary, and I have the whole HQ to myself. *wide Grin* I can finally watch my show in peice. I've waited a whole year for this...I cannot miss the ending. I'll go raid the fridge in a bit...heheheh.

(Ben turns on the Tv and watchs his show)

TV Guy: OH Martha...how do we stop such a hellish creature from devouring New York!

TV Scientist: Well...the creatures are weak against...

Gary: Bop! *Something whacks Ben behind his head*

Ben: What the?

Gary: Bop! *Gary bops Magma Dragoon with boxing gloves* Hehehehehe!

Ben: GARY! *roars* What are you doing!? I thought you were out with the others!?

Gary: I was...but now I'm bored...so I'm going to bop you insane. *bop*

Ben: *looks at the TV and sees the credits* I missed...the ending....

Gary: Bop! Hehehehehehehehehehehehehe....

Ben: *roars like Godzilla* I MISSED THE ENDING! HOW DID THEY DEFEAT THE CREATURES!! GARY!!!! THAT'S IT!!!

Gary: Uh oh....

Ben: I'M GOING TO THWACK YOU INTO LAST WEEK! *takes the boxing gloves and winds up*

Gary: Mama? *gulps*

PPPPPPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW!!!

(A large vortex pops up and Gary is flying inside it with a huge implant in his cheek...soon a light opens up and Gary is warped all the way back to Sunday morning, just as Ben said, he "litterally" knocked Gary back to last week)

Narrator: But with Gary's absense...another dimention opened up around Ben...

Ben: Where the hell am I?! I'm in Sinister Six HQ...but it feels different. *Ben looks at the group picture of the Six over the mantle...but with one difference*

Ben: Why am I in the picture! And Where's Iceman!!??

(IRA comes into the room)

IRA: Good morning Ben...sleep well?

Ben: SLEEP WELL!? WHERE IS ICEMAN! THESE PRANKS HAVE GONE FAR ENOUGH!

IRA: Iceman? Who is that?

Ben: Don't play dumb IRA...The Blue Parka Wearing Prankster!

IRA: I see...Well if you're done playing in La La land...we can go to the Party.

Ben: Lala land? You got some nerve...I can still kick your ass! *Kicks IRA in the ass*

IRA: *IRA draws a mustache on Ben's face*

Ben: What the!? *whipes it off then Kicks IRA in the ass only this time his sharp toe peirce his armor*

IRA: *isn't effected* *IRA continues doodling on Ben's face*

Ben: I'm starting to get annoyed...*with doodle glasses, beard, mustache, and eyebrows*

IRA: *puts in a top hat and snickers* Not bad if I do say so myself.

Ben: *Rips out most of IRA's ass*

IRA: *IRA looks down at his ass and see's he doesn't have one* Oh! Can be fixed!

IRA: *draws another one in* Much better.

Ben: Alright...two can play at this game. *draws him a nose and shoves the marker up it*

IRA: Heh...That tickles. *draws out a big mallet and smashes it over Ben's head*

Ben: Ouch...damnit! How is this possible...THAT'S IT! *Gets a big eraser and erases IRA from existence*

(IRA is deleted)

Ben: Thank god that is over with...now to figure out what the heck is goin' on. IRA is never "that' annoying.

Narrator: So Ben explores the HQ. Looking for signs of anything normal.

Ben: Nope...this isn't right. *Ben eventually stumbles into the Kitchen*

Ben: I don't know how I got here...might as well make use of it. *opens fridge*

(Scott is seen sitting down at the table eating a sandwich in the dark)

Ben: *jumps* Whoah...where did you come from? You weren't in here when I came in.

Scott: What are you talking about...I've "been" in here.

Ben: *groans* Whatever...I just want to eat. *sits in the chair shaking the whole table*

Scott: *feels his head* Man my brain hurts...

Ben: *looking at Scott with surprise* You have a brain?

Scott: Of course I do...what do you think I am...stewpid!? *he groans as he unscrews his head*

Ben: *watchs with intrest*

Scott: *pulls out what looks like a pink spec of dust* SEEE!! *he points*

Ben: *pulls out a magnifying glass* Whoah...I guess that is a brain.

Scott: *puts it back in and flushes it down*

Ben: I'm surprised... 0_0

Scott: So was Andon at first. Gauntlet thought it was a piece of fluff.

Ben: *gets a wide grin* Scott what is 2 + 2, multiplied by 7, subtracted by 8 and divided by 4?

Scott: Hmmmmm....ummmm......Five?

Ben: 0_0

Scott: What?

Ben: *stumbles with amazement* That is correct...

Ben: *grin comes back* Want your prize?

Scott: Goodie goodie gum drops...*prances around*

Ben: *pulls out a railroad spike*

Ben: *Brings out the hammer and gives Scott a labotamy* *scene is not mature for some viewers*

(Scott now Instantly has an IQ of -8)

Ben: *decides to test it out* Now Scott, what's 1 + 1?

Scott: *thinks for a minute* Hmmmm....

Ben: *wide smile* It worked....heheheheh.

Narrator: 10 minutes later....

Scott: uhhh...2?

Ben: 0_o

Ben: Alright...that's it. *Drives the sprike farther in reducing his IQ to -75*

Ben: Scott can you sell these adult magazines to those kindergarteners?

Scott: *trembles as he walks to snatch the magazines*

Ben: This I gotta see.

(20 mintues later Scott returns with bundles full of cash...all magazines sold)

Ben: ........ Okay.... give me the cash and you can have this shiny penny.

*penny shines*

Scott: *looks at the penny* Hmmm... *snatchs it and takes off with the penny and the bundles of cash*

Ben: Okay....this isn't right... How is it that he's getting smarter!! *roars*

Ben: *Takes Boomer Kwuanger's Boomerang Cutter and slices Scott's head off and takes the money*

*Scotts head rolls around on the floor and bites Ben's foot*

Ben: *Rips Scott's head off and puts it in the garbage compacter and turns it on*

Garbage Compacter: *makes funny noises...then all of a sudden it springs to life*

Ben: What the ...

Garbage Compacter: *Scott's head has taken it over* *It is now spewing bombs at Ben*

Ben: *gets an idea* Tim! Your garbage compacter's acting up again!

*Just like he suspected...Tim hates it when things go crazy*

Tim: *comes in* Alright...I'll fix....

SFX: BBOOOOOOOMMMMM!!

Tim: *is blown sky high*

Ben: ...............

Ben: FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST SCOTT JUST DIE ALREADY! *Flames spew out*

*Ben flames the contraption and the Trash compacter blows up and is flying sky high as well*

Scott: *lands softly with a new body*

Ben: *sighs with annoyance* Now go before I eat you Scott...

Scott: *does as he's told and takes off......with Ben's Credit Card*

Narrator: Oh oh...

Ben: Which is alright since I cancelled it

Narrator: Good thinking.

Ben: Plus the Credit Card companies hate me, I ate too many of their employees... *Hears Scott screaming in the background*

Ben: *Takes a beer from the fridge and looks out the window*

Narrator: I wonder what all that screaming is about...goes to investigate with Ben*

*Scott is heard screaming with delight as he purchases the most expenseive cook book ever*

Narrator: Ummm...Ben...I thought you said they canceled that thing?

Ben: I did... but that was Rob's credit Card

Narrator: Ah....*watchs Scott leave the store all satified*

Ben: *evil smile as Scott gets arrested for credit card fraud* Finally...

Narrator: So Ben tiredly goes back to Sinister Six Hq to figure out this whole mess...and to why IRA and Scott are more annoying than usual.

Ben: All this happend when I booted Gary...I wonder if that's an important issue...

Television: And so...Scott gets out of prision with the Credit Card.

Ben: WHAT!?

Scott: *appears out of no where and gives it to Ben*

Ben: *Eats it*

Scott: *pulls out a 20 pound steak and eats it in one bite*

Ben: 0_0

Narrator: I think he's challenging you to an eat off Ben.

Ben: Oh yeah...? *Lights Scott on fire*

Scott: *runs around a blaze* Ouwwwwch! *pulls out a 80 Liter bottled water and dumps it on himself*

Ben: How can he afford this?

Narrator: Donno...strange, isn't it?

Ben: Hey Tim did you know Scott's blowing all your money on steak and bottled water?

Tim: *approachs Scott* We'll just see about that...

*large struggle* BOOOOOOOOOOOOOmmm! *Tim is blown sky high*

Narrator: 0_o

Ben: *laughs to himself and sighs* This ends now! If it worked for IRA...

Ben: *Grabs eraser and erases Scott out of exixstence*

Narrator: That should do it

*A Scott Copy comes out from the closet*

Scott: *walks up to Ben and looks up at him*

Ben: Grrrrrr....*erases him again*

Narrator: *looks around* I think it worked...

*Another Scott Copy comes out from the closet*

Ben: *getting frustrated* *Stuffs him in the closet and locks him in there*

Ben: Grrrrr.... *puts 50 locks on the door* *sits down to rest* So....tired...must rest. To bed I go.

*Ben and The Narrator comeback later to see all 50 locks broken and the closet door open*

Narrator: Impossible!

Ben: Okay this is too weird... *Teleports himself and The Narrator to Washington D.C.*

Narrator: Ahhhh....visiting the president are we?

Ben: I dunno, why not? Need to get away from that place...

Narrator: Sure...let's go on in and have a chat with the President shall we? *cracks knuckles*

Ben: *Puts on some Adamantium Knuckles and punches a hole trhough the White House*

*The president's chair turns around*

???:Can I help you?

Scott: *It's Scott*

Ben: 0_0 Gawd >_<

Narrator: This is getting annoying...

Ben: Should I rid this epilouge of him or should you? You are the blasted Narrator!

Narrator: I've tried everything...

Ben: *pulls out his time device*

Narrator: Oh oh....

Ben: Okay, *Rewinds time to the point where The Narrator and Ben gave Scott a labotamy*

Ben: We should have our memories intact.

Scott: Ohhh...what's my prize?

Ben: *digs into his pocket...Narrator closing his eyes in horror* A lollipop!

Ben: *Gives Scott his prize*

Narrator: *lets out a breath*

Scott: *prances off happily never to be seen again in this epilouge...maybe...*

Ben: Another crisis averted... *Takes a beer from the fridge*

Narrator: Yes...thank god...and here I thought Fireman was the annoying one.

Ben: BURP!

*Andon comes in...finger a blazing*

Narrator: OH no...

Andon: Someone has to talk to you about your manners....what if this was a church...or a funeral ...*continues rambling*

Ben: *Enlists Andon into the Navy* That outta do it.

*three seconds later*

*Navy arrive and pick him off*

Andon: Hey...I'm a pacifist...I don't fight wars!

Ben: You do now... *Kicks Andon out*

Narrator: Can't wait to see what happens.

*seconds later the entire Navy force is fleeing the country*

Navy Soldier: He talks to much! Make him stoppp!!

Andon: Then there was World War 2. Freedom in that time was scarce..but did fighting...

Ben: Andon? Come here.

Andon: *Andon approaches Ben* Yes my big Adamantium plated friend?

Ben: Quiet!! *Takes out a remote and mutes Andon*

Andon: *walks around mute*

Narrator: Thanks...we needed that.

*Andon pulls out his speaker phone and puts it on full blast*

Andon: NOOOWW...CAN YOU HEAR ME!? NOW ABOUT WORLD WAR 2...*continues rambling...louder than ever*

Narrator: *covering his ears* Acccck!!

Ben: *Takes out three Boomerang Cutters and tosses them at Andon*

Andon: OH...THIS IS GONNA HURT! *is sliced into three halfs*

Ben: *starts to sweat nervously* That has to stop him...he's weak against sharp weapons...

*the three peices form into three bodies*

Andon 1: NOW, WHERE WERE WE. *speaker phone*

Andon 2: AH YES...WORLD WAR 2 *speaker phone*

Andon 3: INDEED MY ELECTRIC TWIN FRIENDS...*speaker phone*

Ben: GAAAAAAAAAA!!! MY EARS!

Andon 1: THEN SOLDIERS COULD SOLVE THE PROBLEM BY...

*They quickly surrond Ben*

Andon 3: BUT NOOO! THEY HAD TO BATTLE THEIR DIFFERENCES...WHEN THEY COULD OF...

Ben: *is starting to go crazy*

Andon 2: DON'T YOU SEE...IT'S OUR REASONING THAT SOLVE DISPUTES...NOT OUR GUNS...

Ben: You guys could be doing a lot of good at the government complex right now. *covering his ears*

Andon 2: HE'S RIGHT YOU GUYS!

Andon 1: YES!! LET OUR VOICES BE HEARD!

Andon 3: ONWARD TO THE GOVERNMENT COMPLEX!!

*they all leave, voices a blaring the whole way*

Ben: Adios Andons.

Narrator: Man...it seems all the S6 members can be annoying as hell

Ben: This ain't over yet damnit...I'm not going to let them win! *Lights a bag of dog shit on fire and places it on the S6's porch and rings the bell and hides in the bushes*

*moments pass until a door opens* *a few hushed voices and the door shuts*

Ben: ???

*a few moments later the bag is thrown at MD's face from the window*

Tim: *blows raspberry*

Ben: THAT'S IT!! *Lights the S6's mansion on fire and traps them in*

Ben: DIE!! DIE!!!

Narrator: I think Ben has lost it folks...

Scott: *pulls out one massive Bottle water and puts out the HQ*

Ben: NOOO!!... *Undoes Scott's actions with his time device*

Andon: *zaps Ben's hand and chest and the device is destroyed*

Ben: *eyes twitch* THAT WAS A 500 DOLLAR PAINT JOB!!

*Ben watchs the house burn down*

Ben: *sighs a relief* Got those bastards...*turns around from a voice* Huh!?

Tim: *comes out from the ashes* Ah well... *The team is seen moving down the street towards another S6 HQ* Always carry a spare.

Ben: Only to see it burned down as well! DIE!! BURN!!

*he burns every spare base soon afterwards*

Tim: Damn...ah well...onward to the Sky Lagoon! *they all make themselves at home*

The X-Force: ...

Scott: Pass the fridge over here! *straps it to his back and takes off*

IRA: *is drinking all the booze*

Andon: *is giving lectues on the X-Force's manners*

Tim: *is rearranging the place*

Jason: *reading all the porn*

Ben: I gotta stop this. Without Iceman...all the other blasted members are even more annoying than him! They won't go away!!

Narrator: If only there was a way to get Iceman back...right?

Ben: That's it! *approaches Tim* Hey Tim...whatcha watching on the ole tube?

Tim: Ahhhh...just this special I've been waiting for all year long! Today is the Season Finale!

*close up of Ben's mouth widing a evil smirk*

Ben: So, if I made you miss it...

Tim: I'd knock your 21XX Arse into last week!

Ben: Right...so what would you do if I did this! *Ben roasts the TV*

Tim: *rage starts to build*

Ben: *stands over him awaiting to be smacked*

Tim: Ah well. *gets up and heads for the kitchen*

Ben: Huh?

*Ben goes into the kitchen*

Ben: Tim's the only one with enough strength to do this...I have to get him mad!!

Tim: *puts a sandwich together and takes a bite out of it*

Ben: So Tim...what would happen if something happend to your lunch?

Tim: I'd knock whomever messed with my food into last week!

Ben: *roasts his sandwich and it's burnt to a crisp*

Tim: *rage starts to build*

Ben: *stands over him awaiting to be smacked*

Tim: Ah well...*heads off to the Laundry Room*

Ben: You've got to be kidding Me!!

Narrator: So Ben follows Tim to the laundry room.

Tim: *starts folding laundry*

Ben: So...Tim...

Tim: Yes? *puts laundry in the basket*

Ben: What will it take to get you angry?

Tim: Well...if you wrinkled up my clothes here...I'll probably...

Ben and Tim: Knock you into last week.

Tim: Right.

Ben: *sighs* He steps up to Tim's laundry and wrinkles it all up...then roasts it all to ashes*

Tim: *rage starts to build*

Ben: *stands over him awaiting to be smacked*

Tim: Ah well...*head off for the Living room*

Ben: ............

IRA: *comes into the room drawing mustaches on Ben's face*

Scott: *comes into the room staring up at him*

Andon: *begins lecturing about this and that*

Jason: *starts to read all of Ben's private Porno*

Ben: *sweat drops* TIMMMMMM!!!

Tim: Uh?

Ben: *grabs Tim's fist and forces him to knock Ben into last week*

(A large vortex pops up and Ben is flying inside it with a huge implant in his cheek...soon a light opens up and Ben is warped all the way back to Sunday morning, just the time where he started his week visit at HQ)

Ben: Ouch....damn..that hurt. Well here I am!

*He looks around his quarters*

Ben: Alright it's Sunday. Time to find Gary.

*In the bathroom*

Gary: Come on...get in there! In! *tries to shove a bomb inside Andon's Hair Polish*

Ben: *comes in* Gary...we have to talk.

Gary: Ben...what if I was....*motions to the toilet*

Ben: I already know what pranks you're going to pull this week. Trust me...it will all backfire...on the both of us...now listen!

Gary: Yeah right...You're just trying to make me stop. Tim told you to talk to me didn't he?

Ben: *sighs* Tommorow night you're going to glue Jason's Charizard Card to The Lawn Mower...and Tuesday you're going to throw a Cupcake out the window...and Scott will go after it...

(20 mins later)

Ben: And then you'll interupt my program...and I will literally knock you into last week...and since you are not in that time stream anymore...the other members turn insane...*shivers thinking about it*

Gary: How can someone literally knock someone else into last week? I thought it was just a phrase.

Ben: So did I...so let's just wait tell this week passes by...then we'll have some fun. *snicker*

Gary: *crosses his fingers behind his back* Sure...Ben...Whatever you say...

*close up of Gary's grin getting wider*

(One Week later)

Ben: Ahhh...*sits down* Everyone has gone out, including Gary, and I have the whole HQ to myself. *wide Grin* I can finally watch my show in peice. I've waited a whole year for this...I cannot miss the ending. I'll go raid the fridge in a bit...heheheh.

(Ben turns on the Tv and watchs his show)

TV Guy: OH Martha...how do we stop such a hellish creature from devouring New York!

TV Scientist: Well...the creatures are weak against...

Gary: Bop! *Something whacks Ben*

Ben: What the?

Gary: Bop! *Gary bops Magma Dragoon with boxing gloves* Hehehehehe!

Ben: GARY! *roars* What are you doing!? I thought you were out with the others!?

Gary: I was...but now I'm bored...so I'm going to bop you insane. *bop*

Ben: *looks at the TV and sees the credits* I missed...the ending....

Gary: Bop! Hehehehehehehehehehehehehe....

Ben: *roars like Godzilla* I MISSED THE ENDING! HOW DID THEY DEFEAT THE CREATURES!! GARY!!!! THAT'S IT!!!

Gary: Uh oh....

Ben: I'M GOING TO THWACK YOU INTO LAST WEEK! *takes the boxing gloves and winds up*

Gary: *ducks the Boxing Glove*

Ben: *looks amazed* Huh?

Gary: You told me this on Sunday...remember. I knew this was coming.

Ben: *breaths* Thank god you ducked that shot...or else I'd be spending another enternity with those guys again.

Gary: Indeed.

Ben: However...there is one problem...

Gary: What's that?

Ben: YOU MADE ME MISS THE ENDING!! *roars even louder* I'M NOT GOING TO BOP YOU INTO LAST WEEK...NO NO... I'M GOING TO HAVE BARBQUE ESKIMO!!

Gary: Oh...no...*runs away* Heeeeeeeeellllp!

Tim: *looking out the window* Some hero's we turned out to be.

Jason: True. That and this was the weirdest epilouge I've ever stared in...

IRA: Not to mention the longest epilouge too!

Andon: Yes IRA. But I'm sure Gary man has learned his lesson.

*toilet papers caught on fire land inside the HQ*

Tim: What the heck!!

IRA: Fire!!!

Andon: Quick! Put it out!! Gah! My foot!

(Jason and Scott are running around ablaze)

*Outside

Ben: Nice set up Gary...to try to repeat the past.

Gary: Indeed...Good thing I taped it for you on the other teleivison set.

Ben: Yea...or I'd really have to roast your ass.

Gary: Well...let's watch them put out the fire. Marshmellow?

Ben: *sits back* Yes please. *eats a few* Revenge...my sweet sixlets...sweet revenge.

Gary: *pulls out Ben's tape* Hehehehehehehehehe....(screen fades out)

 

END!