Gauntlet's Guide to being X-treme!

From the dawn of the English language, this day was coming. One day someone would discover the "ex" in "extreme" could be replaced by an "x". And on that day shall the world know suffering! Anguish! Despair! For on this day would the populace be dumbed down. For with this word "Xtreme" comes a dumbing down of intelligence! This is what I refer to as "the Xtreme movement"!

Let me explain. This word is more than a simple idiotic shortening of a word. It represents what corporations would have you believe is a "hip new attitude"! No longer can something simply be "cool" oh no! Not it's "Xtreme"! Doritoes is now ... "Doritoes Xtreme"! Avengers became .... "Avengers Unplugged!" The Justice League became .... "Extreme Justice!" Not even my beloved Megaman X was safe with "Megaman Xtreme"! What do these "Xtremeifications" mean for the general populace? Well, let's take the "new" Ghostbusters "Extreme" as an example....

1) Proton Packs became heavier, gaudier, and more complex, but essentially did the same thing their 1980 counterparts did with less effectiveness.
2) Ecto-1 (their car) was fitted with complex gizmos and contraptions. It was littered with new designs. However, it was essentially no better than before.
3) The Ghostbusters now have "attitude"! One is a gothic girl who gives everyone a hard time because she is on constant PMS. The other is a guy who doesn't take anything seriously. He looks like he came straight out of a trashcan. And the last is some crippled guy who seems to be the teacher's pet. But, neither other new member listens to him. Does this new "attitude" help the Ghostbusters? Well, let's take score now. The original Ghostbusters had a multi-successfull toyline, a TV series that ran 3 seasons, several spin-offs and 2 movies. The "Xtreme" Ghostbusters have has one unsuccessful toy line and 1 season of a unsuccessful TV show. And in that show, their proton packs were constantly stolen and there is constant dysfunction within the team. Score one for the REAL Ghostbusters!

That really sums up the "Xtreme movement" pretty well. Everyone has lip that they give constantly, however they are essentially no better ..... sometimes even worse .... than they would be without the "Xtreme" formula.

So how did the "Xtreme" come about? Did several really awesomely hip people get into a room and define cool? Uh, no. Actually, several professionals (and people probably over 30) went and reviewed youth culture. They found several repeating themes (like "attitude", and "complex, but unnecessary decoration"). Then, making several carefully planned tests and products, they created something "edgy" and "Xtreme". Really, what separated "Avengers" from "Avengers Unplugged"? Avengers Unplugged certainly didn't fare as well as the regular series.

"Is there anything Xtreme that is actually 'Xtreme?'" you may ask. Well, I think the "Xtreme sports" might qualify. There's nothing more "Xtreme" than defying death for real after all. But the products that try to identify with youth culture by going "Xtreme" are more in tune to the "poser" culture.

Then why do it at all? Well, over the short term it helps. Plus I hear that seeing X instead os "ex" actually makes the word look more desirable. Many see the word "Xtreme" and think "woah, dude ... this must really be Xtreme! It says so right there on the box, dude!" Of course then they try the product out and find that "hey ...... THIS SUCKS!!"

I am Gauntlet and this has been Gauntlet's guides.