Series 3 Issue #18 - I am Invincible

By: Ben (Magma Dragoon)

On the South American continent the Mecha Maniacs wander aimlessly through the Atcamaca Desert (The driest region in the world) do to a navigational error on Magnetman's part. Recently a certain black hedgehog had been following since their last adventure.

Hardman: Damn it Gauntlet where did you lead us this time?

Gauntlet: Will you quit your crabbing?! I know there was to be a town here somewhere…

Needlegal: You better hurry “our new friend” is already starting to see mirages…

Shadow: Pamela…

Xelloss: Don't worry Mister Gauntlet over the next hill, there's a nice little fort.

Gauntlet: Why should we trust you? You're getting us into trouble in one form or another. Remember Magma Dragoon?

Xelloss: I am sorry for his temper, but he should learn to control…

Magnetman: There he goes high on his horse again.

Xelloss: If you don't believe me Mister Magnet, go up over the next dune and you'll find the fort. But be warned.

Snakeman: Screw that… (Grabs Shadow) c'mon!

(The Mecha Maniacs run up the dune and find)

Hardman: Well I'll be damned!

Topman: It looks like Xellos was right.

Gauntlet: Okay maybe it's just me, but isn't this just a bad cliché? Isn't a fortress in the middle of the desert a bit too convenient?

Xelloss: Perhaps Mister Gauntlet, but what other choice do you have? The next town is about 100 kilometres from here.

Gauntlet: (sigh) Alright I think (for once) Xellos is right…

Topman: So who knocks?

(Shadow stumbles into the door and starts thrashing)

Shadow: Pamela! PAMELA!

(Someone opens the gate it's…)

Gate: Oh my, he's delirious! Hi Max! Come here!

Hi Max: What is it my lord?

Gate: This poor hedgehog needs to be taken to my lab pronto, and see that his friends are put in the guesthouse.

Hi Max: Yes sir.

Needlegal: (Whispers to Gauntlet) I don't recognise this clown who is he?

Gauntlet: I don't know, Ben never told me about him…

Gate: Oh didn't you hear (never mind) he was in a little accident a little while ago.

Magnetman: What do you mean accident? He's one of our most powerful allies, nothing short of the gods could send him into traction!

Gate: Never mind, just go to the guesthouse.

(Hi Max leads them into the guesthouse, which is nothing more than a huge room with eight beds)

Topman: Hey what's the big deal?! This is no house!

Hi Max: This is where you can recharge.

Magnetman: And what about Shadow?

Hi Max: Don't worry, he is fine for now!!! (Laughs like a maniac)

Maniacs: …

Hi Max: Oh sorry just taking advantage of the moment. Gate will be expecting you for dinner. (leaves)

Needlegal: Is it me or were you disturbed by that?

Snakeman: This is starting to sound like a Scooby-Doo episode.

Gauntlet: except no Scooby-Doo

Hardman: Or Daphne…

(Meanwhile in Gate's lab)

Gate: MWHAHAHAHA! My DNA cloning device is almost complete, I've already found that infedel Gemini Man now I can complete my most powerful weapon! (Laughs manically)

(Thunder cracks)

(Hi Max comes in)

Hi Max: Master, the Maniacs are ready for Dnaium extraction.

Gate: Perfect now to test my remote extractor…

(In the guesthouse)

(Xelloss appears)

Xelloss: Mister Gauntlet! I see you and the maniacs are comfortable.

Gauntlet: Ah… a chance to relax from everything we had to go through this season…

Needlegal: I swear this is like a movie we saw…

(Long pause)

Snakeman: Did you feel that?

Topman: Feel what?

Snakeman: I dunno I swear I was pinched…

(Shadow comes in)

Shadow: Hey guys what did I miss?

Xelloss: Mister Shadow! How nice that you recovered from your heatstroke!

Shadow: Uh, thanks…

Needlegal: Something's not right here…

Gauntlet: You've been saying that for the past hour.

Needlegal: Don't you swear this scenario is fimilar to you?

Hardman: Nope.

Topman: (Shakes head)

Sparkman: I think I did… The Bates Motel?

Hardman: Then Needle Gal should watch herself if she wants to take a shower!

Maniacs: (Laugh)

Needlegal: Fine… don't come crawling to me once Gate murders us all.

(Hi Max comes in)

Hi Max: My master requests your company over dinner…

Magnetman: My stomach's growling like a diesel engine…

(The Dining Room)

(Maniacs enter and take their seats)

Gate: Welcome my friends… glad you could make it. Hi Max! Ready for entertainment…

Hi Max: (Nods)

Gate: What does it take to build the ultimate life form?

Shadow: Ooh! Ooh! Me! Me!

Gate: Yes Shadow?

Shadow: Chaos Control?

Gate: (Sigh) No, first you take the most powerful parts of the most powerful robots you can find. Then mesh them together…

Shadow: Feh!

Gauntlet: Let me get this straight… you took the X-Force's DNA and…

Gate: Um no… they were too powerful and Hi Max is only one reploid…

Snakeman: The Sinister Six?

Gate: Nope.

Hardman: The whole cast of Friends?

Sparkman: Now that I can hardly imagine…

Gate: No…

(Hi Max activates the lightshow, as the table splits in half and an elevator brings up a robot that looks…)

Sparkman: It's hideous!!! It's…

Gate: My newest creation Frankie although he's was a but degraded during his creation he's the most powerful Robot Master in the whole world. He has Hard Man's upper body, Spark Man's Torso, Top Man's Legs Magnet Man and Needle Gal's arms, Shadow Man's face, Snake Man's head and as a neat touch Gemini Man's crest.

Magnetman: So you created this mix and match monstrosity… why?

Gate: I'm not some villain in a cheesy melodrama, besides you the Mecha Maniacs are my test drivers for Frankie… Go get them!

Shadow: Don't worry using the Chaos Control I'll defeat this monster.

Hardman: Uh… don't you need a Chaos Emerald to do that?

Shadow: … (runs away)

Frankie: Gauntlet? You think you're a match for me?

Gauntlet: Uh oh…

Xelloss: Ooh! It appears that Mister Gauntlet is ill-prepared to take on this menace, maybe you should try a direct assault. Maybe if Gate programmed him the wrong way, he has all your weaknesses.

Sparkman: Maybe Xellos is right… SPARK SHOCK!

Hardman: HARD KNUCKLE!

Magnetman: MAGNET MISSILE!

(Frankie is hit but shrugs off the barrage)

Xelloss: Oh no! I was mistaken, he has all your resistances!

Gauntlet: XELLOS!

Xelloss: That's my cue to flee! (disappears)

Needlegal: This may be a bad time… but I told you so!

Frankie: Heh heh heh! (Prepares to attack)

Gate: Frankie show them your ability to mix attacks!

Frankie: SEARCH LASER!

(The laser tracks Needlegal)

Needlegal: ARGH! (both faint)

Frankie: SPIN SHOCK! (Spins rapidly hits Gauntlet and Magnetman) MAGNET KNUCKLES!

Hardman: Uggg…

Topman: (groans)

Frankie: OMNI BLAST! (Rips open the fort)

The Maniacs lie still, defeated by their invincible foe. Frankie pauses.

Gate: Excellent! Return to your chamber…

Frankie: No!

Gate: WHAT?!? I'M YOUR MASTER! YOU WILL OBEY ME!

Frankie: No. Frankie independent. Frankie defeat Mecha Maniaces. Will go to conquer planet… (Blasts his way out)

Gate: … Hi MAX!

(Hi Max comes in)

Hi Max: Yes master?

Gate: Prepare the airship… we're going to follow him and implat him with my control chip!

Hi Max: As you wish my lord…

(Both leave)

Several hours later…

???: Wake up! HEY WAKE UP!

(Kicks Gauntlet)

Gauntlet: (Wakes up) Hey I'm awake now! (Gets up) Shadow you cow…

Shadow: Don't get your knickers in a jam! I brought a friend… (Points to Blaze Heatnix)

Heatnix: Hey remember me Gauntlet?

Gauntlet: Uh… no

Heatnix: Ben? Does that ring a bell?

Gauntlet: Gate said you were in a…

Heatnix: That little ass? He made it up, I just recently got a facelit along with some other X-Force members*

(*What der heck?)

Gauntlet: Speaking of Gate? Where is he and Frankie?

Shadow: Him? Oh he's in the town destroying everything. I saw Gate and Hi Max there too…

(The other ‘Maniacs start to come to their senses)

Hardman: Did someone get the number of that bus?

Needlegal: Did I tell you guys I told you so?

Maniacs: YES!

Xelloss: Yes Miss Needle as usual your feelings were justified as Gate was a mad scientist bent on world domination and used the Maniacs' talents to create a brand new war machine that proved to be unstoppable.

Heatnix: Why do I sense my blood pressure rising?

Snakeman: HEY! You have no blood…

Heatnix: You get the point nitpicker…

Xelloss: Did I mention that Mister Heatnix is actually Magma Dragoon in another form, I hope there s no bad blood between us now that you're a phoenix…

Heatnix: I swear to god that you can fight Frankie alone if you bring along Xellos, I HATE HIM!

Gauntlet: (Gets out some duct tape and wraps up Xelloss at super-speed) There

Heatnix: Thank you…

Sparkman: Actually were waiting for Gauntlet to shut Xelloss up.

Gauntlet: Then you and Nightmare won't mind watching him.

Topman and Sparkman: WHAT?!?

Gauntlet: We need a couple of people to keep watch if Xelloss should escape, we need the raw power of Shadow and Blaze Heatnix.

Magnetman: Lately we've been needing all the help we can get from Magma Dragoon in all his forms*

(*Series 3 #12,#14 and Capcom Team-up)

Heatnix: Well if you don't want my help…

Magnetman: Hey, I didn't say we didn't want your help…

Heatnix: At this rate… Frankie will destroy the town… TELEPORT DISK! (Telepoerts himself, Shadow and the Maniacs save for Top Man and Spark Man)

Sparkman: So… alone…

Topman: Aw… shut up!

Xelloss: (Muffled screams)

(Meanwhile in town the Teleport disk opens dumping the motley crew unto the battlefield)

???: MAGMA SHOCKER!

Hi Max: (Get hit by thousands of magnetic-homing sparks) ARGH!!!

(Hi Max is trenched, right next to…)

Hardman: YE-ouch!

Gate: Amazing this drone's capability go beyond even a Hi-end reploid! Maybe I should take some Reploid Dnaium…

Frankie: HAHA HA! SCEARCH SNAKE!

(Frankie starts to go after Gate)

Gate: What? I created you! Back! Back…

Shadow: (Runs toward Frankie with a chaos emerald in hand) CHAOS SPEAR!

(Blaze Heatnix flies atop Frankie)

Heatnix: MAGMA BLADE!

(Frankie blast Shadow and Heatnix back but they keep on fighting)

Needlegal: This is no use. There is no way we can defeat him… (Looks around) Hey where's Gauntlet?

Gauntlet: (Appears) Look what I stole from Gate's lab pocket? (Shows the instruction manual for Frankie mk 1)

Magnetman: If you haven't noticed there's a battle raging on out there and we're reading the instruction manual?

Gauntlet: Ben and Shadow can keep Frankie occupied for a few more minutes, look he has an external force-field generator. It's to protect him from our weapons which he's weak to…

Needlegal: Ah so if we get Titanium to generate an Electromagnetic Pulse he can knock out Frankie's force field!

Magnetman: Wait wouldn't that short us out as well?

Gauntlet: No, all Robot Master from the third rebellion onward (and reploids too) are shielded against EMP, so we'll be fine…

Magnetman: Uh huh… here goes nothing… (Eyes glow as he unleashes an Electromagnetic Pulse on the whole town)

(Mean Ben and Shadow continue to battle Frankie)

Heatnix: PHOENIX WING!

(Knocks Frankie into a wall, Frankie gets up)

Gauntlet: That's our cue to attack!

Hardman: HARD KNUCKLE!

(Frankie is blasted a full 100 metres)

Needlegal: NEEDLE CANNON!

Frankie: ARGH!

Snakeman: SEARCH SNAKE!

(Gauntlet leaps into the air)

Gauntlet: Now to finish it off… (Throws three Shadow Blades at Frankie, each at different locations)

(Frankie falls down dead)

Maniacs: !!!

Needlegal: Gauntlet you killed him!

Magnetman: I thought you were capable of lying, cheating, and stealing but never…

Snakeman: Murdering!

Magnetman: Yeah that's something Ben would do!

Heatnix: HEY!

Gauntlet: (Starts to laugh)

Magnetman: He's gone insane!

Shadow: Which of us is next?

(Gauntlet removes the blades stuck in Frankie's head. Frankie gets up)

Frankie: Hello, I'm Frankfurt your butler…

Maniacs: !!!

Needlegal: I thought you…

Gauntlet: …killed him? Hardly! I gave him a lobotomy, changing his personality from a crazed war machine to our personal servant.

Hardman: What about the time when you tried to enslave Sigma and Mega Man Juno?

Gauntlet: I am well versed in Robotics Engineering and Frankfurt's “brain damage” should be permanent…

Frankfurt: Should I fetch you glass of lemonade?

Gauntlet: Ah maybe later…

Magnetman: What about Gate?

(Everyone stares at Gate)

Gate: Uh oh… (Tries to start the engine but nothing happens)  Infernal machine! Why won't it start?

Heatnix: (Scoops up Gate) It looks like that electromagnetic pulse killed it's electrical systems…

Shadow: And that's the end of that chapter…

 (Sparkman and Topman show up in a swanky new space-carrier)

Sparkman: Hey Gauntlet! Look what I found back at that fort!

Xelloss: Well it looks like the action's over, I bet Mister Spark and Mister Top wished they were a part of the action…

Sparkman and Topman: SHUT UP!

Heatnix: Uggg… I've had enough Xelloss for TWO lifetimes, I'm outta here…

Needlegal: What about Shadow?

Shadow: Um… I think I'll go with Ben, he's offering me a place to stay anyways…

Magnetman: WHAT?!? I thought you wanted to hang with us!

Shadow: No offence but you dragged me through the godforsaken desert and the driest one on the planet nonetheless.

Needlegal: No one said you had to follow us!

Shadow: You were my best hope to find civilization, now that I found Blaze Heatnix. Well… SEE YA!

Heatnix: Yeah… our job is done.

(Shadow and Ben disappear through the time portal with Gate and Hi Max in tow)

Needlegal: Everything turned out okay after all.

Magnetman: A comfy space-carrier to travel in and a brand new servant to abuse.

Frankfurt: I look forward to that sir…

Gauntlet: well the sun's almost down so I think we better get a move on.

…

…

(The maniacs stare at Nightmare)

Topman: What?

Snakeman: You usually get the last word…

Topman: I don't feel like it. You can do it.

…

…

Hardman: Well until Nightmare feels like getting the last word in we are the Mechanical Maniacs!

Topman: Natch!

THE END

Cast:
Sean as .....	Sparkman	Jacob as .....	Snakeman	Psycho Magnet as .....	Needlegal
Jonathan as .....	Hardman			Nightmare as .....	Topman
Lennon as .....	Geminiman	Titanium 91 as .....	Magnetman	Gauntlet as .....	Shadowman