The
Dastardly Trio:
Issue #1: Flight 181
Inspired
by my friends "Ken and Jacob", The Movie Final Destination,
The Twilight Zone Movie, and Devon Sawa.
Andon: What is this? This ain't no Sinister Six Adventure.
Oh well. The story is still funny and worth a read I
guess. Plus it co-stars our Eskimo friend Gary! So enjoy
it and what not and we'll see you in Season 3!!
(entrance airport music comes in while small hover crafts
take off)
(people chatting outside airport while three figures
walk towards entrance)
Ken: Man, I thought that Shuttle Bus would never get here!
Gary: Well, we're here aren't we?
Jacob: Okay guys, you can go now, you don't have to walk me
to my gate.
Gary: What's the matter? Afraid we'll cause some trouble?
*laughs*
Jacob: You always cause trouble...
Ken: *rubs hands together* *being sarcastic* We'll keep
out of trouble.
Gary: Yeah....
Ken
and Gary: FOR THREE SECONDS!! (start acting crazy)
Jacob: Oh no...
(Gary and Ken start dancing around and acting like insane
lunatics)
Jacob: Guys...people are starting to stare.
Ken: *jumps on the guard rails and slides down*
Gary: *knocks over several trash cans*
(Jacob then walks into the Airport as fast as he can
and tries to lose Gary and Ken)
Jacob: I have to get away from those two!! I'm going crazy!!
Announcer: Flight to Paris, France at 8:25 is now boarding.
Jacob: Oh no!! I'll never make it in this form! *looks at his
watch*
(Jacob then sees the arrival and departure board standings
flicking around)
Jacob: Weird. *runs to a saluted area* Snakeman transform!
(In an instant Jacob is now Snakeman from the Mechanical
Maniacs)
Jacob: Now to quickly get to my gate.
(He uses his abilities and quickly finds his gate)
Jacob: Good thing I didn't need to check this luggage.
Door
Handler: Welcome to Flight 181, departure at 8:25
P.M. I'm sorry, We don't allow Robots in...
Jacob: No time...Snakeman detransform! *He is back to normal*
Door
Handler: *Looks dumbfolded*.
Jacob: It's all in the DNA strands. You see, Gauntlet had let
me join the Mechanical Maniacs, and I can transform
and detransform at will using the DNA sequence that
he had injected in me. Bascially all members of the
Megaman Community can do this.
Door
Handler: Is it contagous? *rips his plane ticket
and gives back the other half*
Jacob: Nope! This DNA sequence is perfectly safe to other humans.
You can easily mistake me for a human! It's really the
design in each of us that makes us unique.
Little
Kid: What does DNA mean mister?
Jacob: *looks at the wall*
Jacob: *vanishes into the gate that leads to the plane*
Ken: HEY JACOB!!
Gary: We got tickets too! Isn't that great!!
Jacob: GET OUTTA HERE! I'M GOING ON VACATION TO GET AWAY FROM
YOU TWO!! *pushes them back out into the airport*
(the door closes behind Jacob)
Jacob: *sighs a relif*
(Jacob walks down the long hallway looking through the
windows)
Ken: *outside the plane* Hey Jacob! Where ya going?!
Gary: *starts playing with the planes wheels*
Jacob: *looks the other way* They can't get on...they can't
be doing this...*he looks back* (Ken and Gary aren't
there)
Jacob: The security guards must have taken them away...thank
gosh.
(Soon Jacob finds his seat and sets his bag in the over
head compartment then sits down to relax)
Jacob: Thank god I got away from those two...*sighs*
(Soon someone sits down beside him)
Jacob: Hey, aren't you...*looks at him*
Devon
Sawa: Devon Sawa...yeah...just be quiet okay. I'm
trying to keep a low profile.
Jacob: So am I...I'm trying to get away from....*looks out
the window*
Ken
and Gary: *start running around the airplane*
Jacob: THEM!!! *looks away*
Devon
Sawa: *looks outside the window* I don't see anything.
Jacob: Huh? *looks back and Gary and Ken aren't there* Oh Thank
God.
Devon
Sawa: *starts reading a magazine*
Jacob: I'm going nuts. I better just shut the shade...
Ken
and Gary: *start throwing baggage around the parking
lot*
Jacob: *closes the shade* *whispers* Please...go away guys.
Devon
Sawa: What's the matter?
Jacob: Nothing, dont' worry about it. *starts sweating*
Devon
Sawa: Boy...and I thought my agent was weird.
(soon a loud thump startled the passengers and the plane
soon got on the runaway to take off)
Jacob: Only a few more minutes it'll be over and I'll leave
those two behind me.
(The plane starts to head off faster)
Jacob: *slowy opens the shade and opens his eyes*
Ken
and Gary: *Start running beside the plane acting
like lunatics*
Jacob: *closes his eyes pretending not to see what he saw*
Please go away...
(The plane soon took off and Jacob looked out the window
and Gary and Ken were gone)
Jacob: *relaxed in his seat*
Devon
Sawa: You look like you just got a big load lifted
off your shoulders.
Jacob: Two big loads...you know...do you have two friends who
are...*looks at Devon*
Devon
Sawa: *starts staring into space*
Jacob: Devon...are you alright?
Devon
Sawa: *grabs Jacob* The Plane!! It's going to blow
up!!
(People start getting nervous and scared)
Jacob: Ummm...don't say that on the plane.
Devon
Sawa: I'm serious!
(The Plane starts moving uncomfortably and lights flicker
on and off)
Pilot: Everyone remain calm...the plane is going through some
turbulance...just remain in your...
(The intercalm went to dead silence while the plane
started shaking back and forth)
Jacob: What the heck is going on!!
Devon
Sawa: Not again! I got to get off this plane!
Jacob: Now, how do you propose we do that!
Devon
Sawa: *looks Jacob in the eye* No Final Destination!
Jacob: What do you mean no Final Destination? Are we going
to make it to Paris?
(Before Devon could speak the plane started catching
on fire and a giant ripping sound could be heard from
the wing*
Jacob: *looks out the window and the wing is missing* HOLY !!
(At that point fire engulfed everyone on the plane and
then...)
Jacob: *wakes up in excitement*
Pilot: Thank you for selecting Delta. We are about to depart
to Paris, France. Flight 181. Please enjoy your flight.
(The Seatbelt signs flash on)
Jacob: What an awful dream...at least I got away from those
two.
(Soon someone sits down beside him)
Jacob: Hey, aren't you...*looks at him*
Devon
Sawa: Devon Sawa...yeah...just be quiet okay. I'm
trying to keep a low profile.
Jacob: So am I...I'm trying to get away from...wait a minute...this
seems familar...
Jacob: *quickly looks out the window*
(nothing out there except the usual people loading the
baggages onto the plane)
Devon
Sawa: What are you so worked up about?
Jacob: I just had the most frightening dream. I dreamt that
my two lunatic friends where driving me nuts...then
I got on this plane and I saw you. Then you got out
of your seat and starting saying the plane was going
to explode. Then it did, and...
Devon
Sawa: ENOUGH MAN!! Why does everyone have to keep
bothering me about that stupid movie! It's just a movie!
Everytime I get on a public plane, some guy has to say
"The plane's going to explode!" "Are you going to get
up and start yelling!" "Can you do the Final Destination
Bit for me!?" Ugg...I'm sick of it!!
Jacob: I'm sorry, it just seemed so real...I guess.
Devon
Sawa: I don't want to talk about it. *puts on his
headphones*
Jacob: *lays back and stays awake*
(The plane starts moving on the runaway and is about
to take off)
Jacob: *looks out the window quickly*
(No Ken or Gary)
Jacob:*sighs
a relif* Just a dream...that's all it was.
(The Plane then took off into the night sky)
(20 minutes pass and Jacob comforts himself as the plane
levels out)
Devon
Sawa: *talking to his agent on his cell* Book the
tryouts to Friday, I got a photo shoot tonight. Plus
I'm visiting friends and family Friday Morning. busy
busy!!
Jacob: *whispers to himself* Can't belive I'm sitting next
to "the" Devon Sawa. Maybe I should get an autograph
for Gary...
(At that moment he heard noises from outside the plane
and he looks out)
Ken: *starts sawing peices of the wing*
Gary: *pounds the wing with a hammer*
Jacob: *looks away normally then looks back to the wing in
shock* WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING HERE!!??
(Everyone looks at Jacob strangely)
Jacob: IT'S IMPOSSIBLE!!
Ken
and Gary: *wave at Jacob then go back to dismantling
the wing*
Jacob: WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING!!??
Devon: Hey man...keep it down.
(A flight attendant comes up)
Flight
Attendant: What seems to be the problem here?
Jacob: THERE ARE TWO CRAZY LUNATICS OUT ON THE WING!!
Flight
Attendant: *looks out there and sees nothing* Ummm..sir.
There's nothing out there.
Jacob: *looks out there and as well sees nothing* I...I...could
of sworn.
Flight
Attendant: Please calm down sir. You were probably
seeing things.
Jacob: Yeah...I guess so. *looks back outside and it's clear*
I guess I let my imagination get the best of me.
(The Attendant leaves)
Devon: You going to be alright?
Jacob: Yeah...*whipes the sweat from his head* I'll be fine.
*looks out the window*
Gary: *whacking the wing with a even bigger hammer*
Ken: *starts sawing the far side of the wing*
Jacob: NOOOO!! GUYS STOP IT! WHAT ARE YOU IDIOTS DOING!!??
(people start looking at Jacob again)
Jacob: Attendant! Come look quick! THERE'S TWO MEN ON THE WING!!
(The Flight Attendant comes back and looks out the window)
Flight
Attendant: Look sir. Would you please calm down.
There's nobody out there. Look! *she points out the
window*
Jacob: *looks outside and see's nothing* I....know....what...*panting*
I saw. They....were banging.....on the....wing...
Devon: I'll keep him under control
Flight
Attendant: Please do...he's scaring the other passangers.
Jacob: *starts sweating and biting his nails looking outside
the window...seeing nothing*
Devon: *shuts the shade* Let's just close that okay. I don't
think you told me your name. May I ask?
Jacob: J...Jac...Jacob.
Devon: Okay Jacob. We're friends here. You're scaring the other
passangers...please just settle down. There's no one
on the wing. Okay? Do you want to chat to keep your
mind off that window?
Jacob: No...I'll be fine....just need to get myself back together.
Devon: Alright. Remember, I'm here if you need some help. The things I do for fans.
Jacob: *looks at the seat in front of him...then to the shade*
There's nothing out there...there's nothing out there.
*He repeats this to himself while looking at the shade*
Jacob: *with suspection he studies the shade* There's nothing
out there...nothing out there. *He opens it up quickly*
Ken
and Gary: *knocking on the window and waving*
Ken: *starts breathing on the window*
Gary: *hits the window with his hammer*
Jacob: *jumps and screams like a girl in his seat*
(everyone on the plane jumps)
Jacob: *unbuckles his seatbelt and almost falls on Devon tring
to get out of his seat.
Devon: Where are you going Jacob? *looks out the window and
sees nothing*
(in the restroom)
Jacob: *puts his hands on his head* I'm losing my mind. I'm
supposed to be on vacation...why am I seeing those guys
for!? They can't be on the wing. Think logic Jacob.
It competly defies all laws of physics. A real person
would be blown clean off that wing.
Jacob: I'm going to be okay...I'll just stop looking outside.
*he calmy opens the door*
(everyone looks at him oddly as he goes back to his
seat)
Flight
Captain: Sir...I'm going to have to ask you to calm
down, or we'll have to put you in restraints.
Jacob: I'll be fine...I'm just scared that's all. I'm not anymore.
Flight
Captain: Okay sir...don't make me have to use the
restraints. *he leaves*
(Devon allows Jacob to sit in his seat and he found
the shade closed again)
Devon: You're not doing this because of my movie are you? Cause
if you are...it's not funny.
Jacob: Nooo...please don't get mad. I'm just a little nuts
that's all.
(later things calmed down for a while and everyone fell
asleep. Jacob was really uptight and tried to sleep...but
couldn't)
Jacob: *starts twiddling his fingers* Yup...nothing wrong here.
I'll prove it. *opens the shade*
Ken: *setting the wing a blaze*
Gary: *freezing the engine under the wing*
Jacob: WHAT ARE YOU FREAKS DOING!! YOU'LL KILL US ALL!!
(Everyone wakes up)
Ken: *waves then shoots a flame thrower at the wing*
Gary: *starts rewiring the engine*
(The plane starts to ravel back and forth)
Jacob: NOOOO GUYS! PLEASE...GO AWAY! DON'T MAKE ME COME OUT
THERE! *starts banging on the window*
(people start panicing)
Devon: *starts holding Jacob back* You don't want to be put
in restraints man...calm down.
Jacob: NOOO...I CAN'T CALM DOWN AS LONG AS THOSE TWO ARE CONSTANTLY
ANNOYING ME! I'M GOING TO PUT AN END TO THIS!! *starts
hitting the window*
Captain: Get those restraints in here!!
Jacob: Can't transform into Snakeman...to dangerous.
Ken: *knocks a peice of the wing off*
Gary: *starts riding the engine as it starts leaking oil*
Jacob: THEY'LL KILL US ALL! LET ME OUT THERE!! I'LL STRANGLE
THEM BOTH!!
The
Captain: Get those restraints on him stat! *they
pull Devon Aside*
Devon: I'm sorry Jacob...I tried.
Jacob: *is thrown on the floor* MUST STOP THOSE INSANE LUNATICS!
LOOK OUT THE WINDOW!!
Ken: *continues banging on the wing*
Gary: *throws the engine from the wing*
(The Plane starts to die on the right side of the plane
and the lights go out)
Captain: Get the back up generaters going! The right engine just
stalled!
Jacob: IT DIDN'T STALL! THE TWO MEN ON THE WING!!
Captain: Get this guy tied down tight. We don't want him going
ballistic at this time!
(Insane laughter can be heard by Jacob outside the plane)
Ken: You can't escape us Jacob!
Gary: You created us...now you'll live with us for the rest
of your life!!
Jacob: *starts sobbing* NOOOOOOO!! GO AWAY YOU GUYS!! *breaks
the straps*
Ken: *shoots a Flame Thrower at the window*
Jacob: STOP IT GUYS! GUYS! GO AWAY!!
(At that moment the plane had lost some balance)
Captain: *knocks Jacob over the head with the end of his gun*
(All goes black)
(Later the plane had landed down at Paris and lots of
cops were at the scene)
The
Captain: Things were pretty grim at the last 20
minutes. Good thing we were so close to the airport
when the plane's right engine had died.
Cop
1: What about him? *points to Jacob who is on a
stretcher being pulled to an ambulance?
The
Captain: That's the weirdest thing. He said he saw
two men on the right Wing. *leads the cop to the plane*
Cop
1: Oh my gosh...
(The Plane's right wing had been nearly competly destroyed)
Jacob: It's over. No more.
Devon: I'm heading over to The Studios to have a photo shoot.
I wish you the best of luck Jacob. I'm sorry we couldn't
meet on better terms. *shakes his hand*
Doctor: Alright back up Mr. Sawa. We're taking him to The
Hospital.
Devon: I hope he'll be alright.
(Jacob is lifted into the ambulance and the doors shut
behind him)
Jacob: Must relax. Need sleep
Nurse: *opening front door* It's a long drive to the hospital
Jacob. Just sit tight.
Jacob: Sit tight. Anything...just as long as I can get away
from...
(Jacob is stopped in his tracks)
Ken: Us!?
Gary: That's right Jacob...it's a "long" drive to the Hospital...and
I'm driving! *laughs like a crazy mad man*
(The ambulance begins to dart off fast and flys all
over the street)
Jacob: WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS!!!!???
END!
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