Darkman's Robot Warriors

DRW starring in:
"The Good, The Bad..."

By Stone Man

Whilst Gyro, Napalm, and Charge have gone off to try and get a part in the new 'Scooby Doo' movie, the others are searching for a new base...

Star ManStar: Dammit. If only we hadn't underestimated Arch...

Stone ManStone: Shh!! I can almost hear the TV through the glass!

TVTV: "...mumble mumble..."

Storekeep: Get away from my shop window! You're scaring away the customers!

Crystal ManCrystal: Customers? At this time of night?

Star ManStar: If anything, we're scaring away prospective burglars.

The four reluctantly wander away from the shop

Stone ManStone: Argh. I'd never seen that episode before!

Gravity ManGravity: Hmm... Perhaps we should've sent you off with the others...

Stone ManStone: Shut up.

Star ManStar: Hey- I wonder what happened to Gimmick when the base blew up?

Crystal ManCrystal: Hmm... lemme think... He got blown up?

Gravity ManGravity: Possibly... but he wasn't there when we first arrived back...

Stone ManStone: Poor little guy... He's probably scattered all over the city...

Star ManStar: That's horrible! We will avenge his death- I swear!

Crystal ManCrystal: Ah well, Housekeepers come, housekeepers go...

Stone ManStone: Yeah- so do houses. (sits down by the side of the road) Guys, what are we gonna do?

Gravity ManGravity: Can we claim the damage on insurance?

Crystal ManCrystal: Under what? Acts of God? Arch is barely a real threat, let alone a God...

Star ManStar: They'd never believe us- we've been short on money for ages, they'd think we did it!

Stone ManStone: Allow me to point out... firstly we've never had insurance, and secondly we didn't even own the place!

Crystal ManCrystal: Uh yeah, good point.

All of a sudden...


Gravity ManGravity: Ack!

Stone ManStone: You stupid pink oaf! What the hell are you doing here?

Star ManStar: Who cares? Lets... FIGHT!

GeorgoGeorgo: NO FIGHT, NO FIGHT.

Crystal ManCrystal: Uh?

Gravity ManGravity: Perhaps he's finally realised our immense power!


Crystal ManCrystal: Okay, I think we got that, but- DO YOU HAVE TO TALK SO LOUD?!!

GeorgoGeorgo: Sorry.

Stone ManStone: So, if you don't want to fight- what's the problem?

GeorgoGeorgo: Arch! He's missing... There was a big explosion and...BOOM!

Stone ManStone: Well, I don't blame him for that! I'd be missing too, if I got on the wrong side of us!

Crystal ManCrystal: Heh-heh, yeah...

GeorgoGeorgo: Wha? Arch no cause boom! Arch was searching trash cans for food!

Star ManStar: He didn't cause the explosion?!

Gravity ManGravity: He gets his food from trash cans?!

GeorgoGeorgo: Is so sad! (sits down)

Stone ManStone: Uh, yeah. I think I'm getting a bit emotional too.

Crystal ManCrystal: Hmm...This would make a great book! ......on second thoughts... nah.


Man: Eugh... This popcorn is awful...

Woman: Honey, are you sure this is a cinema? It looks just like the side of the road.

Man: By Jove, you're right! We've been sitting by the road the whole evening!!

Woman: Lets go home then. I forgot to feed the cat, anyway. (They leave)

END INTERLUDE- Normal programme resumes...

Gravity ManGravity: Oh good- those people have gone. It was a bit creepy with them staring at us.

Stone ManStone: You're such a wimp.

Gravity ManGravity: But it was so unnecessary! I mean, what is this- Big Brother?

Star ManStar: YES! Big Brother!! Why don't we apply to join it- we might win some money for a new base, and we'll have a roof over our heads at least!

GeorgoGeorgo: Uh, I go home now.

Later on, after they have walked to the TV studios...

Receptionist: Oh God! Not you again!

Crystal ManCrystal: Er, I'm sorry. Have we met?

Receptionist: Yes! In Episode 4- You accused me of being a woman!

Crystal ManCrystal: You mean to say you're a man?!

Stone ManStone: Hehe.

Receptionist: Yes! Well, er no... Ever since you said that to me, I felt I wanted to be a woman. So now I am.

Stone ManStone: Euugh...

Gravity ManGravity: I didn't want to know that...

Star ManStar: Ahem... Anyway, We are here to join Big Brother...

20 Minutes later...

Receptionist: You're joking right? No-one would air a television show like that!

Star ManStar: You don't show it then?

Receptionist: I've never even heard of it before. It sounds really, really boring- a bunch of people sitting around doing nothing all day?

Crystal ManCrystal: I'm a natural.

So once again, they return to the streets...

Stone ManStone: Okay... What should we do now?

Gravity ManGravity: I dunno... We keep going back and forwards...

Crystal ManCrystal: Hey! How'd you do that cool thing with your voice?

Gravity ManGravity: Huh?

Star ManStar: You know- your voice was, um, moving...

Stone ManStone: Yeah, it was pretty cool.

Gravity ManGravity: Really? I didn't notice I was doing it... it must have been an accident.

Crystal ManCrystal: Hehe, maybe your voice is breaking.

Gravity ManGravity: Shaddup.


StrangerArch: You! What have you done with Georgo?!

Star ManStar: Arch!

StrangerArch: Good servants are so hard to find these days!

Crystal ManCrystal: You're telling me! You blew up Gimmick!

Stone ManStone: Yeah! You're in for it this time- blowing up our headquarters, the nerve!

StrangerArch: What? I didn't blow up your base! I was dining in a fine restaurant!

Star ManStar: Fine restaurant? Hah! That's not the way we heard it!

Stone ManStone: Hehe...

Gravity, Stone, and Star begin to discuss intricacies with Arch...

Will they ever solve the mystery of the disaster? And what have the others been doing?



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